Alright – so today we’ve got the honor of introducing you to Norine Fahie. We think you’ll enjoy our conversation, we’ve shared it below.
Hi Norine, thanks for joining us today. Let’s start with the story of your mission. What should we know?
As the founder and host of the Save Our Sisters Group and the Save Our Sisters Unplugged Podcast, my mission is to help women of all ages use their voices to free themselves by sharing their survival to success stories. This was created from a need to provide support and a source of strength and safety for women who may be feeling alone in their life struggles. We will stand in the gap together…heels on the ground to provide a nonjudgmental environment where women are supported while they reclaim their strength and embrace the stronger woman they’re becoming.
This stems from growing up in a conservative environment where you were seen and not heard. My father was a very hard man to please and live with. There was a lot of abuse on all levels in the home for a long time, and it seemed like it would never end. We would look to mom for help, but my mother didn’t seem to know how to cushion any of it. This was at a time when women looked the other way and elected to stay married as opposed to correcting their husbands or getting a divorce. We were forbidden to interact with others and lived a very controlled lifestyle of abuse and feelings of worthlessness. There was no one to tell of what was happening in the home, and of course, we were ‘trained’ not to tell…or else!
As a result of the abuse, at the age of 13, I was removed from the home and placed in foster care. They were not kind people. My foster mother’s brother tried to force himself on me and no one reported it. He was gone the next day, but she never apologized and never asked if I was ok. Instead, she searched my room, found my diary, and proceeded to make me out to be a whore. I spent two years in foster care until a family member stepped up to take me away. It was not a good decision because her husband beat her on an almost nightly basis and was a bully to all of us. This left me wondering why she took me in in the first place. I recently asked her why and 1st she said she wanted family around her. Then she came clean and said she thought he would stop beating her if others were around. None of those explanations had my best interest at heart. I felt like I was a shield to protect someone who was supposed to protect me. I endured the most abuse in my life while I lived there. It was only after a year of being there and another family member took me in that was I able to feel some semblance of safety. She helped to build me back up and showed me that I was worthy. I still had years of rebuilding to work through before I truly believed I was tho. After all that, I still didn’t speak of anything I had been through because I felt no one cared. My voice wasn’t important.
Despite my life struggles, abuse, and countless unpredictable setbacks where I was silenced, I did the healing work and trusted in my ability to grow and thrive, and I overcame every obstacle. I found my voice after asking myself, “why are you protecting these people who had no regard for what they put you through? You were a child!” That realization propelled me to share my story and start my mission to convince others to cleanse themselves by sharing theirs.
Awesome – so before we get into the rest of our questions, can you briefly introduce yourself to our readers.
Wah gwaan Kings and Queens! My name is Norine. In the Latin and Irish derivation, the name Norine means “woman of honor”, which is fitting for who I am at the core. How insightful of my parents! I am Virgin Islands-born, and trauma raised. I walk to the beat of my own drum, and I don’t care about what others think of me. I have thick skin, but a warm heart and a beautiful soul. I’m unapologetically me! I’m also a Gemini. I love long walks on the beach a good book and a good glass of wine! :)
In all seriousness, I’m a Christian woman with a passion for helping other women of all ages to tap into their power. I enjoy meeting them and hearing how they overcame their challenges. I’ve met the most amazing women through my group podcast and some of us stay in touch to date. I believe sharing your trauma stories is a direct benefit to sustainable mental health. By freeing yourself and sharing your stories you’re addressing the trauma that can adversely impact your future in a positive way. I have been an advocate of mental health because I would like to normalize it and change the stigma that mental health is not important. I’ve been through so many things in my life where I was forced to keep silent about family secrets. Secrets make you sick and when unaddressed can lead to long-term deficits in your life. Addressing your issues appropriately by talking about what happened to you helps you regain control of your life.
Any stories or insights that might help us understand how you’ve built such a strong reputation?
Wow…I’m still figuring things out and building my reputation is definitely a journey. As a podcaster, I’m learning that in addition to your marketing strategy, whom you know will also help to build your reputation. I have been positioning myself in the path of others that are already established. I pay attention to how and when they are marketing themselves and I emulate that. I ask a ton of questions and I get into communities like Clubhouse and try to build as many relationships as possible with seasoned people. I’ve learned there are many who are willing to give me tips so I can build a solid reputation that will give me the credibility I need. I am very intentional with whom I invite as guests on my podcast and whose podcast I am the guest.
On solo episodes where I don’t have a guest, I am the expert. I speak to topics that are still aligned with my niche and purpose, and I always leave tips and a plethora of information they can use in their daily life. Some of my solo topics are SMART goal setting, forgiveness, self-reflection, overcoming rejection, and preparing to be a wife to name a few. The topics I choose are relatable, as we all have stories. I share my authentic self and I’m as vulnerable as my guests. As a result, people gravitate toward me and they believe in my vision. I am still on the journey, but I am willing to go wherever it takes me.
Let’s talk about resilience next – do you have a story you can share with us?
I believe my divorce is the best demonstration of resilience. If you want to know how someone feels about you, try to divorce them! The divorce was easy as it relates to the legalities because all we had was a child together, but emotionally it took a toll. In the marriage, I rarely heard my name because I was called the “B” word so many times that I can’t stand to hear it now. I was belittled and accused of unspeakable things. I fought for my marriage for a year. Things came to a head when I asked him if I did what he did in the marriage what would he do. He said, “I’d divorce you!” It was as if a switch in my mind was flipped and said, “girl move on”! I was tired of trying. It takes two to make it work and clearly, he wasn’t trying to do that.
The more I tried to move on with my life, the more interesting things got. I would be supermom by day and make things happen, but at night when my children slept, I cried. I had no family and a few good friends as a solid support system. After I got my divorce and had mourned it, I decided to pick myself up because I needed to be strong for my kids. I enrolled in school BBS bound and focused on more income to support my family. Despite being stalked and threatened I persevered and graduated. I didn’t want my kids to see how much the divorce affected me. I wanted them to understand they can go through something tough, they can overcome it, and have a normal life again.
I had to be resilient because although this bent me, it didn’t break me. Not on my watch! My thoughts were, I HAD to be strong by any means necessary because I was raising a King and 2 Queens, so I did whatever I could to ensure I handled this the right way. I refused to be intimidated! I refused to be ridiculed! I refused to be ridiculed or ashamed of a failed marriage! I have to take my power back! I have to make it in a state where I have no family! I have to be an example for my children! I had to prove to that little girl inside of me that I can make it on my own with 3 children even when the world was telling me I couldn’t! So, if it meant I needed to work 2 jobs (equated to 7 days a week), raise 3 kids, and put myself through college, so be it. So, I did!
Contact Info:
- Website: https://open.spotify.com/show/3sk92brhrBgm563Ne7VQXn?si=779cd286572a4df7
- Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/saveoursisters_2020
- Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/groups/1198798443647375/
- Linkedin: https://www.linkedin.com/in/norine-fahie-68905813b/
- Youtube: (1371) Save Our Sisters S.O.S. – YouTube
- Other: Email: [email protected]