We’re excited to introduce you to the always interesting and insightful Nick Bognar. We hope you’ll enjoy our conversation with Nick below.
Nick, thanks for taking the time to share your stories with us today Do you think your parents have had a meaningful impact on you and your journey?
My parents are confident and firm in their beliefs, but they also believe that good rules stand up to scrutiny. As a result, they always made room for me to question their rules- even if there was no chance I was going to prevail on them to change!
When I consider integrity in beliefs, I think about my parents’ relationship with religion. Both of my parents are devout Catholics, but they have left the church before in order to make a principled stand. When they returned, it was because they felt they had found a branch of the church whose values were consistent with its practices.
As a child, my mother knew I didn’t enjoy going to Catholic service and gave me the option to go to any house of worship that I wanted, as long as I was doing something. I appreciated her flexibility and openness to allowing me to experience other things. She knew that me finding something that fit my values was more important than me subscribing to her beliefs specifically.
Once I turned 16, plans started being made for me to take the sacrament of Confirmation, which is where one swears to god and the world that one will be an observant Catholic for the rest of their life. I knew this wouldn’t be the case for me, and I told my mother that I would prefer not to tell a lie to her (or God, or anyone else), and she respected that.
I don’t think people think of that kind of openness when they think of the Catholic Church, but my parents really walked the walk, and as a result I think I’m stronger in my morals and convictions than I might have been had I been forced into that relationship.
Now, as a therapist, I understand that one of the most psychologically uncomfortable things people do is live outside their values. I understand that part of my job is to help people’s lives align more closely with their values, and that those values might be different than mine.
Great, appreciate you sharing that with us. Before we ask you to share more of your insights, can you take a moment to introduce yourself and how you got to where you are today to our readers.
In a previous career, I was an executive, and on paper things were very good. I was paid well, I had a boss I liked, the people who worked for me were wonderful, and all my needs were met. I was as puzzled as anyone that I was so miserable.
Eventually, I sought out therapy for the anxiety that seemed to follow me around everywhere. We worked with the anxiety, but a huge portion of what was bothering me was situational- I didn’t like being an executive. I didn’t want to do what I was doing, and that wasn’t a problem- it was just the truth.
That therapist helped me get out of that career, and the next therapist helped me figure out that I really wanted to be doing what SHE was doing- asking important questions, skipping the small talk, and getting to the heart of what really gives people purpose and meaning. I get to use humor and learn about people’s passions- what could be better than that?
Now, my life is different- I love my work, I truly enjoy working with my clients, and I cherish the changes that people see in my life. Very few of my clients have become therapists themselves, but I hope my zest for the field is clear to them.
Can you tell us about what’s worked well for you in terms of growing your clientele?
Hands down, the way I’ve built my business is through relationships. I love meeting other clinicians, and therefore every time I meet someone in my field, there’s a decent chance that I’m making a friend. Even if we’re not close, I want to know about people’s work and the things that make them successful with their clients. This serves two purposes: The first is that now wherever I go (professionally), I have friends. The second is, I always have wonderful referrals to offer to clients when my practice is full, which is most of the time now. I take people’s mental health very seriously, and so when someone calls me and I can’t work with them, I do my damnedest to give them a referral to someone who is going to be a great fit for them.
That might seem altruistic, but it’s mostly not-I look like a GENIUS when I make a good referral, and I get to help the business of someone I care about. And gratefully, because I take care to support other people’s businesses, they have been very kind and considerate in sending me good-fit business in return.
People cringe when I say this word, but all that boils down to networking. And as sleazy as people think that is, it’s nothing more than building positive and nutritive relationships with other professionals and helping clients get connected with the clinicians who will do the best work for them rather than being scared or competitive. I can’t recommend it highly enough. I actually have a (small) coaching offering for other therapists called Action Practice Building where I teach them how to make those win/win/win relationships. When I help other clinicians learn the relationship-marketing model (done ethically), I love seeing how excited they get when they realize that they don’t have to compete with their colleagues anymore. We can be friends, and we can all have full practices!
Are there any books, videos, essays or other resources that have significantly impacted your management and entrepreneurial thinking and philosophy?
If you ever read a book called “Winning” by Jack Welch, then you can get a good lesson in how never to do anything, ever. I read it early in my executive career at the suggestion of a boss who thought it was brilliant. Even back then (when it was current), I thought it was disgusting and deleterious in the extreme. Welch’s model was to serve shareholders above all else, and to create situations where workers were literally put in the position of competing each other under the consistent threat of downsizing.
Now, in my practice, I employ 5-6 prelicensed therapists and I teach them to support one another actively, as well as other members of the therapeutic community. I do my best to make sure that they don’t feel pressures to meet goals other than reasonably optimal client outcomes. I see my supervisory role as someone who helps people build their careers (at a stage when they really need it), provides jobs, and helps clients receive excellent therapy whenever possible.
And it turns out you can do just fine with that business model- you don’t have to abuse and scare the shit out of people to be successful.
Contact Info:
- Website: www.nickbognartherapy.com
- Instagram: @nickbognarmft
Image Credits
Photos by Becca Murray