Meet Sara ONeil

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Sed ut perspiciatis unde.

We were lucky to catch up with Sara ONeil recently and have shared our conversation below.

Alright, Sara thanks for taking the time to share your stories and insights with us today. Let’s kick things off with your mission – what is it and what’s the story behind why it’s your mission?

My mission became clear over the past few years–I talk to people about relationships and boundaries and inspire them to honor themselves. I do this all day; whether on vacation or outside in a rainstorm, some dating shenanigans are being discussed. It was what I had always been doing; I just hadn’t seen it because I was always pursuing something else. However, while I was pursuing that other thing, I was chatting about love, letting go, and how to live unapologetically. While I had been in a completely different career (working in reality television), I spent all my free time helping people surrender the person (usually an obstinate love interest) they didn’t want to surrender and put themselves first. Of course, this wasn’t a coincidence; I had been doing this my entire life. I had spent most of my life as a raging people pleaser, which consisted of worrying about others and always putting their needs before mine. It took a lot of unraveling to get past this, but now it has become my mission to help others who are going through the same. I co-wrote a dating book called When the F Will He Text, and I have another book coming out in 2024 about people-pleasing. It is the topic I never shut up about.

Sara, love having you share your insights with us. Before we ask you more questions, maybe you can take a moment to introduce yourself to our readers who might have missed our earlier conversations?

I worked as a reality television Casting Director for almost two decades. My favorite part of the job was interviewing so many amazing people over the years. I have heard the most incredible stories, ranging from inspiring to comedy to heartbreak and everything in between. Whether it was with the people I was talking to for the casting or with my co-workers, I always found myself discussing relationships and breakups, even when the show content had nothing to do with dating. Over those years, the book When the F Will He Text was written, re-written, and implemented repeatedly, even though it didn’t come out until 2022. Most people find their way to me when they are in a terrible breakup, or they are in relationship limbo and are struggling with letting go of someone they don’t want to let go of. I feel that my superpower is in non-judgemental guidance. I’ve heard it all, and nothing a person can tell me will shock me. Also, perfection is out, there is no timeline for “getting it right.”

For all the updated ways to work with me, I am reachable through my website at saraoneil.com.

What’s a lesson you had to unlearn and what’s the backstory?

The lesson I had to unlearn was people-pleasing and putting others before me. For most of my life, I had taken on the role of “enabler” and “the nice one.” I was the one who laughed at everyone’s jokes (including the bad ones) and made sure everyone was content and happy. I didn’t consider what I wanted; I was fine as long as everyone was safe and everything ran smoothly. It was my survival mechanism and how I navigated most situations. On a deeper level, I was trying to save people who didn’t ask to be saved, and healing this was an excruciating, unraveling process that took many years to work through. Did I want this to be my life lesson? Not a chance. It was the challenge I thought was my greatest weakness, yet it became my greatest gift. It became my purpose, and though it was never something I planned to write about or talk about, it is now my favorite subject. My life was preparing me for this, I just had no idea at the time.

For you, what’s the most rewarding aspect of being a creative?

I love being completely free–in my art, expression, environment, and time. If I want to stay up until 3 am drinking matcha and listening to power ballads or pull an all-night-long writing session, then that is what I will do. If I go through a period where I feel things are getting monotonous or routine, I will shake it up with a road trip or something out of the norm. This makes me feel creative, which, in turn, is very rewarding. I no longer care what it “looks like.” I used to think I had to go on some crazy trip somewhere to tap into adventure and creativity, but I can access it by taking my computer to a new coffee shop somewhere I haven’t been. It’s my state of mind. After a lifetime of “doing things right,” I found freedom in the chaos and imperfection. This is why I love personal stories and uncovering the shadows that keep one from one’s true self. Interviewing thousands of people for reality television showed me my deep love of people’s unique and individual journeys. This is what I find deeply rewarding.

Contact Info:

Website: saraoneil.com
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/sarajoneil
Facebook: facebook.com/saraoneil
Linkedin: https://www.linkedin.com/in/sara-oneil/

Image Credits
Anastasia Stanecki

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Meet Sara ONeil

Meet Sara ONeil

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Alright, Sara thanks for taking the time to share your stories and insights with us today. Let’s kick things off with your mission – what is it and what’s the story behind why it’s your mission?

Sara, love having you share your insights with us. Before we ask you more questions, maybe you can take a moment to introduce yourself to our readers who might have missed our earlier conversations?

What’s a lesson you had to unlearn and what’s the backstory?

For you, what’s the most rewarding aspect of being a creative?

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