We caught up with the brilliant and insightful Vincent White a few weeks ago and have shared our conversation below.
Vincent, thanks for taking the time to share your stories with us today Can you talk to us about a project that’s meant a lot to you?
The most meaningful project that I’ve worked on is my (now published) memoir entitled: “Finding Chris, My Father”. It is a coming-of-age story about my life growing up in Richmond, Va. dealing with fatherlessness and loss of identity. Growing up, my “father” was a habitual offender, so he was in and out of jail/prison. My mother wanted to protect him, told me that he was in school; and use to bring me to see him frequently over the years (until I figured out that he wasn’t). At the age of 16, she sat me down and told me that he wasn’t my biological father… I won’t give away the whole story, but there were a lot of twists and turns that eventually happened, and the story is like a movie. Why this project is meaningful is that I ended up finding my biological father much later, and wrote the book. Externally, everyone wanted me to write this book; however, my close family members didn’t want me to do so for fear that it would shed a negative light on them. Something kept telling me to do so anyway because I had a feeling that it’d have a mighty impact (which it did). Fast forward, the book was selling all across the world, I turned it into a traveling stage play with all sold-out shows, and those very same people that doubted or worried about my releasing it finally understood my reasoning for going forward.
Vincent, before we move on to more of these sorts of questions, can you take some time to bring our readers up to speed on you and what you do?
I am born and raised in Richmond, Virginia (and parts of my upbringing are in Chesterfield County). I have a Master’s degree in Education and an executive certificate in Business Management. I am truly the definition of a jack of all trades. I’ve always had my hands in everything; and it always has to be something that will be impactful to the culture, society, or community. I am currently a social worker working in foster care, a national orator, and a full-time father (with full custody of my 16-year-old son), I host socially impactful events around my city, and I’d like to think that I inspire others in everything that I do or touch. I got into all of this simply by living my life, trusting my God, being resilient, and having the fortitude to press on regardless of what obstacles I may face. After my life story went public, and the books/stageplays started going up, everyone wanted me to speak at their events. I started to travel with speaking engagements and started my own LLC to better manage my products/services (VEW Enterprises). I do consultation work, curate/host events, sell products, speaking engagements, and more. I also do social impact investing in small black-owned businesses; which really excites me. My brand and work are all about going where I can be the most impactful in the lives of others and doing so successfully.
Let’s talk about resilience next – do you have a story you can share with us?
My son is 16 years old. His mother and I split somewhere between his 1st and 2nd birthday, and since then I’ve gone through ongoing legal custody battles (approaching 15 yrs now). I’ve gone through hell, dragged through the wringer, had false accusations (all unfounded), public scrutiny, and more, and ultimately ended up coming out successful each time. In 2015 a judge awarded me shard 50/50 custody, and then in 2019, another judge awarded me full custody. My son has continued to thrive while in my care for many years, and while it was an uphill battle that tormented me for a very long time, I’m beyond thrilled to know that the legal systems are now understanding the power, relevance, and importance of the active black father in the lives of their children. Since being in my care, my son has thrived more now than ever. He’s doing well in school, doesn’t have the medical issues that he use to have, is working, and is following in my footsteps of being impactful upon everyone that he comes across. I’m so proud of him! The resiliency of my deciding to never give up on him and continuing to fight for him (as well as my rights as a father), is what I’m most proud of; and the psychologically and emotional scars that I’ve endured are worth it as long as he comes out further along in life than I have and he ends up successful.
We often hear about learning lessons – but just as important is unlearning lessons. Have you ever had to unlearn a lesson?
I had to unlearn the notion that you have to get the approval of certain folks in order to take action or go fulfill a mission that you’re on. Sometimes you may hesitate on making moves because such and such didn’t think it was a good idea at the time. The reality is, as long as God or the Most High has given you the go-head to move on it, then that’s all the permission that’s needed. Don’t let the gatekeepers, and the folks that can’t see your vision, stop you from fulfilling it.
Contact Info:
- Website: https://richmond.com/news/local/making-a-difference-area-foster-care-advocate-vincent-ellis-white-uses-his-own-journey-to/article_3885e808-d1fd-52a5-8e0d-620007553538.html
- Instagram: @vincentelliswhite
- Facebook: Vincent Ellis White
- Linkedin: Vincent Ellis White
- Twitter: @vinceelliswhite
Image Credits
Richmond Times Dispatch Zane Robinson Bloom Photography, LOL. Jackie Walker Vincent Ellis White