We caught up with the brilliant and insightful Pamela O’Leary a few weeks ago and have shared our conversation below.
Pamela, appreciate you joining us today. Let’s go back in time a bit – can you share a story of a time when you learned an important lesson during your education?
In sophomore year of college at UC Berkeley, I took the risk to run for an executive office of student government. I auditioned to run with a premier, decades old political party called Student Action. After an extensive interview process, I was selected to be on their executive slate. This was a big deal, especially since I was not currently elected to student government, so was coming in as “an outsider.”
As you can imagine, student politics at Berkeley was no joke, and for about three months, campaigning was my entire life. For seven days a week, at least ten hours a day, I was pounding the pavement gathering endorsements and meeting voters. My fingers bled from rubbing in chalk campaign messages on the sidewalks of Berkeley. My ear drum eventually ruptured from pushing my body to a state of exhaustion and dehydration.
While I worked too hard, I didn’t believe in myself. Perhaps the entire endeavor was an attempt to make a difference, to prove to myself and the school I was somebody important. Ultimately, while I earned over 2,000 votes, I lost by 72. The rest of my slate won and went on to serve in elected office.
This became the great failure of my young adult life that would take me years to get over and rebuild my confidence. For too long, I conflated “I made a mistake” with “I am a mistake.” In terms of the story I told myself about myself, it was a narrative of “The campaign was a failure, therefore I am a failure.” This fixed mindset plagued me in my career and personal life.
Thirteen years later, I ousted incumbents, and during my first time on the ballot, I became an elected official, at the time, the youngest member of San Mateo County’s Democratic Central Committee. And a few years later, I would launch a business helping fellow insecure overachievers. It’s an ever evolving journey, but I am finally getting out of that fixed mindset, and moreover helping other leaders embrace a new growth mindset.
Awesome – so before we get into the rest of our questions, can you briefly introduce yourself to our readers.
I am in the process of building the Global Empowerment Lab, an organization curating empowerment journeys with individual and group coaching, workshops, and retreats. I am also currently writing a book about my personal empowerment journey.
While I found many guides along the way of my healing journey, I wish I had a version of Google Maps for my empowerment journey! I wasn’t even aware of the variety of modalities that even existed, yet ultimately proved tremendously instrumental in my personal growth. I was privileged to have friends who could recommend a great therapist, coach, or new modality. Yet so many people don’t have access to such information. When there are so many incredible entrepreneur healing practitioners out there, I want to better connect them to the people who need their help. When we live in a world where so many people are stuck in unresolved trauma, I want to make healing and empowerment more accessible.
Are there any books, videos or other content that you feel have meaningfully impacted your thinking?
I just devoured the book Four Thousand Weeks: Time Management for Mortals, written by author Oliver Burkeman. I read all the time, but never have I read a book and gasped so many times, that OMG feeling that this author is speaking directly to me. I am exactly who this book is written for.
As a recovering insecure overachiever, my entire life is spent striving for what’s next and a future version of myself and my dreams. This book really helps one reframe their motivation and relationship to time. I am constantly on the journey to redefine a new, healthy relationship to ambition. This book provides an excellent philoshophical framework in that pursuit.
Can you share a story from your journey that illustrates your resilience?
I have a M.A. in Applied Gender Studies and have volunteered for years as a rape crisis counselor. During the many drunken nights in my past, I had a variety of unwanted sexual experiences. I normalized the violations because I did not stand up for myself.
But in 2017, two weeks before #MeToo went viral, I finally found the courage to call my rape a rape. As a DEI professional, I felt morally obligated to speak out. At San Francisco’s Chan Zuckerberg Hospital, I made a Facebook Live from the emergency room explaining the process to survivors and encouraging them to utilize this resource. Yes, I felt guilt and shame, but I did not allow those feelings to prevent me from speaking my truth.
The video has over 40,000 views. Many survivors have opened up to me and shared how my story helped them heal in their journey. While it was difficult to be so publicly vulnerable, I know doing so has deeply helped others. I am in the process of writing a book about my entire empowerment journey.
Contact Info:
- Website: https://www.pamelaoleary.com/
- Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/olearypd/
- Linkedin: https://www.linkedin.com/in/poleary
- Twitter: https://twitter.com/olearypd