Today we’d like to introduce you to Simone Muschett
Hi Simone, we’d love for you to start by introducing yourself.
90’s baby. Brooklyn born. Raised from West Indian culture. First generation college student. First in my family to pursue and secure a career. A holder of 3 degrees and a current doctoral student. One would never guess that I also struggled with mental health. The 3rd grade was the first time I self-injured. I had already begun the narrative that no one really cares about me. Being a child who felt unseen and unheard I basked in the positive affirmations from my teachers and mentors along the way. School was my escape from the depressive and anxious thoughts I often felt growing up when I was at home.
Exposure to extra-curricular actives, such as debate team, dance, gospel choir, school plays were protective factors that provided me a safe place to explore who I was. Perhaps, due to my own journey, I have always had interests in working with children. First I wanted to be a doctor, then a child psychologist, became a teacher under the pressure and advice of family; however, I landed in Social Work because, as an educator, I cared too much about my students overall wellbeing. When I see young people hurting, I think about my childhood and my desire to be seen and immediately realized that I want to be the safe space for youth that I needed at their age. This lead me to pursue social work and start my own non-profit in which I could teach youth how to be resilient through the traumatic moments that happen when life is doing what it does. Now I have dedicated my life to not only creating safe spaces for youth, but also their families. I uncovered that parents are not able to communicate honestly and respectfully to their children because they are merely repeating the treatment they received growing up.
Can you talk to us a bit about the challenges and lessons you’ve learned along the way. Looking back would you say it’s been easy or smooth in retrospect?
People pleasing is the largest obstacle I still struggle with today. First discovering, admitting an accepting I am a people pleaser revealed itself first in a toxic and abusive romantic relationship that I was in for about 12 years, since the age 16. This person did not want me to socialize with friends, he did not like if I did business with other males, he would not go outside with me and often made me chose between him and my relationship with God.
The second time people please showed up, was recently at my 9-5. After working excessive hours, taking on large projects outside of my job description; burnout and exhaustion showed up in my life to let me know I was taking on too much. My weight dropped and my physical health declined. Over this three year journey of being in crisis working some place where I was being taken advantage of and I was not happy that I learned how I arrived in the position in the first place. It was the lack of boundaries in the beginning. I was so excited to get the role that I wanted to impress my boss and eventually became addicted to compliments and “well done!” that when I stopped receiving, because I started to say “no” to extra assignments, I had a meltdown. The meltdown showed me that if people always want you to what they want and never do what you want they are not for you. I began to pick up on patterns of everyone in my circles. I took inventory and realized that 90% of the relationships I had, whether friendships, romances, colleagues, I somehow always assimilate to what they want without consideration of what I want.
To go deep I learned the flaw stemmed from childhood. Because I felt unseen, I wanted so, bad to be noticed that Iw Ould do everything I could to make my mom proud. I have an insecure attachment style. When my mom was upset, she would project her anger out to me, so I would do things to try to make her feel better. She was nicer when she was in positive mood. But most importantly, I hoped that she would love me if she could see that I was enough to make her happy. This mind blowing revelation taught me that I did not know me. I didn’t know what Simone enjoyed. I didn’t know how to advocate or stand up for myself. My focus has always been making others feel comfortable because I felt like such a nuisance to my family, classmates, boyfriends and colleagues to the extent that I attempted to take my life twice.
Making self-love a priority is how I am now a recovering people pleaser. Sometimes we have to let people go. I learned that it is okay to decline invitations to places I did not feel comfortable in. It is okay to let go of relationships where my needs are not being met. There is power in saying ” No”. There is power in your voice. Once I discovered my voice, discerning who is for me and who wants to take from me became clear.
As you know, we’re big fans of Resilient Young Minds Incorporated. For our readers who might not be as familiar what can you tell them about the brand?
Resilient Young Minds Incorporated ( RYM Inc.) is my 501c3 non-profit organization that aims to teach youth and families how to fight trauma with resilience to access healing. In order for this to be done, I create a safe space for trauma storytelling I call ” Resilience Camp”. The camp is a 2-3 day weekend experience that challenges participants to engage in therapeutic activities that allow them to reflect on their personal, professional and social experiences in a different way. The goal is to identify, share, release and reflect on a traumatic moment that is stopping you from moving forward in your life in some way.
RYM Inc. has been in operation for the last 7 years and have served over 110 people for our camps and over 200 people at our Suicide Awareness Walks. My niche is demonstrating to people how trauma storytelling fosters the human connection required to be resilient and access healing through the story telling of my own traumas. This method has inspired students from ages 6 to adults up to age 64 to use their voice to release and request what they need, so that they can be resilient.
Before we go, is there anything else you can share with us?
You grow through what you go through. God showed me that I had the life I had because my assignment on this earth is to fill in the gaps where parents have fallen short emotionally or physically and have left a stain on their child. Or perhaps a stain was left on them. The ultimate goal is to break the generational cycle of suppressed trauma. When we internalize our emotional pain it can manifest in our bodies physically. Therefore, if you love yourself and you recognize that you may be dealing with depression, burnout or anxiety as a result of a major change or adversity in your life, take the time to identify, share, reflect and release. Or simply sign-up for the next RYM Resilience Camp, I will take care of you. Your mind matters. Your mental heath matters. You matter.
Contact Info:
- Website: https://linktr.ee/simoneemuschett
- Instagram: @poetic_j21
- Youtube: https://www.youtube.com/@IamTheUltimateSocialWorker
