Alright – so today we’ve got the honor of introducing you to Ruthie Skillman. We think you’ll enjoy our conversation, we’ve shared it below.

Ruthie , appreciate you joining us today. Owning a business isn’t always glamorous and so most business owners we’ve connected with have shared that on tough days they sometimes wonder what it would have been like to have just had a regular job instead of all the responsibility of running a business. Have you ever felt that way?

I’m definitely happier as a business owner. That’s not to say it’s easy. I didn’t realize I’d be working more hours, but every business owner knows that it’s hard NOT to work when you’re running a business. We don’t get to clock in, leave work at work, and clock out. I have to know everything about the business–the accounting, the advertising/marketing, the art itself, client relations, etc. It’s all on me. Sometimes I do think it would be great to work for someone else, so I could just show up, do my job and go home. But having a business is truly like being on a roller coaster. Sometimes you’re up and everything is running smoothly, and sometimes you’re hurtling towards the ground at 90mph. So now the ups and downs don’t surprise me. I expect them. A fellow photographer asked me to come work for her and take pictures for her business. It would have meant giving up on my own dream. I thought about it, and seriously considered it. Life is pretty crazy–I’m a single mom with 2 small kids, so it’s a juggling act. But I kept working for myself. I realized that fear couldn’t guide my decisions, and quitting to work for someone else would have been a decision made in fear. Fear that I won’t make a profit. Fear that I couldn’t juggle everything on my own. Fear that I’m doing too much and messing up my kids. I remembered why I started full time: I wanted to live life on my terms and be there for my kids. The hotel had a copy of Baltimore Magazine; a photo I took was inside. I took it as a sign and I hung in there. I’m learning how to trust myself (I’m still here, thriving) and to push through fear. I don’t see it as something to avoid, but something to learn from and overcome.

Awesome – so before we get into the rest of our questions, can you briefly introduce yourself to our readers.

I started out as a newborn photographer. I love babies, and loved posing them and creating beautiful memories for the parents. But as life happened around me, I realized I was very drawn to boudoir: the light and shadows, the vulnerability…I wanted to try it. I thought it was crazy to move from newborns to booties, but once I started going through a separation from my husband, I dove in. I had nothing to lose, no one to criticize the switch. I learned that boudoir was about so much more than sexy pictures. It’s about taking back your power as a woman, rejecting the fear & shame that so many of us grew up with, and proudly existing as a sexual, confident woman. I help women grow in confidence by doing the thing they’re afraid of. I teach my clients that you don’t have to be confident to do this, you just have to take the next step. I guide them through the entire process and offer encouragement. (I love being a hype woman!) There are no models on my website; they’re all real women. I’m so proud when I hear that their shoot was life-changing.

Can you share a story from your journey that illustrates your resilience?

I remember in the early days of my separation, dropping my boys off before the sun rose so I could go to a 12-hour nursing shift. It was a tough transition that summer, and my kids needed me. They got sick, I had no support, and I had to quit my nursing job. I doubled down my efforts in my business, determined to make it work. I struggled in the beginning; my power even got shut off. Ashamed, I took my boys to a hotel and considered working for someone else. Somewhere with a nice 401K savings match. The hotel had a copy of Baltimore Magazine; a photo I took was inside. I took it as a sign and I hung in there. A year later I’d have my first six figure year.

Is there a particular goal or mission driving your creative journey?

My goal/mission is to simply uplift women. To help them see themselves in a new light. I want to meet them where they are today, whether they are 100% confident, or whether they’re struggling to love themselves. I want them to use their voice, instead of being the small and quiet women society has historically encouraged us to be.

Contact Info:

• Website: www.confidenceboudoir.com
• Instagram: www.instagram.com/theconfidencesessionsboudoir
• Facebook: www.facebook.com/groups/theconfidencesessions

Image Credits
All images by Ruthie Skillman Photography LLC