Alright – so today we’ve got the honor of introducing you to Gabrielle Burton. We think you’ll enjoy our conversation, we’ve shared it below.

Gabrielle, looking forward to hearing all of your stories today. Let’s go back in time to when you were an intern or apprentice – what’s an interesting story you can share from that stage of your career?

I went to a Christian college at Bethel University in St. Paul, Minnesota. After two of the hardest years of my life battling my mental health; I experienced the healing power of God and therapy. It was then that I knew I wanted to become a therapist. However, I didn’t want to go straight into graduate school or take a 9-5 right after graduation. So I chose to do a year of volunteer work in California at a shelter for women who were survivors of domestic violence and human trafficking. I joined a Catholic program where we took a vow to serve for a year. We were given a $200 monthly stipend to pay for any expenses. Our housing was paid for and we were given a food budget to split between the three of us, but it was tight.

I was excited to serve the women at the shelter. I was prepared to go and motivate these women to change their lives around! I was however completely humbled as I was told I wouldn’t be working with the women, but with their children. I had no interest in working with the kids. I was so upset. “I didn’t take a year off to babysit!” I thought. I was introduced to my new boss and colleagues at the childcare. It was such a tiny space, and we worked with kids from infants to 5. Each day I was so upset and had no clue why God had me there.

The women would come and drop their children off at the onsite childcare center, and they were to either be going to school or working. It wasn’t long that I found out that many of these women would drop their kids off and then hang out the whole day! One day after a long day of work, I left furious. I remember saying to God, “This isn’t fair! They aren’t doing what they are supposed to do. They are taking advantage of us.” Then I heard, “Just because people don’t uphold their end of the bargain doesn’t mean that you can’t uphold yours!”

I continued to show up and my anger slowly started turning to gratitude. I allowed myself to accept my fate and practice being more understanding. My boss had a very different approach for the children. When the kids would have meltdowns or were “misbehaving” she would send them to the “feeling center” where the kids could look at books, charts and toys that talked about their emotions. After the child calmed down, she’d go over and check in with the kids. She’d ask what they were feeling and they’d say, “I’m angry!” or “I’m sad!” Then she’d sit there and help them process their emotions. I worked in childcare before and I had never seen that approach.

On my lunch break, I would have my lunch on the patio of the house. Months into my service, one of the women came and sat down with me and she started sharing her story with me. I was completely humbled when she shared all that she had been through. I realized that it was actually a milestone for her to even be there. Many women don’t make it out of those situations or they go back. It was in that moment that I realized that God wanted to teach me the importance of allowing myself to be interrupted. Each day at lunch another women would come and share her story with me.

When my year of service was over, I was ready to move on to the next chapter of my life. I asked for the day off and my boss agreed. She ended up calling me in to work and I was so annoyed! I showed up with my hair in a bun, no make up and lounge wear. I wanted her to know how inconvenient it was that she called me in on my day off. To my surprise, my boss, my colleagues, the women and their kids threw me a going away party. The moms had made sure the menu reflected the food they observed me eat each day they joined me for lunch. And they each gave me an avocado because they noticed that I ate them almost everyday. They shared, “Gabrielle, we have had so many volunteers come through here and you have been the most kind, patient, compassionate and loving one we’ve ever had. Thank you so much for spending your year with us and loving us so well.”

Needless to say, I knew I wanted to be a therapist, but that made me become a different type of therapist. One that allows others to be where they are at, not trying to fix, but to simply be present. God is often putting us in situations to change us.

As always, we appreciate you sharing your insights and we’ve got a few more questions for you, but before we get to all of that can you take a minute to introduce yourself and give our readers some of your back background and context?

I am a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist, Speaker, Edutainer and soon to be author. I have worked in a variety of therapeutic settings from St. Jude’s Ranch for Children serving teens in the foster care system, to an Intensive Outpatient Program serving teens with chronic illnesses. I have also facilitated therapeutic retreats in Utah where attendees processed childhood trauma through psychodramas.

I specialize in supporting my clients overcome narcissistic and spiritual abuse. I also love working with creatives. I am a creative at heart and use various art mediums with my clients from music, drawing to movement. I have spoken at several conferences, hosts workshops, and creates content on social media about mental health and faith.

I refer to myself as a “Gold Digger” as I believe everyone has wealth and value and won’t stop until my clients discover the hidden treasures they possess within. I am in the process of releasing my first book entitled “The Ultimate Guide to becoming a Gold Digger: Discovering the hidden treasures within.” In it, I combine biblical principals and mental health.

In my spare time, I enjoy singing, dancing, photography, working out, taking road trips, and reading a good book. I used to sing with a Grammy-Award Winning Singing Ensemble called the Sounds of Blackness and released a single entitled “Playing Dead” streaming on all music platforms. I am passionate about raising up and equipping others by empowering them to overcome their insecurities and fears through creative expression.

Can you tell us about a time you’ve had to pivot?

During the pandemic, I wasn’t sure if the job I was in would still be available the following school year. All the kids were sent home and I was doing zoom counseling sessions with kids, but it wasn’t very often. I decided that it might be a good time to explore another job opportunity because I had a feeling kids wouldn’t be coming back to school for a while.

I ended up taking a job in California at an Intensive Outpatient Program. From the very beginning, it was not the easiest staff to get along with, I experienced a lot of bullying in the workplace and was isolated and unsupported. I was so confused because I was working with a team of mental health professionals and yet the mental and emotional abuse was relentless.

Well, come to find out, God was having me have to address my childhood wound of being a child of a narcissist. I found myself graveling and wanting to gain the acceptance of my peers and boss. I found myself second guessing my abilities and choices. I even ended up losing hair and having health issues from all the stress.

My boss, in true narcissistic fashion, told me that I needed to go to therapy because I wasn’t a safe place for my clients. I wasn’t above therapy, I actually agreed! The work environment was giving me a ton of anxiety. I ended up finding the most amazing therapist and we did some serious inner child work. As she and I dug deeper into my trauma, I realized that I walked right into this situation thinking I could change the narcissist. As I got healthier, I realized I wasn’t the problem.

I remember feeling like I needed the job since I packed up everything to move to California from Vegas. And I had no clue how I would support myself if I left. I’d tell myself, “This is what a responsible adult does. They get a big girl job, with benefits. So what it doesn’t make you HAPPY? It’s a job.”

As I was getting healthier, I knew I needed to prepare to leave. I looked into my 401K, and how much vacation time I had. Leaving a toxic job is a lot like leaving an abusive relationship, you don’t want to leave without an exit plan. My language began to shift because I was becoming more confident. I looked myself in the mirror and said, “What responsible adult compromises their health for money? You don’t NEED this job!” And I started to believe it.

One day, my job did something super unethical and I decided to leave right on the spot. It was sooner than I had anticipated but a switch flipped and I had to leave. Every day after that was a complete roller coaster. Some days I was so proud of myself, and other days I cried and had no clue how I would pay my bills. My therapist was a God sent and was there every step of the way. She gave me FREE sessions because I didn’t have an income.

Little by little, I started building up my clientele. I reached back out to my colleagues in Vegas, and they started sending me telehealth clients. By the grace of God, He supplied my every need. During this season was when I wrote my single entitled “Playing Dead.” Sometimes we have to go through difficult seasons, but even gold has to go through fire to be purified.

We often hear about learning lessons – but just as important is unlearning lessons. Have you ever had to unlearn a lesson?

A lesson I had to unlearn is that I can’t fix people. It’s not my job.

I grew up with an on and off single mom, and when I say on and off I mean, she’s been married and divorced 6 times. Growing up, we moved around every six months, and I’ve had more first days of school than anyone I know. I grew up very fast and felt responsible for everyone around me. From a young age, I had wisdom beyond my years and was always the go to person for advice. It was such a gift, but I never felt like I could have an off day because everyone needed me to keep it together.

In doing my own therapy, I had to learn to let go of feeling the need to help or fix people. It’s been such a freeing realization. One I’m constantly have to keep reminding myself. Naturally people want me to help them, but I have to keep my love on and boundaries firm. I am a human first, and a therapist second and ONLY to my clients.

Contact Info:

• Website: https://www.gabriellemburton.com
• Instagram: @gabrielleburtontherapy
• Youtube: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qkvBUZMUMx8