We’re excited to introduce you to the always interesting and insightful Shevaani Sen. We hope you’ll enjoy our conversation with Shevaani below.

Shevaani , thanks for joining us, excited to have you contributing your stories and insights. Was there a defining moment in your professional career? A moment that changed the trajectory of your career?

I think it wasn’t one but many moments in my life where – whenever I would ask a question that involved “why?” e.g Why do we do it like this?

And I would be told “you are too sensitive, why can’t you just accept this, please stop creating problems”.

It’s these moments that drove me to start wondering “what is wrong with me?”, ” what am I doing wrong?”…this was the beginning of me shutting myself down.

Shevaani , love having you share your insights with us. Before we ask you more questions, maybe you can take a moment to introduce yourself to our readers who might have missed our earlier conversations?

Well, I am passionate about Intergenerational Trauma. It is because I was raised in a patriarchal environment where intergenerational trauma ran rampant. As I grew older, I realized something was amiss. I can still remember slowly shutting myself down – from wanting to live to wanting to unalive myself.

I got started on mental health mostly because I just wanted to feel better; I didn’t know why I was feeling these things or why I had such desires. So I dove into mental health.

I learned, took classes, got certified as a coach and somewhere along the way I thought to myself “I don’t want anyone else to feel this way” so I tried to teach and talk to whomever would listen.

I realized it starts at childhood – we can break these generational cycles if we parent consciously. This then automatically leads to healing yourself, because unless you do so, your parenting relationship will be laced with your traumas.

I offer:
1:1 coaching – this is a 12-week coaching package personalized to individual clients
Empathetic listening sessions
10-day beginner Parent-Child Connection Challenge

I am in the process of creating a Parent Support Group.

What I solve for clients:
I help them heal, I help them see that they don’t have to live in pain and that cycles can be broken.

I help parents nurture their children differently than how they were conditioned to. This “difference” is what creates a secure bond between the parent-child, which then leads to less stressful parenting, less yelling, more cooperation from the child and a foundation for a relationship where when the child is grown and flown – they still want to have a relationship what the parent – out of love. You can have a relationship with your adult child outside of obligatory birthdays and holidays.

My work is unique because it comes from a place of “curiosity”, we don’t make assumptions. We become curious. This is unique because I bring in my own experiences. I don’t just teach this, I live it.

I am proud of how I am nurturing my son. We have a relationship where he feels secure, we have a bond where he feels safe to voice his opinions and feelings.

Personally, I am able to recognize the generational conditioning issues when they come up (and they do) and I am able to work through them – and not succumb to them. I know why I react the way I do and I am able to work my way through it. It used to impact my relationship with both my son and partner. Taking responsibility for my emotional well being has improved my relationship with them. This is also teaching my son how to take ownership of his emotional well-being.
As parents it is our job to create judgement-free homes where children feel loved, accepted, free to show and embrace ALL emotions, emotional regulation and how to take care of themselves. The best way to teach is to model it. It becomes easier to model this when one understands their deep rooted beliefs, their unconscious biases, triggers and practices meta-cognition.

My work is judgment free. I am curious and I urge others to become curious instead of condemning themselves and their children. You do not have to live in pain and angst.

If you could go back in time, do you think you would have chosen a different profession or specialty?

I would 100% choose this path. I feel called to do this, I feel equipped to do this – what I am doing is crucial to next generation. With rise of technology the foundations of relationships is eroding and if we don’t work now to parent from a place of curiosity, healing and understanding we will continue to lose ourselves, our children and the relationship we share.

Humans need connection to thrive – and with trauma, one looses connection with self – when this happens, parents are unable to connect with their children. Without connection, parents aren’t able to lead their children. Loss of connection to self impacts all other relationships, because then we constantly look to others to fulfill our emotional needs. This causes chronic stress which can lead to physical ailments such as inflammation. Additionally, other issues develop such as lack of confidence, drug and alcohol abuse, lack or trust etc. If we can heal ourselves, we can heal our relationships and we can heal the future.

What’s a lesson you had to unlearn and what’s the backstory?

Besides everything that I already listed above …
Unlearning most of the belief systems: reliance on others, sacrifice is the ultimate show of love and respect, conforming to others expectations of me to get love and respect.

I now know that I am whole in myself – all I need to do is find myself and that is through healing.

Contact Info:

• Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/shevaanisenofficial/
• Linkedin: https://www.linkedin.com/in/shevaani-sen
• Other: ticktock – https://www.tiktok.com/@shevaanisen