We’re excited to introduce you to the always interesting and insightful Carmalita Af. We hope you’ll enjoy our conversation with Carmalita below.

Alright, Carmalita thanks for taking the time to share your stories and insights with us today. Can you open up about a risk you’ve taken – what it was like taking that risk, why you took the risk and how it turned out?

This past spring, I went on a cross country roadtrip with my dear friend, Jenea who is a big sister to me. She’s a huge traveler and explores the most beautiful places all over the world. When Jenea shared her mapped-out itinerary of an adventurer’s dream cross-country road trip filled with hiking, glamping, sleepovers and exploration–I was happy to tag along. I had driven cross-country alone once, but didn’t get a chance to stop and explore between Los Angeles and New York. This time around, I was eager to be both driver and rubber-necking passenger.

Bryce Canyon National Park in Utah was on Jenea’s bucket list. When she said we’d go horseback riding through the Canyon, I had no expectation. I rode a horse in a circle a few times in high school and didn’t remember having much fear, so I figured it’d be a little cutesy thing like that. I prefer to go into some situations blind, because with too much information I can spook myself out of an experience. At our arrival, we discovered that we (as novice riders) were to ride sure-footed mules as horses are not as easy to steer. I really just wanted a cute horse-top photo but was cool with my new mule friend.

I knew the excursion could be risky…one slip or misstep of the mule’s hoof, and down into the beautiful rocky abyss I go. The depths in some of the canyon reach 1,000 feet. Heights are not my favorite, nor were they my friend’s. But together we went, mule in front of mule–through the beautiful orangey hoodoos.

The trail was over three hours long and I spent most of it in fear a bit. I used it as a time to feel gratitude, repeat affirmations in my head, encourage my nervous system, and my nervous friend as we overcame our fear of heights. When I heard her worrisome voice behind me as her mule nipped at my mule’s tail and sent both of us rocking, I did my best to reassure her we’d be okay. I did this while at times full-body clenching as I flinched and jerked my mule’s reigns away from the very close edge we were nearing. The risk was getting on top of a large animal and trusting it would lead me through high rocky, narrow heights. But the reward was spending hours in awe of the beauty nature can create, while reassuring my body it was safe. I touched parts of the earth I didn’t know existed, and I thanked whoever was listening.

Carmalita, before we move on to more of these sorts of questions, can you take some time to bring our readers up to speed on you and what you do?

I’m a writer. While I work on my personal projects, I am physically active doing things that bring me joy while helping others. I grew up playing sports but I never found something I excelled in. I spent whole summers at the city pool and always wanted to be a swimmer but there was no swim-team in my little Ohio town. I tried plenty other sports, though. I played basketball, ran cross country, threw shot put, cheered, and danced. From pee-wee cheerleading to throwing javelin in college, I was just happy to be part of a team. I loved wearing uniforms and learning different skills, going to practices, traveling with the team and having folks to cheer you on during an event or performance. Before I had the language for it, I knew I thrived in community wellness.

After graduating college over a decade ago, I struggled to find ways to be active while not on a team. Taking fitness classes was how I incorporated fitness into my life outside of organized sports. I found there was much less pressure when everyone is doing their own thing, but together. Age never mattered in any of the classes, only physical ability and that you showed up for yourself that day.

Presently, I am leaning into my love of teaching swimming lessons and instructing cycling classes as way to support folks in my community. After a season of grief, I began making a living in ways that regulate my nervous system. Getting to offer a service to others while also taking care of my own body has been instrumental in my well-being.

I don’t think you have to be the best at any of the things you try, as long as you’re trying your best. Sometimes my best is just showing up to support other people, and I get to do that as an instructor.

Even though I enjoy working out, I am just not as motivated to do things alone. I know that’s the case for many folks. So, I curate my classes based on how I’d like them to be. I sneak in motivational songs and poems into my playlists. I mash them with booty-shaking pop songs, 90’s R&B and feel-good dance music. When teaching swim lessons, I cater based on what I can learn from the student’s personal strengths and needs. Some kids get in the water and are fearless rockstars. Others need a little coaxing, or a few extra sing-along-songs. Some adults just need to be listened to. Others have the basics, and they just need a little assistance here and there for form that improves swim-stroke.

I think about the kind of coaching and teaching that would have benefited me as a child and athlete. For me, this is how we heal in community.

Swim-instructing is one of the most fulfilling services I provide. I encourage parents to be confident and trust themselves and their children in the water, and when they can’t–I let them know that I’ve got them! Seeing a child go from not wanting to dip a toe in the pool, to submerging to the bottom of three feet of water to retrieve a toy, is joy-inducing. I get to be a key part of someone learning/improving the skill of swimming, which is truly a privilege.

I also facilitate sound baths. I just want to help folks take care of their bodies. Whether it’s leading them through an intense work-out with a playlist I love jamming out to, or encouraging body-calmness while playing singing bowls to resting bodies. I just want people to know that it is possible to regularly calm our bodies from life’s stressors. My hope is that I encourage folks to love on their bodies by leaning into their community wellness resources.

How about pivoting – can you share the story of a time you’ve had to pivot?

Most of my adulthood has been about navigating life’s various pivot points. In 2019, I was exploring the kind of life I wanted to live post-divorce. All the things I dreamt of doing, I did. That included backpacking through Europe, exploring different parts of the US and going on a wellness retreat in West Africa. I was two years into a four-year travel stretch when I decided to leave Los Angeles and move north of Houston. During that trip, I decided to be a vagabond writer. My plan was to hang out with one of my friends from college, maybe work at a coffee shop and work on my book. A few weeks in though, I landed a full-time job as a grant writer at a nonprofit organization.

They provided services for domestic violence and rape victims. I wrote a few things that pleased the department and expressed interest in getting to know multiple areas of the organization. My supervisor at the time was pleased with my work but saw that I looked miserable cramped inside my office. I was encouraged to write wherever made me happy, even if it was at a park. My emotional support animal came to the office with me and things seemed to be going pretty well for the first few months. I visited the local alternative school to teach children about healthy boundaries and language around consent. I went to the women’s shelter and spoke to the women and listened to their stories. I also chose to be on-call for assault survivors, and went to the hospital to provide information on available services. I felt good doing something I felt passionate about while also being able to use my writing skills. That is until the pandemic happened and we all had to pivot. It was a challenging because everything seemed scary in 2020. Thankfully, my pivot-game is strong and I navigated being single and living alone for the first time in my adult-life like a champ.

I eventually solely started taking my own writing clients. Ghost-writing/editing helped sustain my life for some time, but I found that writing in those ways did not bring me as much joy as I had anticipated. So, I pivoted until I found steady footing and made my way back to Los Angeles.

I believe I am always pivoting. As often as I can, I try to do what feeds me. Right now, the pivot has led me to being a fitness/swim instructor and lifeguard. Until my next pivot, I am leaning into this season the of helping others while also helping myself.

Are there any books, videos, essays or other resources that have significantly impacted your management and entrepreneurial thinking and philosophy?

The resources with the biggest impact on my professional philosophy are mostly rooted in “better-thinking” ideology and having a consistent somatic practice. Florence Scovel Shinn’s, “The Game of Life and How to Play It”, was a game-changer for me when I moved to LA, 11 years ago. Since then, works by Louise Hay and Esther/Abraham Hicks have really resonated with the kind of thinking I’d like to lead with when considering an entrepreneurial philosophy. The other large impacts for me are watching folks in my community pursuing their professional passions and thriving in their perspective fields. I find it extremely motivational to have peers succeeding who are at eye-level with me. It lets me know what is possible.

I have found that what you know and what you can do matter very little without learning to regulate your body and nervous system first. I want to be in the business of making taking are of myself as much a priority as running a business. Resources I have found helpful to do so include: talk-therapy, somatic therapy, life-coaching, acupuncture, massage and eating a diet that works for my body.

My entrepreneurial thinking and philosophy are rooted in the idea that taking care of my mind and body are most important. Directly after, I can focus on the ways I personally can support my community while also making a living.

Contact Info:

• Website: https://www.carmalitaaf.com
• Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/carmalitaaf/
• Youtube: https://www.youtube.com/@carmalitaaf