We were lucky to catch up with Nickey Van Tooren recently and have shared our conversation below.

Hi Nickey, thanks for joining us today. Can you talk to us about a project that’s meant a lot to you?

Creating your own work as an artist is the most rewarding and physically and mentally demanding thing anyone can do. I took that challenge, and I will do it again (fixing the mistakes I made last time). I made a film that is very personal to me, and I am so proud of what it became.

The journey was chaotic. I struggled with funding, but managed to get just enough from my GoFundMe and out of my own pocket to make it a reality. Producing, writing, and acting in my own piece was a crazy combination, one that I only recommend to those who know what they are getting themselves into. I was definitely in slightly over my head. I am good at all those elements individually, but doing it all on one project, especially such a personal one, was extremely tough. Putting on many hats throughout the process left me hoping I had shared the workload more evenly.

Anyway, the film itself is called A Tough Pill to Swallow. Here’s the logline: Tempted by her desire to maintain her heterosexual facade, a lost 25-year-old must decide between taking life-altering gay conversion pills or accepting her love.

It’s a film full of tough decisions and self-discovery, and one that relates closely to my own experiences. As a kid, I was afraid to accept myself and my sexuality; I was afraid of what the world might do to me. It took a long time to accept myself. Now, I wanna share that experience and welcome people to open themselves up to the vast spectrum of sexuality. I want people to learn to accept themselves and others for who they are. I was afraid, and I understand why people today are also afraid, but I want people to know that the most important thing is to be true to yourself.

Anyway, back to filming: this project was shot across three long nights (literally night shoots from 6 pm to 6 am) in Los Angeles. Our third shoot day was on location in a Pharmacy during the early evening. Not only were we fighting exhaustion, but we were also fighting the clock. We had a lot to film in a short space of time. I had an incredible team help me (mainly), but no project comes without its hiccups. In this case, it was an individual on my team whom I trusted, and they severely let the whole team down. It happens. But I was wrecked. I believed they wanted what was best for the project, something I had put so much of my heart and soul into, but I was wrong. Luckily, everyone else stepped up—especially Marly Feigin, who took excellent control of the situation and literally saved the day.

Then came the acting. I wanted to challenge myself with this project (as if writing and producing it wasn’t enough!). I wrote a complex character for myself, one based on who I used to be but nowhere near who I am today. She was dark and fighting inner demons, while I’m much more bubbly. I could’ve made an easy choice and played the other character, one much more aligned with my current state, but I knew it would mean much more and challenge my skills much more if I picked ‘Skye’. I have no regrets.

A project has never meant so much to me as this. I’d love to explore new roles in TV and film, and I can’t wait to continue my career, but there’s something compelling and fulfilling about seeing your own work come to life. I’ll never forget it.

The film will be heading to festivals this year. I can’t wait to share it with the world.

Great, appreciate you sharing that with us. Before we ask you to share more of your insights, can you take a moment to introduce yourself and how you got to where you are today to our readers.

I’m Nickey van Tooren (she/they), an actor, writer, and producer in LA. I have an MFA in Acting for Film and have acted in commercials, music videos, and short films, with a few heading to festivals soon! Most recently, I was in a music video that reached over 24 million views on YouTube, which was an awesome surprise.

My love for acting sparked early. As a kid, I was bursting with confidence, channeling that energy into every performance. School plays led to formal training, and though I danced and sang as well, acting always called to me most. I earned my BFA in Acting in London, where I landed my first professional credits. Now, in LA with an MFA and an agent, I’m auditioning for everything from films to theater, chasing every opportunity.

I believe hard work pays off, so alongside auditioning, I keep creating my own projects. Right now, I’m writing and producing films and preparing to shoot a music video for my own song. These creative outlets fuel me, keeping my passion alive even when I’m between roles. While it may not always pay the bills, nothing compares to the satisfaction of seeing my ideas leap from page to screen. I make a point to write myself into my films, building my own path forward.

I’m passionate about creating and joining projects that truly matter, especially those with queer or feminist themes. My dream is to play a strong, empowered lesbian whose story is defined by her character, not just her sexuality.

My own music is also on my mind, and I plan to dive deeper into it soon. For now, though, my main focus is growing my acting career by connecting, collaborating, and building a vibrant creative network.

Learning and unlearning are both critical parts of growth – can you share a story of a time when you had to unlearn a lesson?

I had to rethink my approach to waiting for good things to happen. I once believed that hard work and doing your best would naturally bring rewards. Sometimes, with a bit of luck, it does. I’ve landed a few small gigs that way. But in this industry, it rarely works like that.

Growing up at a small school full of opportunities, landing roles felt easy. I worked hard, believed I deserved them, and usually succeeded. The same went for sports and music; I always played at the top level. But back then, I was one of just a few chasing those dreams.

Now, as an adult in busy, theatrical Los Angeles, I’m one of millions with the same dream. Realizing that pushed me to work harder. That’s when I understood that hoping for the best isn’t enough. I have to work really hard to succeed, and I’m okay with that.

Is there mission driving your creative journey?

I want to show my parents that all of this was worth it. They’re the most supportive parents I could ask for. They’ve always stood by me and my creative dreams, letting me take classes, attend workshops, and do shows far from home. They always told me they believed in me. But they were also realistic. They made it clear they’d always support me, even if this career didn’t work out. They never made me pick a backup plan, but they encouraged me to keep my options open just in case.

More than anything, I want my parents to know how thankful I am for everything they’ve done for me. Their support and belief have carried me through the biggest challenges, and I wouldn’t be where I am without them. I work so hard not just for myself, but also to make them proud and to show them that their belief in me really mattered. I hope every step forward I take lets them see just how much their encouragement has meant to me.

Contact Info:

• Website: https://nickeyvt.wixsite.com/nickeyvt
• Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/nickeyvt
• Linkedin: https://www.linkedin.com/in/nickeyvt

Image Credits

Jeff Burgett
Jake Stewart
Jade Radley
Gabriele Bussetti