We caught up with the brilliant and insightful Rhiana Pfaff a few weeks ago and have shared our conversation below.

Rhiana, appreciate you joining us today. Risk taking is something we’re really interested in and we’d love to hear the story of a risk you’ve taken.

In 2014, at a fork in the road of our lives, I convinced my family to move to Haiti and it changed our lives forever.

Looking back to 2013, we had an amazing life, full of fun and adventures, but I kept feeling this pull to help the poor. Whether it was the homeless in our own community, or people far away, it grew from a whisper to a roar. Around this time, our oldest daughter (age 12 at the time) had just come to me with an idea for a non-profit. I listened and supported her, and we set out on this journey of starting a non-profit together. All four of us had hearts that were moving in the same direction. Truthfully, looking back, I’m not sure I wanted to change our lifestyle really, just make more of an impact – but other plans lay ahead.

We took a month-long trip to Haiti to help at an orphanage. While it is the journey that brought us to Haiti, I will forever regret how that trip impacted the children at the orphanage (a story for another time perhaps, but let’s just stay that orphan voluntourism is not something I recommend). During this month, we learned so much and our hearts expanded. When time came to leave, we were heartbroken and eagerly planned our next trip. One more monthlong trip was the spark we needed. Just 2 months later, we moved to Haiti and would go on to live there for nearly 5 years.

Living in Haiti were some of the hardest years of my life. The culture shock, learning the language, and adjusting to life without power full-time were only a few of the tough lessons we learned. We saw heartache and poverty, life and death, corruption and injustice, and learned more than we ever imagined. And this lit a fire in us to seek justice for the oppressed.

One of the injustices that led to launching our organization, was seeing that children had little to no option to attend school for free. It seemed crazy to me that people without means would be asked to pay to send their children to school. And yet, this was the case – and was a main cause of so many children being relinquished to an orphanage. We felt strongly that the cost of school shouldn’t rip families apart, so my husband and I launched our organization (Pfamily Mission) to help make education possible for the children in our community. To date, we have sent nearly 100 children to school each year. We look forward to building our own school in the community, making education possible for every child.

While we no longer live in Haiti, our hearts and organization are forever tied. The lessons that we, and our children, learned have been etched into our souls. And we are better people, with bigger hearts, because of our time there.

Great, appreciate you sharing that with us. Before we ask you to share more of your insights, can you take a moment to introduce yourself and how you got to where you are today to our readers

During the month I taught English at an orphanage in Port au Prince, we learned that nearly all these “orphans” had parents 😲 … parents who loved them and cared about their futures, but couldn’t afford the cost of both food and education. How crazy is it that in such an impoverished country that education is not free? We moved to Haiti shortly after this trip, and vowed to help children stay with their parents.

My husband and I started Pfamily Mission while living in Haiti in 2014 and successfully ran it as a team. Upon returning to the US, I have taken on running the day-to-day operations while my husband stepped back to take on more work to support our family (we have never taken a salary from the organization).

So, what does the org do?

Pfamily Mission works to build stronger, healthier communities and alleviate poverty by giving parents the support they need to provide for their families and to know they’re not forgotten in their challenges.
Children get an education and stay with their parents.
Parents get to learn in community classes.
Hurting and hungry people get help.
The community begins to thrive instead of just survive.

As a homeschooling mom, I believe that education matters. Education is the key that unlocks opportunity and changes the trajectory of a child’s future. I believe that every child has the right to a quality education. I am proud to help so many kids in Haiti to receive an education and look forward to launching our own school in the next couple of years.

I have a vision to create a school with a holistic learning environment, play- and project-based learning, and opportunities to learn things that aren’t taught in traditional Haitian classrooms (i.e. gardening, nutrition, goal-setting, entrepreneurship, and more). I look forward to creating a forward-thinking classroom for the students in the Port au Prince community we serve.

This month, we hired a counseling team to help the parents in the community through their stresses and struggles. With the continuous and growing insecurity in Haiti, we have seen families struggle. A parent’s mental health affects the whole family, so we thought it only made sense to help parents get more support in managing their stress. And for parents to form a support group to help one another, as well as destigmatize mental health in the community.

School begins in September, so we are currently gearing up for back-to-school. We have a waitlist of kids without school sponsors, so if you’re looking to help a child in need, this is a great way to do that!

Sponsor a student at pfamilymission.org

Learning and unlearning are both critical parts of growth – can you share a story of a time when you had to unlearn a lesson?

Orphanage volunteering is good. Or is it?

In 2013, I spent a month at an orphanage in Haiti teaching English. I brought my family along, and we helped out in a variety of ways. I fully believed at the time that we were needed, and making life better for the children there. I later learned how much it was hurting.

I only saw things from my privileged American perspective. But after spending much time there, and doing a lot of learning and research, I learned the truth. Orphanage voluntourism is one of the worst things we can do to “help”. While we may be able to provide some material needs for the children, the emotional damage we do along the way is detrimental to healthy caregiver attachment.

Foreigners coming and going not only support the financial means of the orphanage directors (furthering the corruption of both running the orphanage and getting new children in), but also causes attachment issues for these children. Additionally, this kind of “support” perpetuates the myth that children in developing nations would be better off in the US and continues/pushes the narrative that people without means shouldn’t/can’t raise their own children.

I am often too emotional about this issue to be eloquent with my words, so forgive the clumsiness of this rant. At the end of the day, what I want everyone to know is this:
1. Every child deserves to be raised with their biological family (so long as it is a safe and loving one).
2. The reasons children end up in an orphanage will surprise and upset you.
3. Volunteering at an orphanage perpetuates greed and corruption that you will likely never see firsthand. But I have, so please take my word for it.
4. Giving to organizations that support families and children staying together/reuniting is one of the best ROI’s I know of.

Are there any books, videos, essays or other resources that have significantly impacted your management and entrepreneurial thinking and philosophy?

Books that have helped along my journey:
Start With Why (Simon Sinek) – Excellent read for those looking to find/better communicate their purpose.

Irresistible Revolution (Shane Claiborne) – A story of growing faith and yearn for justice.

The Four Agreements (Don Miguel Ruiz) – A must read for everyone over the age of 12!

Nonviolent Communication (Marshall B Rosenberg, PhD) – Communication is the basis of life. This book helps overcome unhealthy modes of communication that may have been ingrained in us growing up or along the way. Highly recommend this to anyone and everyone that works with other humans.

Thirst (Scott Harrison) – Marketing meets charity. Charity Water is the go-to source for most orgs seeking growth.

Art of Happiness (His Holiness the Dalai Lama) – Self-care and self-love is required and yet least likely thing we do as people who give our lives to others. This book is one to read over and over again.

Contact Info:

• Website: pfamilymission.org
• Instagram: @pfamilymission @rhianap
• Facebook: facebook.com/pfamilymission
• Linkedin: linkedin.com/in/rhiana
• Twitter: @pfamilymission
• Youtube: n/a
• Yelp: n/a

Image Credits
All images belong to Pfamily Mission