We were lucky to catch up with Shilo Rayne recently and have shared our conversation below.

Shilo, thanks for joining us, excited to have you contributing your stories and insights. How did you learn to do what you do? Knowing what you know now, what could you have done to speed up your learning process? What skills do you think were most essential? What obstacles stood in the way of learning more?

I spent a lot of time watching my favorite artists/photographers share behind-the-scenes content of their shooting process or how they would utilize tools in Photoshop to put the finishing touches on the images they made. There were countless hours dedicated to watching YouTube videos, watching classes on Creative Live, and practicing with test images from Phlearn and other learning sites. Of course, even after spending time watching the videos your skill only improves once you start executing the processes you are learning. So I would try to practice whenever time, school, work, and my mental health permitted.

I knew it would have been beneficial for me to spend time learning and fine-tuning one style of Photography but my mind is always wandering through avenues of curiosity so it made sense that I wanted to explore beauty/fashion/commercial photography. I was also trying to think more pragmatically about my work and what was marketable to people. I love my Fine Art photographs but people don’t know me so they’re hardly going to be buying my prints. But learning other forms of photography that still give me a way to creatively express myself and could be a service more easily sold, made for an easy transition.

There were a few skills that were essential in this process: One was taking the tools I had learned from retouching my Fine Art photos and utilizing them in new ways to retouch my beauty and fashion work. Two was the ability to take what I was learning as far as lighting, composing subjects in my frame, styling the subject, and capturing an image that looked editorial and professional. I realize people can spend all of this money on the best gear and going to workshops with some of the top photographers and still not know what to do with all that they have. It reminds me that you can be savvy with the gear that is available to you and still create incredible imagery.

I still felt envy for money always being a looming insecurity in my life. From childhood to adulthood I missed out on so many things that I would have loved to do and benefited from because of costs. I always wanted to sign-up for the best retouching workshops or photography classes with instructors that helped instill motivation in me to keep creating. But these classes would cost a few grand that I just couldn’t spare. Even though I’ve been able to learn so much through those videos and my own trial and error, I always wonder where my skillset and portfolio could be now had I been able to attend those in-person workshops.

Great, appreciate you sharing that with us. Before we ask you to share more of your insights, can you take a moment to introduce yourself and how you got to where you are today to our readers

I think about the title of Joan Didion’s book, “We Tell Ourselves Stories In Order to Live”. How much of our lives are wrapped up in the shared experiences of others? Even our own life is compiled of fragments of embellished non-fiction we write to ourselves mentally. The stories of other lives we might have lived, people we would have ended up with given the right circumstances, or directions we could have gone had we chosen differently. No matter the outcome the stories are a safeguard to keep us feeling grounded, to keep us feeling connected, to keep us feeling alive. So here is a story.

To put it simply: I’m an artist. I know it sounds vague and broad but that’s what I am. My medium of choice right now is primarily Digital Photography but I’ve never been one to place myself in a single direction with one path to explore.

My interest in photography piqued around 2012 when I was gifted my first camera. At the time, I had no clear guidelines of what I wanted out of the medium. It sometimes felt like a nice accessory to carry around with me and for others, it felt like dead weight. I played around with shooting pretty much everything: a singular flower in a park, passersby on a busy sidewalk, and even some portraits of couples and newborns. Nothing seemed off-limits but everything felt mundane.

While in college I dabbled with my camera periodically in between the congested schedule that was my life. I remember skipping one of my college classes one day and I took myself to my favorite coffee shop instead. I had my camera with me and was combing through another series of disappointing shots from the past several weeks. My attention span was short-lived and I began browsing through Facebook when I stumbled upon an image of a woman leaning back in a yellow dress with blue butterflies looking as if they were bursting from her body. I didn’t know it at the time but that image and that artist would change the trajectory of my photography forever.

I grew curious and went down a rabbit hole of her work. Who was she and how did she create this compelling imagery? I learned that the artist was Brooke Shaden. Her work was not beautiful or refined but rather hauntingly hopeful and raw. She showed you in her work and her writing the stitches that artists wear and work so hard to conceal. But she didn’t want to conceal, she wanted to shed light on the journey of finding her voice and identity in her work. It was like a switch had been turned on for me and I knew exactly where I wanted to go with my photography. There was more to this medium than carefully posed portraits and curated couples. I had my life and there was a story to tell, and I decided that it was now going to be told through my photography.

Throughout the years as I experimented with this newfound style I encountered a series of frustrating setbacks and failed pieces. As a viewer, we think what makes the artist great is the final version of their best work but we never see behind the curtains of incomplete projects or disappointing final drafts. I spent so much time wondering when was I going to improve, and when would I make a picture that I was genuinely proud to share with conviction. Eventually, after several works that were okay at best, one image left an impression on me. It’s a photograph of the subject running in the middle of nowhere wearing a bright red coat, hanging onto her hat with her suitcase trailing behind her. The title of the piece is called “Opportunities”. At the time, I made it as a way for me to reflect on a future I might have. A version of life if I were to never settle, living it to the fullest flying by the seat of my pants and never looking back with regret. The C.S. Lewis quote “There are far better things ahead than any we leave behind” inspired the work. The idea that nothing in this life could be off-limits to me so long as I gave myself the chance to go after it. I felt hopeful and curious about what was waiting for me down the road. Of course, a folly of that mindset is that things aren’t waiting for you to be plopped in your lap once you hit a certain date. These things will only be lying ahead if you are willing to create the right circumstances for them to happen. Otherwise, it’s all wishful thinking and hopeless daydreams.

From there I was able to be published in a prominent local magazine in Oklahoma City and hold a couple of exhibits for my Fine Art work. Eventually, I found myself interested in creating imagery that was more commercial and editorial so I started teaching myself the fundamentals of shooting beauty and fashion photography. It felt like a natural transition because I realized it was still a way for me to utilize my creativity that didn’t feel available to me when shooting couples and wedding photography.

I think what sets me apart from others is that even though I share heartfelt and sentimental captions with my images, I always try to lean into the side of me that would utilize humor to get through the tragedies in my own life. I never want someone to see my posts on social and meet me in real life feeling like I am a completely different person from the one that has been portrayed online. Too often we want to curate and filter what we share about ourselves as individuals and as artists. I want to bare it all. I don’t want to leave any room for misrepresentation of who I am and how I want people to see me. I work hard to not be ashamed of the things I had to personally go through in my life and it’s so important to share these experiences through the lens of having worked through that grief to the lens of still reeling in that grief. I know it’s online and there is only so much authenticity you can maintain while you selectively share your content, but it’s possible. I want my audience to see me as relatable and not so profound in my thinking that what I write will read as disingenuous. I want people to see my work and feel as if they are not alone. These are our lives and if me being brave enough to share my faults and shortcomings so that someone else is not feeling isolated in their experience then it’s absolutely worth it to me.

If I am proud of anything at all it is 1. Continuing to pursue a career with photography and 2. Still being myself after all of this time. Of course, we grow and change but there is a comfort to be found in something so guaranteed as change. I don’t have to feel that who I am right now is all I am ever going to be. And now at almost thirty, I don’t feel like things are over for me, it honestly feels like another beginning. I may not be a photographer forever and that’s okay with me. This life was sold to me as something I had to decide who I was going to be well before I was old enough to know what I wanted out of it. If I can keep saying “yes” to the parts of my life that are aligned with my values then I’ll never be settling. That alone is success in my eyes.

I write this and two of my images are coming to mind: “Opportunities” and “Another Life”. I think about the things I had to leave behind. The people I had to let go of, the career paths I chose to forfeit, and the move across the country I so desperately wanted to make. At the same time, I sometimes imagine a life where I had stayed in the midwest, pursued a more financially stable career path, started training for ballet or wrestling when I was a child, staying in band or honor choir as a kid, or moving to Paris to work at a local coffee shop and my studio apartment lives right above it. In retrospect, they’re not lives I would have truly wanted, but they are stories I tell myself.

Learning and unlearning are both critical parts of growth – can you share a story of a time when you had to unlearn a lesson?

A big one that I struggled with and still have to challenge is the idea that other artists are not my competition. There is room for everyone at the top and success is not isolated to a select few.

I remember how much imposter syndrome riddled my psyche early on. I let myself be overcome with envy and jealousy when I watched people I followed achieve a creative milestone or those close to me reach a level of success that I hadn’t. Even if it was in a field that I wasn’t pursuing it still made me feel like I wasn’t doing enough as an artist. I thought that I was being lazy and that I needed to work harder in order to get to where I wanted to be. But often times I didn’t know where I wanted to end up, I just knew I didn’t like where I was at.

I realize that I was feeling that way because of an insecurity I held about myself and my own work. What helped the most was shifting my mindset when I would see my friends or followers achieve some semblance of success and telling myself 1. Envy sometimes might arise and that’s okay but you can still be supportive and happy for them while you work through that emotion 2. Their success does not diminish what you are working towards or trying to accomplish. Other artists are not your competition. Build and maintain relationships with them because the more you work on keeping a rapport with them, they’ll remember that and continue to root for you along the way.

A large reason why I felt this way was because when I started on my photography journey all those years ago, I had a sibling of mine take up photography as well. They never said anything to me directly but they would tell family members and friends to never hire me for work and hire them instead, they constantly criticized my work when I was still learning how to retouch and use my camera, and they would constantly mock and make fun of me and say how much better their work was than mine. It made me feel like it was a competition. Because they held a deeply rooted insecurity about themselves, it, unfortunately, spilled over into me. They could never be proud of me and that hurt so much. I was so close to throwing in the towel and giving up photography because I didn’t want to create work with malintent. If it wasn’t going to be for myself then it wouldn’t be made at all.

I’m forever grateful that I fought that urge to quit and did so much work on myself over the years. And it’s not to say that I never feel that way, but the feeling never hits me as strongly as it used to. If I feel envy then I allow myself to have that emotion and work through it until envy fades into contentment. I tell myself that I am doing just fine because the most important goal for me is to feel good about myself and my work while uplifting other artists to the pedestal we can all stand tall on.

How about pivoting – can you share the story of a time you’ve had to pivot?

There are two big shifts I made that stand out to me. One was when I graduated from college with my degree in Criminal Justice and Forensic Science. I moved to California with the intent of landing some type of career in law enforcement. I thought that it was time to grow up and focus on getting my “Adult Job”. After many rejected applications I finally made it through several stages at the Sheriff’s Department in West Hollywood. I had passed my polygraph, physical, and background check and was very close to being given a conditional job offer before I backed out last minute.

There was a part of me that felt now was not the time to settle into a stable carer path. I know it sounds ridiculous to a lot of people but I was finally done with college and had all of the freedom in the world to create my art. I knew if I took that job that it would take my time to create with it and that was not a risk I was willing to take.

The second shift happened back in 2020 when the pandemic was at its worse, I talked to my therapist about which values I held in my life and I learned that self-expression was at the forefront. When I came to that realization I quickly enrolled in community college and signed up for an acting class, a vocal class, and a piano class. I didn’t have any set goal in mind other than these were activities that I found interesting and had wanted to try before the pandemic began. I was fine with letting my photography take the backseat for a bit while I explored these other creative avenues. I don’t regret it for one second because I was able to take risks auditioning and performing in theater productions and the choir at my community college. I learned the fundamentals of playing the piano and some pieces that really resonated with me.

It was important for me to do this because sometimes as artists we feel stuck. We think that if we are a painter then all we are allowed to do is paint. But why not transcribe your paintings into poetry? It’s no wonder we see actors turn to producers, writers, and directors because acting is not the only career path you are allowed to pursue. I wanted to see what I could do with these newfound skills. I went in with no expectations of myself to be great and understood that talent was something that was practiced and learned. If I wanted to see results from any of these endeavors then I needed to put in the work. Yes, my photography went on the back burner but my god I was so fulfilled at the same time. My time never felt wasted, only spent on other things.

I share this because I don’t want people to see creative paths as something that needs to be done with the intent of financial gain. Sometimes it can be done just because. For me, theater-based acting is a fun hobby of mine. There is no goal to go perform on broadway, only shows that seem fun and interesting and where I can grow in the craft. And if I get paid in the process then that’s a perk. Because after all is said and done, I’ll always have my art.

Contact Info:

• Website: www.shiloraynephotography.com
• Instagram: shilo.rayne_photography
• Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/Rayne.Photography/?paipv=0&eav=AfbYZpTv0Z3axOHNBWSgjgZ6GGbWudk6XHY6e5LtkgcmLDewYZXXdRe360Xx6I-0Bok&_rdr
• Linkedin: https://www.linkedin.com/in/shilo-rayne-44a077166/
• Twitter: @Shilo_Rayne
• Youtube: @shilorayne5530
• Yelp: https://www.yelp.com/biz/shilo-rayne-photography-los-angeles?utm_campaign=www_business_share_popup&utm_medium=copy_link&utm_source=(direct)