Alright – so today we’ve got the honor of introducing you to Pearl Madryga. We think you’ll enjoy our conversation, we’ve shared it below.

Alright, Pearl thanks for taking the time to share your stories and insights with us today. What did your parents do right and how has that impacted you in your life and career?

I hold a deep sense of gratitude for my parents in relation to my death work. They have never really understood what I do fully but they show up. They support me because they love me unconditionally. This is precious because this is exactly why I offer a living funeral ceremony and why I educate about death work – to feel more real, seen, and loved as you are.

They’re both models of undying affirmation and I know they will always have my back. I will remember them this way when they die.

Great, appreciate you sharing that with us. Before we ask you to share more of your insights, can you take a moment to introduce yourself and how you got to where you are today to our readers.

my death story.

as I began to write this my eyes were flooding.
I am exhaling my fragility and have laid myself open to be fully seen.

when I was young I used art as a way to connect with my intuition.
I created these god-like figures as children hovering above a scene of chaos.

my first meeting with death came when one of my classmates died by suicide. she jumped off a bridge into oncoming traffic.
my first funeral was for a family friend my age who was shot in the head in his bedroom by his best friend.

I was in search of the thing that was underneath the thing.
what are we doing here? why are we here at all?

I’ve spent my life trying to make sense of my body, my sex, my skin color.
I found mirrors everywhere around me. I looked at them but never saw my soul. my me.
thoughts of suicide arose more often.

my threshold came when I fully surrendered and thought if I moved to Tanzania I would “find” myself. I would feel whole. I would feel seen.

a month before my trip a close friend scheduled me for a session with a well known psychic. I had no idea what I was walking into. inside of all the fear. all the unknown. there was still this softness and safety surrounding me.

I was so exhausted with myself at this point I could barely get out my story. I asked him why I always looked in the mirror. I asked him why I felt like a 13 year old black boy. I asked him why when people walk down the street I can feel them and cry for no reason. I asked him why I wanted to die.

I can still remember him giving me a long sigh and shaking his head back and forth. He looked at me and said “ I understand why you want to die. I understand why you want to go to Africa. You will not find yourself there. When you lived there it was very different. You were a warrior and hurt many people. You are very strong and I understand if you need to die but we need you here.”
this was the first time in my life where I felt truly seen.

I dived into my past. I began past life regression work. I found over and over that my lives ended alone. I died alone. without friends or family near me. without really finding my power, purpose or forgiveness. I found that I can hold space for death. nothing feels deeper for me than being a still present moment for someone looking at death or on the edge.

undergoing my first living funeral ceremony I knew I had come to rest. an in-depth death meditation. writing of your last words. saying goodbye to loved ones. sinking into the earth. a soul bath.

I finally found something that gave me a sound sense of self beyond my body. my story. my mind.

I found an unconditional unwavering love for myself that was completely boundless. something I can hold onto forever. a love that I want everyone to know and soak in.

What do you think is the goal or mission that drives your creative journey?

As a living funeral practitioner and death poet I founded UnderthingsLA so I could blend the feeling of rupture that is dying; with language- a coalescing of death as a foundation for meditation and my poetry as the thread.

My sole mission lies in holding space for others to surrender into their pain, truth, and find unconditional love underneath. We have a responsibility to talk about each others pain and so lessen it.

Is there something you think non-creatives will struggle to understand about your journey as a creative?

My journey as a creative being has always led me to the truth. Mostly the truth we find in ourselves is both frightening and deeply painful.

Sitting with the pain is a force no human wants; and yet it allows for an invisible release which brings peace into the heart.

Allowing myself to understand my truth, my pain and where it comes from has made me what “society” would call a late bloomer.

I’ve found even in the wellness industry there is this need to get to the top. I have no desire to climb anyone’s ladder and refuse to place value for my life on things like power, wealth, and fame.

I have solace in knowing I am much more of a being human than a doing one. I finally found love in this for myself and have been able to watch how it reaches others inside a slight hush.

Contact Info:

• Website: https://www.underthingsla.com/
• Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/pearlmadryga/

Image Credits
Brandon Simmoneau