We recently connected with Patricia Rivera and have shared our conversation below.
Patricia , thanks for joining us, excited to have you contributing your stories and insights. Let’s start with the story of your mission. What should we know?
Two decades ago, I finally freed myself from the abusive relationship that had kept me from achieving my dreams and goals. After leaving, it was difficult to hold everything together, take care of the children, and financially support my family financially alone. One day I went to a church near my job during my lunch break to get food for the children. The woman helping out gave me the bag of food, then pulled out a nice bottle of body wash. She gave it to me and wrapped my hands around it. She said “This. Is. For. You.” It was like she was saying “I see you. I know you are struggling and I know you deserve to take care of yourself.” I wept because I never ever really took good care of myself. And this woman could see it no matter how much I tried to hide.
During the entire relationship, I only used makeup to hide my bruises. I realized that this was not just me doing this. During the many years of working with victims, I came to the realization that victims do all they can to help their children but rarely take care of themselves. They are not really thriving, they are merely struggling to survive. That can manifest itself in self-abuse, anxiety, depression, or not taking proper mental, physical and even spiritual health care. This is where the vision for ‘Smiles for Miles’ was born.
I am committed to empowerment through “Smiles for Miles” and my relationship workshops because when I look back at all of the obstacles that I had to overcome, those times when someone put a body wash in my hands for me, gave me a slashed price on a dress, or any other little trinket that was meant for me while I was striving solely to keep my children fed, clothed and warm, it puts a smile on my face. I wanted to be able to do that for people. And I promised that I would whenever I had a chance to do so. I pledged to go further and not just wait for chances, but to proactively seek out opportunities to do so on a grander scale.
Great, appreciate you sharing that with us. Before we ask you to share more of your insights, can you take a moment to introduce yourself and how you got to where you are today to our readers.
My name is Patricia Rivera. I am a mother of five, a survivor of domestic violence, and a woman who has dedicated her life to the practice of empowerment. To me, empowerment means knowing your personal power and living an authentic life. As an advocate against domestic violence for over 20 years, I know how important that internal strength is. I take pride in teaching empowerment workshops. In these sessions, I teach people about healthy and unhealthy behaviors in relationships, I give them tools to keep themselves and others safe and to practice self care. We cover goal planning, self esteem, and self awareness. It is vital for a person to have goals so that they are always working towards personal growth. When you are informed about what empowerment is and take strides toward empowerment as a lifestyle, you are unlikely to falter in achieving personal goals. Several years ago I founded a project called “Smiles for Miles” (we share a name with the dental charity, but are not related). The goal is to put self care products into the hands of victims and survivors of domestic violence in the hopes of putting a smile on their faces and of teaching the importance of self care and self esteem. Through personal and group pampering sessions, I teach how it feels to be pampered which is something abused women have to re-learn.
Can you share a story from your journey that illustrates your resilience?
Recently, I was approved for a mini grant through the Rhode Island Domestic Violence Prevention Fund to be able to teach prevention of abuse and unhealthy relationships. I learned about it through my volunteer work with the RI Coalition Against Domestic Violence. When I heard it was intended for prevention, I was so excited to apply for it to support empowerment training for young people. However, I had never written a grant before and the process was intimidating. My partner planned to help with the process but experienced an emergency, leaving me responsible for everything. I was tempted to give up. Instead, I reached out for support. I set up a meeting with the point person for the grant. She gave me advice about my application that helped me tailor the project. I later learned that what set my application apart from the rest was the way I talked simply and clearly about my personal story. To my joy, we were awarded $9,500, nearly twice what we asked for. I found out through the process that I had more inside me than I thought.
Can you talk to us about how your funded your business?
“Smiles for Miles” is supported through donations from my community. By investing seed money from my first job, I created a home store so I could pamper people, make them feel better about taking care of themselves. I then networked with people I do business with, people I know through church and other community groups to solicit donations. I’m humbled by how willing my donors are to say “Take this money for the products- I trust you.” I ensure they see the results afterwards. When I show them the result, they always say “wow”. I also realize that, as for myself it is so for others, when owning a business, it’s not just the product you are promoting, but the service you are providing is as important as, and perhaps even more, than the product.
I take pride in paying attention to the minutest details, even to the point of knowing what my customers want. This is a talent that I have perfected over time. You can really make someone’s day with a very inexpensive trinket if the person is certain that you served them with thoughtfulness and caring.
Not only am I giving back to the community, but I am investing in myself, my future, and the future of my children. I feel like there was so much more that came from that vision than just saving money for my 1st home, a legacy that I want to leave for my family. There was so much personal growth. My children, now grown, are learning to be entrepreneurs as well. I have invested so much but have also gotten so much more than I had ever bargained for. And this is just the beginning.
