We were lucky to catch up with Tasneem Kagalwalla recently and have shared our conversation below.

Tasneem, thanks for taking the time to share your stories with us today. What’s the kindest thing anyone has ever done for you?

The instance that comes to mind right away, is of the year 2012.

I recall it was a cold winter afternoon as the captain landed the aircraft in Houston, Texas, USA.

This country was not entirely new to me. Several years ago, I had visited New York and hated my experience. The people, the weather, the smell of the air – everything reminded me of a time long gone by. I had memories of nothing but a broken heart and an empty pocket from back then.

That was twelve years ago.

Twelve years later, I married a wonderful man for whom Dallas was home.

As I followed suit with him, so did all those wretched remembrances from yesteryears. I just could not shrug them off.

Mechanically I answered the immigration officer’s questions. My feet ached, my head pounded, my arms were heavy with the weight of my carryon luggage.

Passport stamped, we walked to the next gate. My new home – Dallas was merely a 40-minute flight away. With every step, my life seemed more like a mirage. Home as I knew it, family, friends, familiarity, were left far behind. “I’m just a phone call away,” I had consoled my mother at the departure gate in Mumbai. Yet the same words couldn’t force a brave smile on my face right now.

At the gate, my husband asked me to be seated as he rushed off with his phone and charger. As I sat there an elderly man came up to me, smiled and asked animatedly, “That’s interesting, that thing you have on your hands, what is it? I have never seen it before.” “Henna,” I replied. “It’s beautiful, does everyone have this on their hands in your country,” he asked curiously. “Thanks, no we have it done for festivals and important occasions,” I abruptly replied. “Where are you from?” he queered on. “India,” was my terse reply. That surely ended the conversation quicker than he would have liked.

Walking over to the restroom, I looked at my watch. It had been 30 minutes. Wonder where my husband had disappeared to, I thought irritatedly. Inside a woman smiled and asked, “From India?” God! Not another one. “Yes” I sighed. “I have a friend in India,” she went on to add, cueing a conversation. I did not reply. “All the best,” she waved as she disappeared through the door. “Gosh! This bag is heavy,” I muttered under my breath as I stumbled out.

Seated at a distance was my husband, pleased, with phone in hand. “My battery was running low, so went over to the charging station,” he said. “Here, you wanna call your mother?”

In that moment, I could not help but feel overwhelmed at his kindness. My reservations seemed weak in comparison to his compassion. With tears brimming over I dropped my baggage and eagerly reached out to take the phone. As the phone rang miles across, a different bell went off in my head. The bell of realization. The bell of letting go. The bell of freedom.

“Hello ma?” excitedly I cried into the phone as an equally excited voice greeted me on the other side.

Soon after, the airline staff announced the departure of the onward flight. I walked over to the representative at the gate. My bag did not seem as heavy anymore.

I smiled and scanned my boarding pass, the lady at the gate smiled back.

Notes from my desk: “One random act of kindness is enough to change the world.”

That day, my husband (and so many strangers) bestowed me with nothing but genuine thoughtfulness.

And it changed my world.

In that moment of grateful introspection, I chose to drop my baggage.

There has been no looking back since.

Tasneem , love having you share your insights with us. Before we ask you more questions, maybe you can take a moment to introduce yourself to our readers who might have missed our earlier conversations?

If life’s experiences have taught me anything, it is that our sufferings can in fact be used as a vehicle of growth. Therefore, I am truly thankful for my struggles because without them I wouldn’t have stumbled upon my strengths.

Over the years, I worked hard on myself, tried every new theory, therapy, and home remedy whilst continually learning under expert masters and teachers. The journey was so enlightening that I decided to make it a way of life.

Today, I choose to not only help individuals overcome their challenges but also empower them to lead their best lives with authenticity and purpose.

The services I offer include:

Life Coaching: I take great pride in being the first ABNLP (American Board of Neuro Linguistic Programming) certified Master Hypnotherapist, Coach and Trainer in the state of Texas. Over 15 + years of practice, my specialization includes Teen Counseling, Relationship Coaching and Couples Therapy. Helping individuals overcome anxiety and depression are areas of interventions close to my heart too.

Training: My programs are focused on providing life skills and simple solutions for all personal or professional objectives.

What distinguishes me from others is my flexibility to unique requirements, creating tailored programs. Additionally, Nuero Linguistic Programming (NLP) is the foundation of all my training programs.

Speaker: I continually look forward to speaking engagements that create shifts in thinking or motor self-motivation. Recently on February 11th, 2023, it was my honor to be felicitated by Madrasa Burhaniyah – Dallas for educating and enabling young adults to be the best version of themselves.

My greatest rewards though, lie in the heartfelt messages and honest feedback received from clients. These testify to their pursuits of happiness and speak of their success stories. Those will always remain my biggest accolades.

What’s a lesson you had to unlearn and what’s the backstory?

I clearly remember, I was on my way to visit my parents for the first time after having made Dallas home.

It was close to midnight as the aircraft screeched onto the runway at Dubai airport. First transit point, United Arab Emirates. My second home! I had once lived here for close to a decade. I was totally thrilled to land on familiar ground.

Earlier, whilst in flight an elderly gentleman sitting next to me had requested for help with immigration and other formalities as we were both headed to India on the same connecting flight.

I settled into the lounge, my fingers twitching to get onto the phone. I had bought a local SIM card from the airport shops as there were too many friends here that I wanted to call. Excusing myself from the gentleman, I said “I’m sorry, I need to make a few calls.” Wanting my privacy, I wished he would have sat at another table.

The gentleman graciously brought over some snacks while I was busy chatting away. The phone calls never stopped. It was like a forest fire, conversations were alive, rich, and full of crackles of laughter.

“Oh! How I miss my friends,” I told the gentleman as he obediently sat in silence. As I dialed the next number; I realized I had no call credit left. “Oh No!” I cried out dejectedly. The gentleman immediately reached out and gave me his phone. “Here, use my phone.” “Are you sure? Thank you sooo much,” I excitedly replied.

I wished this time would never end as I smiled and giggled, shared, and laughed out loud. I was so happy, connecting with all my old friends. “It’s so difficult to make true friends,” I justified myself to the gentleman, in an attempt to explain my unsociability.

It was well past 2 a.m. when I hung up. “I think I’ve spoken to all of them! I really appreciate this Sir. Thank you once again,” I said, gratefully returning his phone. “No thanks required,” he responded, with eyes brimming over. “Are you ok?” I asked, startled with concern. “Yes” he said. “It brought back memories as I watched you talk to your friends. How your smile lit up your eyes, your laughter was infectious and your conversations insatiable. They are truly lucky to have you. And you them. I too had so many friends back in those days. Now most of them have moved on. You can’t call up there you see,” he grimly stated, pointing to the heavens.

We talked into the night thereafter about friends and friendships, of times gone by and yet to come. Of people, places, and different faces. It was captivating and enthralling as he shared his stories. Enraptured I listened. The onward flight announcement then seemed quite like a disturbance.

As we got up to leave, I could not take my eyes off him. As I walked alongside this frail man, I looked up at him. This time I saw someone else.

I saw a friend.

Notes from my desk: Unfortunately, my ideology on friends and friendships were skewed up until then.

That night I learned – ‘Age no bar’ is the mantra for friendships. It’s never too early or too late to make friends. Old is gold and forever shall be. New gems though are rare to find. Stop and notice them.

Allow them to touch your life. Choose to touch theirs.

Today I chose to make a new friend.

If you could go back in time, do you think you would have chosen the same profession or specialty?

Yes! A resounding YES!

This profession allows me complete use of what I have come to realize as my superpower.

For a large part of my life, I used to dislike being sensitive. I’d cry far too easily and feel people, their words and life situations far too deeply. This, I was told made me weak.

But take away that single trait, and you take away the very essence of who I am.

Over the years I learned to channel this trait effectively and thankfully today, it is my biggest strength.

As a Life Coach, it allows me to feel deeper, know better and act wiser.

It synergizes my authenticity with my life purpose whilst allowing me to honor another’s life purpose as well. What could be better than that!

Contact Info:

• Website: www.tasneemkagalwalla.com
• Instagram: @tasneemkagalwalla
• Facebook: @tasneemkagalwalla
• Linkedin: @tasneemkagalwalla
• Twitter: @TKagalwalla
• Other: Medium: @tasneemkagalwalla

Image Credits
Pic Credits: Shabbir Degani