We caught up with the brilliant and insightful Tumkeen a few weeks ago and have shared our conversation below.

Tumkeen, appreciate you joining us today. Can you open up about a risk you’ve taken – what it was like taking that risk, why you took the risk and how it turned out?

I was a mother of six, hiding inside the fortress of my home. No judgement in this sanctuary… no one’s but my own. Here, I was away from the world out there. In here, no one was going to judge me for my debilitating anxiety or depression. In here, I was safe from the outside world. A world where people connected with words and laughter. Parties, lunches and a coffee out with a friend. It was a world I knew nothing about because I felt uncomfortable in it. An unbelonging. And yet it seemed enticing. What would it be liked to be known and recognized for pursuing a passion. I was safe at home, yes. But I was also suffocating. Choking back on the dreams I had for myself of being a published author, the dream to write words that would be read by others, the dream to have drive and success. One afternoon, while sitting under the weight of feeling discontent and incomplete, I was scrolling on my social media. Endlessly. When I came across an open call for submission to write for a blog for mothers. It seemed perfect. In all these years, if there was something I was experienced in, it was motherhood. It was a risk, though. To step out of the words I had been writing in my notes app for years. And put them out into an unknown, uncomfortable world. People would know me. Want to know me. They would judge my thoughts and like my post… or not. It was risking the security of my familiar world and stepping into the light. It was believing in myself at some base level. But enough to write out words, hit the submit button, and then amplify words out into a world that seemed vast and strange. But I couldn’t not do it either. It felt like the gnawing in my soul to want more was a calling. And I answered.
I wrote out a post and hit the submit button. Not believing I would get a call back but enjoying the win of stepping out of my comfort zone. But it turned out more than that. I went from a contributing writer to an award-winning, bestselling author. And it began with a risk I was scared to take but took it anyway.

Tumkeen, love having you share your insights with us. Before we ask you more questions, maybe you can take a moment to introduce yourself to our readers who might have missed our earlier conversations?

I am an award-winning, bestselling author and poet. I am also a contributing writer for Detroit Mom, and previously Lansing Mom. I’ve also been blessed to be invited to be a guest speaker for the Detroit Women’s Leadership Network annual summit; award ceremonies, and writers’ conferences.

But beyond this, I am the most proud of being a mother. They are the fire that gives me the power to soar with my words. I have always been a writer. In diaries, journals, and phone apps. I was a poet and a writer. But it was motherhood that gave me unconditional acceptance and love. And poetically so, it was when I joined the Detroit Mom team when all these opportunities began to open their doors for me. Writing about my failures, wins, and doubts about motherhood gave me a sisterhood of other mothers who said “me too” with my every word. As I began to gain confidence in my written word, I began pursuing opportunities and goals. And the more I wrote, the more feedback and support I received.

For anyone ever wanting to read about the deeply vulnerable journey of a mental health survivor who struggles with motherhood and yet is fueled by it, a woman in her midlife writing to heal and healing to write, who speaks openly about her faith and doesn’t apologize for breaking stereotypes, and all the while highlights her very human falls and victories… I am that writer. I am that poet.

Learning and unlearning are both critical parts of growth – can you share a story of a time when you had to unlearn a lesson?

There are many lessons in life we must learn from, especially avoiding situations and places in order to keep ourselves safe and protected. But not all unfamiliar things are a danger. This is something I continue to unlearn. I have had to reflect deeply whenever I’ve found myself challenged for the words I’ve written or views I’ve shared. A critic of my writing doesn’t define me and my words, and an opposing view doesn’t mean a threat or hate. They just don’t agree. For someone who’s had to break away the shell I’ve cocooned myself in for so long, it has felt very hurtful when my writing or my views have been opposed. Many times I’ve questioned whether my bruised heart and hurt feelings where a sign to retreat back into safe quarters. But I haven’t. I’ve unlearned that sense of danger or threat in order to learn that everything is a lesson. Everyone who reads and loves my work, or doesn’t, is teaching me something about myself. Whether to dis attach my words from myself or my written words from my worth. That the reaction is simply the reader’s to own, not me. And my explanation for why I wrote something belongs to me and no one else. You may take a ride with me on this train of words and lyrical pieces, and get off /stay on whenever you decide to do so. But I will continue, because it isn’t over for me until it’s over. The biggest threat isn’t those unfamiliar places of critique, questioning, and disagreement. I guess, the biggest threat is when I take the value of someone’s views to be more precious than my own.

What do you think is the goal or mission that drives your creative journey?

Well, it has definitely changed as I’ve gone on. At first, when I hadn’t written or published my book, it was “write my own book!”. As amazing as that journey has been, and humbling the reception has been to it, I feel like there’s more.

The more for me, is leaving behind a legacy with the words I put into print and leave behind in this world. When my time here comes to an end, I want to have written books that continue to inspire and motivate the generations to come. You could say, I want to plant seeds not so that I watch them grow into trees. No. I want those seeds to be a source of shade for the weary travelers and restless souls, who don’t need to know how the tree got there but rather, be grateful for it to exist. To be a source for comfort.

Contact Info:

• Website: https://tumkeen.wordpress.com/
• Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/thepoetryoftumkeen/
• Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/tumkeenwriter

Image Credits
All credits belong to Tumkeen, Writer+Poet