We’re excited to introduce you to the always interesting and insightful Tammy J Cohen. We hope you’ll enjoy our conversation with Tammy J below.
Tammy J, thanks for joining us, excited to have you contributing your stories and insights. What’s the backstory behind how you came up with the idea for your business?
I am a Brand Messaging Consultant in the Gem and Jewelry Industry, the Founder of a women’s business network called Women Beyond the Table and a podcaster. I am most proud of being an author, and this is what I want to focus on for this opportunity.
When everything shut down at the beginning of the pandemic, I had the time to take stock of myself. I realized I was not very happy and needed to figure things out. Suddenly, there was all this time to go inside and look into my mindset, and I did not like what I saw. So, I began to immerse myself in programs, coursework, and seminars, learning how the mind is wired and works. I was learning about the effects of thoughts and beliefs. I was learning how much of what we believe comes into being at a very young age. It was a very enlightening time for me. I was reading books written by visionaries and leaders, and I thought I would love to share this knowledge and wisdom with my kids.
I was unsure about how to go about it; after all, my sons are grown, and even if they were all living at home, the truth is that most young people are not that interested in having in-person conversations. But everyone is vested in their phones. Everyone seems to have their phones completely accessible in hand, in their back pocket, or a bag. People are super engaged with their devices and living for the pings and distractions. It is rare to see people conversing at a restaurant; they are usually looking at their phones. I own Eighteen Restaurant on Manhattan’s Upper East Side and can vouch for this statement. LOL.
According to research, the average person checks their phone every 12 minutes, roughly 80-100 times per day, and for Gen Z Americans, it amounts to about 7 hours a day.
Texting is not new. When my sons were growing up, I texted them reminders, commands, or reprimands. This was the context for the majority of the texts that I sent them daily.
When I thought about how I communicated with them, I decided that while immersed in my personal development, growth, and spiritual journey, I would change the conversation entirely with my kids. I wanted to evolve and change how I interact with my sons. I longed to be someone they wanted to hear from. I also realized that to communicate, I would have to use the same technology that is distracting and engaging because, as noted, devices are the most accessible today, and my kids will look at their phone messages.
I began in January of 2021, sending text messages to my sons and sharing the wisdom I was learning. I was not lecturing but sharing. The messages quickly became heart-centered because I naturally included my love for them, gratitude, inspiration, and the wisdom I shared. I learned that love and gratitude are the highest-frequency vibrating energies. I knew I wanted to direct this energy to my kids, and every time I hit send, the fantastic, beautiful energy affected me, too.
As I continued to work on my development, I became accountable to my kids in my messages. I shared my mistakes and shortcomings, apologized for all the times I yelled, said, and did mean things, and wanted them to know it was never about them; it was me and my triggers and adverse reactions.
You must model it if your kids want to respect, love, and connect with you. If you want your kids to be accountable, you must be responsible and own your stuff. This is not to say you need to be best friends with your kids, but be in tune.
The most remarkable part of this journey was the transformation in my relationship with my sons. As I continued sending daily messages, they began to see me as a human with my challenges and struggles. They showed me compassion, understood my journey, and were proud of me for moving forward. This shift in our relationship was a testament to the power of consistent, heartfelt communication.
I NEVER SET OUT TO WRITE A BOOK
Honestly, it never occurred to me to publish. I just wanted to send these beautiful messages to my kids. I had to build a habit and realized this is a daily commitment, not a one-and-done, love-you-honey thing. Over time, I would tell a friend or colleague about my daily practice, and they would comment, “Wow, that is fantastic. You should write a book.” So I did.
“Text Messages To My Sons: Connecting Deeply In a World of Devices” debuted on October 4, 2023, and the response was overwhelming. I received deeply moving messages from readers who found the book profoundly resonating and inspiring. It was as if a light had been switched on, and they realized that they, too, could use text messaging to express love, inspiration, gratitude, accountability, and share wisdom. The book provided a starting point for those unsure of what to message, and they could then personalize their messages from there. The unexpected positive outcomes of my daily messaging journey inspired others to try.
It wasn’t until October 7, 2023, that I fully grasped the importance of my mission on this planet. I saw the pervasive hate, violence, misinformation, indoctrination, and propaganda that constantly bombard our kids and us through social media platforms and digital channels. This realization underscored the importance of my mission to counteract these negative influences and foster positive, meaningful connections.
A study by the Pew Research Center in 2023 highlighted that 62% of young adults aged 18-29 have encountered misinformation on social media platforms, often without the skills to distinguish between credible and false information. This exposure can create issues such as anxiety, depression, and disconnection.
In addition, research indicates that many young people in the U.S. feel disconnected from their parents. According to a survey by Springtide Research Institute, about 40% of young adults aged 13-25 report feeling lonely and disconnected from their parents and other adults. This sentiment of disconnection can negatively impact their mental health and well-being, contributing to feelings of loneliness and isolation. Furthermore, a 2023 Institute of Family Studies report found that around 35% of young adults aged 18-29 lack strong emotional bonds with their parents.
There is a ton of research, and as parents, we intuitively know there is an issue. We know that we need to make an effort to engage in communication with our kids to build stronger relationships that increase connection and weaken feelings of disconnection.
So the question is, what can we do in a society that does not foster connection, even though there are more ways to connect today than in history?
The answer is simple. Reach out to your kids wherever they are and use whatever works with no expectations. People are continuously on their phones and devices; this is a fact, so message them there, where they will pay attention and see it. Kids are not interested in having an in-person conversation for the most part, and if they happen to be present for one, they may be checked out while you are talking.
The key is having no expectations for a response back. You take it upon yourself to message love, to let your kids know how worthy they are, how incredible they are, and how blessed you feel to be their parent. You send that high-frequency energy their way, and not only will you get the energy hit when you send it, but they will receive the energy hit when they read it. Imagine how much high-frequency, beautiful energy there would be if everyone messaged these messages daily.
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My kids often do not respond to my messages, and they are not the “Mommy, I love you” type, but I know what it means to them that there is a person in their lives who cares enough to do this daily. I have spoken with parents who are upset that their kids don’t respond and that they are not going to keep messaging. My advice to them is, do not stop; this is not a conditional thing; love is unconditional. You do it to strengthen your connection to your kids. Because this will matter to them even if they act like it does not. I do not know anyone at any age or stage who does not want to know that their parent loved them and thought highly of them. I have received messages from people wishing their mothers had told them they loved them.
These beautiful messages have tremendously affected my relationship with my sons. It has mattered to them to the extent that they wrote the forward to the book, and I hope you have taken the time to read it.
I have decided to take the next step and publish an Expanded Edition of Text Messages To My Sons: A Guide to Using Mobile Devices to Connect and Communicate with Your Kids.
My mission and legacy is to start a movement to get parents and individuals to message love, inspiration, gratitude, accountability, and share wisdom daily.
After readers’ incredible response to my first book, I realized that it was just the tip of the iceberg and that I could produce a more expansive work based on feedback I received over the past year from industry experts and my audience. I want to take everything I have learned since self-publishing and improve.
I realized that I sent messages about learning, growing, improving, trying, taking chances, and failing and that I had to apply this wisdom to myself. I even asked my future self if I should go for it and produce this Expanded Edition. It takes a lot of work and resources. My future self answered, “Absolutely, this is your mission and legacy – make it the best you can.”
I hope anyone reading Text Messages to My Sons: A Guide to Using Mobile Devices to Connect and Communicate with Your Kids will be inspired to explore new ways of communicating and connecting with their loved ones, whether they are children, siblings, extended family, spouses, or friends. The impact is undeniable.
This powerful gift lies within each of us. We need to share it one message at a time.
Tammy J, love having you share your insights with us. Before we ask you more questions, maybe you can take a moment to introduce yourself to our readers who might have missed our earlier conversations?
I have been a dynamic connector throughout my career, consistently building bridges between people, ideas, and opportunities. For over 20 years, my company, TC Brand Consulting, has partnered with businesses in the gem and jewelry industry and beyond, helping clients define and articulate their mission, vision, and core values while leveraging my extensive networks to enhance brand credibility.
This natural talent for connecting led me to seek opportunities to help women thrive and achieve exponential growth. In January 2021, I founded Women Beyond the Table, a vibrant virtual network and community dedicated to accelerating professional success and personal development.
Expanding my role as a connector, I launched the Women Beyond the Table—Beyond the Table Podcast, using my ability to engage audiences by sharing my guests’ powerful stories and insights.
I am fortunate to be an award-winning author. My first book, Text Messages to My Sons: Connecting Deeply in a World of Devices, received The BookFest award, a CIPA EVVY Award, and was a finalist in the Next Generation Indie Book Awards. Through this work, I discovered my mission: to help parents transform conversations and foster deep connections with their children in a simple yet meaningful way. This mission has led me to publish (April 2025) a follow-up expanded edition, Text Messages to My Sons: A Guide to Using Mobile Devices to Communicate and Connect With Your Kids.
I am a frequent podcast guest and have been featured in various media outlets. I speak on topics ranging from branding and leadership to parenting and communication. I received my BA from SUNY Albany and a Master of Business Administration from Zicklin School of Business/Baruch College.
I live in Manhattan with my husband and three sons. Together, we own Eighteen Restaurant, a beloved spot on the Upper East Side where my husband Sidney and I connect with guests and friends over delicious meals and warm hospitality.
Have you ever had to pivot?
I had taken time off to have my kids and be a wife and mother. I opened a consulting business called Tammy Cohen Marketing and Consulting in 2007. I worked with small business owners, mainly in traditional marketing, helping these businesses with their marketing needs. I was able to manage my home life and work.
My husband’s garment center business, which was our primary source of support, encountered major setbacks and issues that started in 2008, and by 2012, he had to close his business. This put us in financial hardship, and I realized I would have to ramp up my business. I was fortunate to contract with a large global business in the gem and jewelry space and became very immersed in their business. I was working on one of their proprietary diamond cuts and had to transform it into a respected brand. I traveled often, trained staff, and worked with excellent, brilliant, and talented people. It was my best pivot, going from small business work to global. I learned so much.
When the pandemic hit, my large client shifted, and my contract halved, which caused me to pivot again. I spent a lot of time on my personal development and working on my mindset and limiting beliefs about myself, which got me into a new way of thinking. I transitioned my consulting business to an LLC. I named it TC Marketing and Consulting DBA TC Brand Consulting and began working with other clients in the gem and jewelry business. At the same time, I also pivoted to start a women’s business network called Women Beyond the Table, which came about as an idea of getting women business owners together during the pandemic to virtually network and exchange services and leverage each other’s social capital. Starting a podcast and becoming an author were things that I never thought to do or had any idea of how to do, but it was part of the pivot to creating the Tammy J Cohen Brand, which is my focus for 2025.
Learning and unlearning are both critical parts of growth – can you share a story of a time when you had to unlearn a lesson?
There are a bunch of lessons that I had to unlearn:
1) I cannot take on something unless I meet 100 % of the requirements for the project. This is inaccurate because you learn so much while on a project, and there are always ways to find information. You can be 75% qualified and be fine. There is a learning curve for everything. For example, when I got my MBA, there was no Internet or courses on starting and managing a global women’s business network.
2) I must wait to launch something new until everything is perfect. If you wait for everything in your business to be perfect before you allow yourself to launch, you will never do it. Once again, you learn by doing. I self-published my first book, which was a great trial run. I realized what I needed to improve the book and make the content even better and that I needed a solid team around me to guide me in the publishing industry.
3) Failure is a bad thing; There is no failure; it is a normal part of the journey. It is an opportunity to learn and do better the next time. I make decisions quickly; sometimes they work, and sometimes they do not, and I try to learn from the bad choices.
4) Do everything yourself to save money. Resources are always an issue; honestly, you must invest in whatever you do. However, I realized that I do not have specific skill sets and cannot do everything independently. My human design is the Projector, and my energy is best used in big thought generation and guiding. I am not as detail-oriented, and technology is not my jam. I have learned to delegate tasks to people who excel at them. I surround myself with people complimenting my strengths and balancing my weaknesses.
5) You need to have a big plan or motivation. For me, it starts with one small step; the motivation grows after you take a step, and each step reveals the next. I get overwhelmed thinking about an entire plan. Things always come up, so for me, one small step works. This is how I have managed everything in my life.
Contact Info:
- Website: www.tcbrandconsulting.com This will be transitioning to www.tammyjcohen.com by April 2025 www.womenbeyondthetable.com
- Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/tammyjcohen/ https://www.instagram.com/textmessagestomysons/
- Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/Textmessagestomysons
- Linkedin: https://www.linkedin.com/in/tammy-cohen-915815143/
- Youtube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCN-daCPxh4vZL8C9Z3pcX0w
- Other: https://www.amazon.com/Text-Messages-My-Sons-Communicate/dp/196354918X/
https://podcasts.apple.com/podcast/id1658814201
https://open.spotify.com/show/1XL29qip6IroGXfBCqW4kE
