Today we’d like to introduce you to Namisa Mdlalose Bizana

Hi Namisa, so excited to have you with us today. What can you tell us about your story?

I grew up in post apartheid Cape Town, South Africa. My family moved to an area that was previously a “whites only” area. So we were one of the few families of color who lived there. I never saw a lot of kids who looked like me or spoke my home language. I always felt out place but I found a place in storytelling. I loved watching movies- obsessed! my favourite movies where Liar Liar starring Jim Carrey and Hook starring Robin Williams. I would watch these movies every weekend. It got so bad my parents eventually started hiding the tapes! anyway, on this one particular Saturday, I woke up before my family, made myself breakfast and put on Hook, like every other Saturday. But this one was a little different. I was around 6/7 years old at the time and so the question “what do you want to be when you grow up?” must have been swirling in the recesses of my mind. I had this epiphany, I realised that the people in the television were telling a story. I saw adults and children. It occurred to me that this could be a persons occupation. I just knew that thats what I wanted to do for the rest of my life. It sparked something in me that I’ve held onto for 23years now.

My family wasn’t wealthy so we couldn’t afford for me to take lessons or extra classes or anything like that but I took every opportunity I could to perform. My mom signed me up to an agency, so I started working pretty early. Mostly commercials and television. I wasn’t introduced to theatre until 7th grade and then i made that my goal. To be in every school play I possibly could and if I wasn’t cast in something, I wrote and directed something of my own. I stayed involved. I knew that I wanted to study theatre so I just made sure that every subject, every extra curricular activity would look good on an application. I took everything far too seriously!

When I got to college, my obsession almost landed me in an institution. I had these irrational expectations of myself, I was so afraid of failure but I managed to graduate from the University of Cape Town with a BA in theatre and performance with specialisation in Theatre Making. I left college with no clue with what I was going to do but I needed money so started auditioning and I got into a musical and then I got into another and another until the pandemic. In the pandemic I got married. My husband go accepted at the Berklee College of Music and so we packed up our things and moved to United States in January 2021. I couldn’t work or earn money so I stayed home which was pretty depressing but I had a lot to work through. I didn’t realise how burnt out I was by the life I had created and the expectations I had made. It took the world shutting down before I could give myself the grace to do the same thing. I found joy again. I found peace again. I found out who I really was. I used to feel as though my worth was attached to how much I could produce. If I had gone into the American industry that way, it would have killed me. I eventually got my papers, got signed to my agency ASA. I started getting booked, In fact, I am currently on an Amtrak on my way to do a performance this weekend. It took 4 years to get here again and I am only just getting started.

I’m sure it wasn’t obstacle-free, but would you say the journey has been fairly smooth so far?

Haha! Absolutely not. I would say my biggest struggle was me and the lies I was believing about myself; who I was and what I was made for. My work was my worth. I was operating out of fear and not joy. The work I was producing was good but i was never satisfied, always berating myself. I was never happy. Even when I won a pretty prestigious award back home, I was immediately thinking of the next thing. What I had was never enough. I was running myself into the ground and calling it ambition. Unfortunately, my anxiety has done well for me on paper, in that regard it has served me but at what cost. I was just so empty.

Appreciate you sharing that. What else should we know about what you do?

Gosh, well I have degree in theatre making (a degree where you learn to put up your own work, we did a bit of everything, set design, costume design, puppetry, acting, writing, directing, producing etc.) I loved every bit of devised work. I love the process of it. It feels like I can bring my entire self to a project so thats where I really come alive. I love residency’s and workshops. I love talking about the work and love developing projects. I’d say having a degree that allowed me to. see beyond acting has set me apart as an actor. My world is open. I am used to adapting and I try to remain flexible. In fact, I’ve learnt that obstacles are actually the vehicle of good storytelling. Using what you have and not what you wish you had, makes it/you interesting. I try to lean into that but better said than done, I guess.

I am pretty proud of two workshop performances I did this year. Earlier in the year I had the opportunity to do a residency at Brown University with a few South African makers and I walked away feeling almost marked by that performance. It had been a number of years since I had made work like that and so it felt daunting but I walked away feeling like I still got it! And very recently I just originated a role in a workshop musical, which has been a dream of mine.

Is there a quality that you most attribute to your success?

– a good sense of humor (being fun to work with)
– dependable/ reliable (being prepared)
– a willingness to be vulnerable with the work
– a willingness to grapple
– open mindedness

Contact Info:

• Website: https://www.namisamdlalose.com
• Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/namisamdlalose/?hl=en
• Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/namisa.mdlalose