Meet Vernita Howard-Council

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Sed ut perspiciatis unde.

Today, we’d like to introduce you to Vernita Howard-Council. Vernita was introduced to us by the brilliant and talented Shonte Youmans.

Vernita, thank you so much for joining us today. We’d love for you to bring our readers up to speed – can you introduce yourself and share your story?
I was raised in the country, in a little white house. I lived with my parents, with their laughter and soft words, built a sanctuary of love that enveloped me from the day I was born. It was a two-family home, brimming with the warmth of shared meals and fun times. I grew up believing that love was invincible, a fortress that could weather any storm.

When I began dating in my teens, I thought I’d found my own fortress. He was charming but goofey. I fell head over heels, envisioning a future laced with laughter and love, the kind I’d known as a child. So, when he proposed to me, my heart sang in joyous harmony—a dream come true.

But as our wedding day approached, the shimmering facade began to crack. He had a darker side—one that erupted in anger and jealousy far too often. The first time he raised his hand, I was caught in a whirlwind of confusion. It shattered my perceptions of love. I remembered the lessons from our wedding counseling sessions, where submission was heavily emphasized, equating it with being a good wife. How could I reconcile those teachings with the growing fear gnawing at my soul?

I lost my sense of self in a bid to keep our family together. All I wanted was to build a home full of love for my daughters—the kind I cherished as a child. I wanted to give them the security of having both parents under one roof.

But in the haze of denial, I often ignored the glaring truth: He was breaking me. The spark in his eyes fled, replaced by a coldness that frequently shifted into violence. He lied, he cheated, and he vowed that I was the one who drove him to it. Confusion became my constant companion, and with every bruise, I learned to mask the pain with smiles, desperately trying to maintain the image of a perfect family.

As the years passed, my heart felt heavier; I loved my daughters fiercely but feared for their future. I watched them grow, wishing for a different path for them—one filled with laughter, not tears. But I felt trapped, paralyzed by the very advice I once admired: the notion of submission was turning me into a punching bag, shackled to a man who distorted my vision of love.

One fateful night, after yet another brutal confrontation where I found myself on the kitchen floor, my resolve started to crumble. I clutched my daughters, soothing them to sleep under a quilt of fear, and as they drifted off, I questioned everything I ever believed. Tears streamed down my face—how could I teach them the beauty of love when I was living a nightmare?

Despite the endless cycle of abuse, she clung to the promise of love, just as she had witnessed growing up.

The darkest moment came when she lost her son—an unimaginable tragedy that broke her into fragments. As she laid in that sterile hospital bed, grief wrapped around her like a suffocating shroud, she realized that God had taken the very thing she held dear in an act of divine intervention.
It was a jarring awakening that shifted her perspective entirely. This was no longer about enduring—it was about liberation.

It was then, amidst my shattered dreams that clarity struck me like a bolt of lightning. I didn’t have to submit; I could rise. As I packed small bags for my daughters and me, I felt an ember of hope ignite. The next morning, I drove away from that house, leaving behind the echoes of abuse and fear, vowing to forge a new path—one that led toward healing and empowerment.

God had clearly seen my pain and transformed my story; I didn’t need to remain silent. In my vulnerability, I found strength, and my mess became my message. I began sharing my story with other women in similar situations, helping them reclaim their voices. Together, we built a community that challenged the norms of submission and praised the resilience and beauty of independence.

With every tear I cried, I was reclaiming my power. My daughters blossomed in a home that reverberated with laughter, joy, and the strength of a mother who found her way back to love—this time, a love founded on respect, not fear.

In the years to come, I taught them that love should never hurt, that true partnership requires mutual respect, and that they, too, were worthy of a love that lifted them up. My heart swelled as I watched them grow into strong, independent women, knowing they would never have to settle for anything less than they deserved.

Through it all, I learned that healing is a journey, not a destination. During my healing journey, I rediscovered my worth and the powerful influence of using my voice. God had taken my mess—my struggles, my pain—and turned it into a resounding message of strength and hope.

Month

Years passed, and with the dawn of new beginnings, I met my husband, Wallace. He is steadfast and patient, a man who treats me with the kindness I thought I would never experience again. With him by my side, I began to rebuild the vision God has given me—not just for me, but for others who had faced similar trials. With the notion of creating a safe place for those seeking refuge from their own storms.

That dream manifested into a nonprofit called SWAT—Survivors With A Testimony —where they would offer resources, and a community for men, women, and children affected by abuse. I have poured my heart into the organization, sharing my story not as one of defeat, but as a testament to resilience. Through workshops, support groups, and outreach programs, SWAT became a beacon of hope for many.

As I stand before a room full of women and men, sharing the transformative journey from darkness to light. The burden I had carried for too long now turned into a source of strength. I became not just a survivor, but a warrior, advocating for those who felt lost.

We’ve heard great things about your organization. For our readers who might not be as familiar, can you please tell them about the organization?
Survivors with a Testimony Inc. (S.W.A.T. Inc.) is a non-profit organization based in North Carolina & Indiana whose mission is to put a STOP to the varied forms of domestic abuse in our community by providing support services such as education and advocacy to survivors and families. We have successfully assisted over 100 families in breaking free from abusive situations, providing them with the resources needed for housing, employment, and a fresh start. What distinguishes us is that many board members have personally experienced abuse, fostering a deep sense of compassion and commitment to ensuring that justice is achieved for all survivors. We also provide a vital support system for men who have faced abuse, offering them a safe space to share their experiences.

So, as we mentioned to our audience earlier, you were introduced to us by Shonte Youmans and Fresh Start Consulting LLC and we really admire them and what they’ve built. For folks who might not be as familiar, can you tell them a bit about your experience with Fresh Start Consulting LLC.
Shonte plays a vital role as an engaged committee member of SWAT, excelling in her communication skills. As a survivor, she brings invaluable insights and resilience to the team. Her dedication is evident through her generous contributions of time and support to the organization.

Establishing a relationship with Shonte is a powerful alliance designed to influence the GLOBE and expand the organization it’s GLOBAL.

The goal is to develop a strategy to transform SWAT into a globally recognized brand that resonates with the mission by focusing on educating and empowering men, women, and children to combat domestic violence effectively.