Alright – so today we’ve got the honor of introducing you to Surya Nycole. We think you’ll enjoy our conversation, we’ve shared it below.
Surya, appreciate you joining us today. Do you feel you or your work has ever been misunderstood or mischaracterized? If so, tell us the story and how/why it happened and if there are any interesting learnings or insights you took from the experience?
Great question! My writing has and will continue to be misunderstood by many, yet it is understood my many as well. Those who misunderstand my work are those who have not begun their healing journey. As with anything we see, it really all comes down to perspective and where we are at in our journey of life. We all see the world through different lenses. I have noticed in the last decade of publicly sharing my work, those who are healing have different lenses, yet the same view of healing. Where those who are not working on their healing see through multiple lenses and have scattered, confusing points of view on their life and others. I learned in facing the misunderstanding within myself and those who misunderstand my work, to continue to be myself. Continue to speak up for those, like me, who had at one point lost their voice. Everyday I stand firm in the face of trauma and refuse to allow it to overtake me and those around me. Healing is possible!
Awesome – so before we get into the rest of our questions, can you briefly introduce yourself to our readers.
My life has many stories of significant life altering trauma. Trauma literally changes your brain. It changes the way you think about yourself as well as anyone else. Because of this my trauma has made me feel comfortable in very uncomfortable and abusive relationships. I began drinking daily in the early 2000’s. It became my way of numbing all the confusion and pain. I would seek out therapy, however, due to the stigma of family and society, I didn’t want to truly admit how bad my mental state was and on top of that, when I did admit I had a problem, it was typically sugar coated or brushed under the rug, which made me think I was exaggerating. This only made me feel crazy and begin to believe my abusers that I actually was crazy. Because of the chronic abuse I endured in my life as well as the duration. I have CPTSD. Triggers are everywhere for me. When you have CPTSD you know you do not want to feel this way, you want peace, but it feels and is at times very impossible to obtain. I tried therapy, medication, self help, you name it, I was constantly seeking out healing so I could stop hurting. My addiction really only helped me not feel the torment and because the triggers were constant, that seemed to be the only way to live, yet it was killing me, yet keeping me alive. I have been sober going on 6 years. It is a journey. It is pain and pleasure. There is nothing easy about sobriety. It takes courage and patience and compassion for yourself. I know there are many more lives out there who live like this as well. Ones that are only clinging to hope, because the intimate people they have in their lives do not understand, or choose not to. My writing gives validation to the trauma we endured, to our feelings and to our healing. No one should be alone in the darkness others covered their lives with, and when they can’t see or feel the light within themself. My work is there to continue to ignite their hope.
For you, what’s the most rewarding aspect of being a creative?
What I find to be so rewarding in my work is that I impact lives all over the world. I have touched the lives of people I have never even met. To see my own healing and growth impact my life and also impact another, really makes me tear up, just thinking of the lives they too will impact from their healing. Truly, there is no better reward than to help others feel heard, understood, and heal.
We often hear about learning lessons – but just as important is unlearning lessons. Have you ever had to unlearn a lesson?
Perfection. it does not exist! I have been working on Publishing my first Devotional of my Untangle Me, devotional series since 2017. Granted, I have faced significant trials in this time, I have not given myself the grace and mercy that I should have. I expected to complete and publish it in 2017, and since then have given myself a hard time for not publishing it till this year. When we are in the process of doing something with significance, it can not and will not be rushed. I am grateful that I did not publish it sooner and I really wish that I did not give myself such a hard time. Looking back I see how those negative thoughts and self punishment brought doubt and discouragement. That often made me feel that I was not worthy of my abilities and should give up. That really hindered my progress. When we don’t focus on being perfect, we are more self aware and present. We are able to create better work without the weight of the judgment of ourselves and the potential judgment of others. The imperfections make us unique, and perfect in our own way.
Contact Info:
- Instagram: @SuryaNycole
- Facebook: @SuryaNycole
- Linkedin: https://www.linkedin.com/in/surya-nycole/
- Youtube: @SuryaNycole
- Other: TikTok: @SuryaNycole