We caught up with the brilliant and insightful Michele Fields a few weeks ago and have shared our conversation below.

Michele, thanks for taking the time to share your stories with us today One of the things we most admire about small businesses is their ability to diverge from the corporate/industry standard. Is there something that you or your brand do that differs from the industry standard? We’d love to hear about it as well as any stories you might have that illustrate how or why this difference matters.

Since 1989 I’ve practiced matchmaking as an old-fashioned matchmaker. I meet in-person, even through COVID, with each and every client to interview them. I have had a protocol in place since the beginning of the pandemic that I still adhere to for safety. Recently after an interview the client came down with meningitis and another came down with COVID.

There is a trend to conduct interviews by Zoom which is not sufficient to form an evaluation of a client. There is a trend to have a group of “matchmakers” in companies. The issue with that is there is no one at that company who has met EVERY client and interviewed them. How can you truly matchmake if you’ve never met all of the clients? Because Bon Jour Matchmaking is ME and I have interviewed EVERY client in-person and my process is collaborative, I have had tremendous success throughout the years.

Another trend is selling a package of “dates”. First of all, if they are selling “dates” they are a dating service. Unfortunately, businesses use the words dating and matchmaking interchangeably. But that is incorrect. You are either one or the other. If you are selling “dates” for a finite period of time, you are a dating service regardless of what you call yourself.

Further, there is a trend not to share profiles or pictures of potential matches. I understand why they may not show pictures because people turn down profiles more often based on pictures. But my theory is that if you are paying thousands of dollars for a REAL matchmaker, and you are making the decisions together, you should have as much information as possible to make those decisions. I share a 6-page profile and a minimum of 6 pictures of each client with prospective matches. That is why I’ve had such a high success rate.

Last, but not least, there is a trend amongst all other services that THEY select who you are going to meet. Now how can they successfully do that? They just met you! They can’t…every so often due to fate I’m sure they get lucky and things work out. But in their numerous reviews people reiterate that they were not set up with people who fit their specifications and preferences. That’s why in Bon Jour we are partners. It is totally collaborative and the client decides based upon the info I shared above, who resonates with them. I decide which profiles to share because I’ve interviewed all of the clients and it has to fit on BOTH sides. But of those, the client decides who appeals to them.

As always, we appreciate you sharing your insights and we’ve got a few more questions for you, but before we get to all of that can you take a minute to introduce yourself and give our readers some of your back background and context?

Even as a young woman, when I dated someone, I would often think who of my friends would be a better match for them. It came to me naturally. Although I’ve had jobs such as chauffeur, model, hostessing, legal secretary, press agent for a motorsport racetrack, those were jobs and not my heart. So having suffered with insomnia all of my life, I needed a more fluid schedule that I could control. Being single and looking at my own options to find a partner, the only service in 1989 was Great Expectations. So, I studied their business model and structure and found that even I would not use a service like that. But I felt that if I did the total opposite of that structure, that would appeal to me as well as other singles. What do you know, I was right! For so many years, I was the only matchmaker in Colorado until this trend caught on and now, they are popping up like weeds. But I am still the only genuinely old-fashioned matchmaker.

For 34 years I have stayed true to the old-fashioned approach…through the internet, online dating site, apps and through COVID. For the simple reason that not only does it appeal to serious minded singles looking for a life partner, but because there are just some things that, in my opinion, do not need to go tech. Matchmaking is one of those. It works best with an open-ended contract, a hands-on matchmaker and lots of information shared with clients of potential partners.

What sets Bon Jour Matchmaking apart are a myriad of qualities. I am proud of how I’ve structured my service as it is a proven commodity over 34 years. Maybe the most important aspect is the open-ended contract. I do not nickel and dime clients to death. There is a one-time investment fee paid at the time of the interview and you are a client until…until you achieve your goal, however long that may take! Additionally, there is a per-introduction fee on both sides of a match signaling that both clients have “skin in the game” and feel this is a match with potential. Male clients, in particular, appreciate that as there are some services who do not charge the women and then charge the men twice as much. So, the fact that all clients make an investment in Bon Jour really appeals to men.

The next novel aspect of my service is that I, alone, interview every client, in person. Services with multiple matchmakers do not know every client. The “matchmakers” only know the clients they personally have brought in, then they may have a weekly meeting to exchange some info and throw people together to meet a limited contract.

Another unique structure of Bon Jour is that it is so collaborative. Because I have interviewed every client, I decide who fits on both sides and then share that profile with a client. It is the client’s decision whether that person, based on the 6-page profile and pictures, resonates with them. The client always makes the final decision on who they meet.

I do periodically have clients who say, “this is the type I usually date”. Well, maybe that’s the problem. Perhaps you need to expand your criteria. Although when I dated, I had a “type”, there were a number of times I dated guys who didn’t fit that at all. Based on my friends’ very lengthy, successful marriages I have great examples of what types of qualities are the most important. So, there is a significant amount of coaching in my service. I have found that there is a lack of communication as well as misinterpretations within the first 2-3 months of dating. My expertise is to share information with both clients so as to overcome any misunderstandings and give all matches a chance for success! There are many marriages that would never have happened had I not stepped in and coached both sides of the match. So my coaching is one of the most important services that all clients receive.

What am I most proud of? The fact that almost every couple who has married through Bon Jour, married either the first or second person they met regardless of how long may have taken! That is 600+ singles (300+ marriages) over 34 years! I attribute the success to the old-fashioned structure of my service.

What’s a lesson you had to unlearn and what’s the backstory?

In the long history of success of Bon Jour I have learned that I cannot always make the decision who my clients should meet and who I should or should not share profiles with. There have been instances over many years when clients chose each other, and I was skeptical or would not have put them together, and they ended up getting married.

This story addresses both the open-ended contract and my own lesson not to decide for the client. A few years ago, I met a woman at a Pilates class. She was attractive, financially stable and fit. I gave her my card and she became a client. She selected about 5 men she had an interest in meeting, but when I shared her profile and pictures all of them declined. I have to say I was surprised because she was very appealing, I thought. Time went on and when a new male came in who fit on both sides, I shared her profile with them. For some reason they all declined. After a year and a half she still had not met anyone. Then I went to a Christmas party. There was a very attractive single man at the party. We chatted and I gave him my business card. He also became a client. He selected about 8 women he was interested in, including this woman who he put first in order of interest in meeting. So, I contacted her but she was unavailable due to extensive traveling at that time. I really didn’t think she would be interested because although they were the same age, she looked 5 years younger and he looked 5 years older. But because I’ve been a matchmaker for so long, I have learned not to make decisions for my clients!

I asked him if he would like to continue on his list until she became available or wait. He was quite interested in her, so he said he’d wait. After a couple of months she contacted me saying she was back in town and available. Again, I was thinking, she’ll probably think he looks too old…but to my surprise she said YES, she would like to meet him. So, I shared their contact info and instructions. They met on a Thursday, a day before he was going to Mexico for the weekend. He phoned me on Tuesday saying that their meeting went so well that she joined him in Mexico! Well, they were married 9 months later and are still married.

Had this woman not had an open-ended contract, she may not have been a client a year and a half later! I do not charge a larger fee for open-ended contracts. EVERY client receives that as a matter of practice.

I’ve learned that it’s important that the clients themselves make the decision…unlike most services who decide for their clients.

Can you talk to us about how your funded your business?

This is the first time in 34 years I have addressed this question. Matchmaking was so novel in 1989 that I really didn’t even consider taking out a loan or having an investor fund my venture.

Bon Jour Matchmaking Service has always been funded ONLY by me personally. It was structured to limit overhead, be old-fashioned and basic. Because of the unique and novel business model, TV, radio and print covered my business for free. So, I really have never paid for advertising. Advertising is extremely expensive, consequently, clients end up funding it by their fees. Because I’ve always wanted to keep fees reasonable, I have eliminated as much overhead as possible.

I have never paid for office space and have interviewed clients in my home office since 1989! It has always been most important to me to charge reasonable fees. This service is not focused on money…it is focused on marriages!

I have always worked alone. It is important that I get to know each and every client, not just some of them and the others brought in by other people. I am THE matchmaker in Bon Jour and know every single client. Thus, there has never been a payroll.

Every aspect that I’ve mentioned above that I have chosen not to do causes fees to increase for the clients. Although this is a life changing proposition for clients, that doesn’t mean they should have to make payments or take out a loan to join the service.

Being an old-fashioned matchmaking service has benefited clients in so many ways…the aspects of the structure mentioned previously as well as their reasonable investment because of the structure.

Contact Info:

• Website: http://bonjourms.com
• Linkedin: https://www.linkedin.com/in/michele-fields-1625934a/
• Twitter: https://twitter.com/MicheleBonJour
• Other: 303-756-8106 [email protected]