We recently connected with Nathalie Bonafé and have shared our conversation below.
Hi Nathalie, thanks for joining us today. Let’s start with a story that highlights an important way in which your brand diverges from the industry standard.
In a world of geopolitical tensions, economical insecurities, burnouts, fake persona and artificial intelligence, I believe in simple human values. In the business world, we often hear about the importance of technical skills, qualifications, and the ability to produce results. While, without any doubts, these aspects play a crucial role in one’s professional journey, my years of experience have taught me that there’s something even more fundamental to achieving success: working well with others, having an attitude of service, and, above all, being kind. Kindness is needed now more than ever.
I work with individuals at times of extreme vulnerability, and I need to be able to meet them where they are in their journey, with extreme tact. They are not numbers; they are human beings who need to be listened to, and guided with upmost respect and dignity. Brené Browns talks a lot about vulnerability. She says “Rarely can a response make something better; what makes something better is connection. To create that connection, actions can often speak louder than words”. As a professional consultant/coach, I provide the actions that make the person feel heard and seen, before I can even give them the information they need to tackle their specific situation. It takes a bit of time and emotional intelligence to establish that trust and come up with a personalized plan that will truly empower them and make a difference in their life.
Example: When I work with a person during their menopause transition, it is not rare for me to identify past traumas or grief related to having lost a mother for instance that have been preventing that person from dealing properly with their own health challenges. I am able to help them with their mindset by tending to their specific emotions. A medical provider, even specialized in menopause, is unlikely to have the time to discuss their fears. And yet those fears get in the way when this woman is trying to advocate for herself. Likewise, a psychologist, a hospice social worker, or even chaplain, are unlikely to offer any sort of support when a daughter going through menopause transition is about to lose her mother. I feel I fill the gaps in care with special skills that no other professional can provide, in the current healthcare system. And in a short period of time, my client is able to tackle her grief, her own health concerns, and get back to her life feeling empowered.
Awesome – so before we get into the rest of our questions, can you briefly introduce yourself to our readers.
I have always been curious about how things worked at the microscopic level, anything under the surface, invisible to the eye. I have no idea where this is coming from as no one in my family had ever had a scientific career. I spend the first 25 years of my professional life in the biomedical research field, which led me to move to the United States when I was 26 years old (I am originally from France). I trained/worked for large organizations like the National Institutes of Health and the Yale School of Medicine, and then moved to the biotech industry after I obtained my Green Card, choosing smaller companies. I’ve always preferred small and mighty collaborative teams, and horizontal leadership that depends on reciprocity and trust rather than the structured corporate hierarchy. When I could not progress further in my previous company, I decided to build a solo consulting practice, building on my strengths and vision to create more clarity, focus, perspective and empathy into our culture.
My business/brand is in line with my purpose to be of service to others in times of vulnerability, and my mission is to change the conversation about living well, aging well, and dying well, one person at a time.
I believe that each of us has the right to know about options and possibilities as we age. And I am combining my analytical skills with emotional intelligence to support people during two major and yet underserved transitions: Menopause and end-of-life.
When people receive a life-threatening diagnosis, such as cancer, they become numb, petrified, they become hyper-rational and rigid, and fail to self-determine with clarity. It’s not just the individual but most often the entire family/support structure that is shaken. That’s where I come in to provide an impartial, non-judgmental, holistic, educated, professional, and supportive presence that is separate from anyone else in the healthcare system. I don’t provide medical support, but I help them understand the situation, navigate the system, and advocate for themselves based on their own values. (www.agentlerparting.com)
My experience helping seniors, combined with my knowledge of human biology, quickly led me to realize that there were reasons why women failed to plan for their golden years and end of life. It’s because they had already failed to be proactive at midlife. You see, Menopause Transition offers a unique opportunity for women to learn to advocate for themselves, to get empowered, and take charge of their lives and to live well until the end, with love and legacy in mind. I therefore opened another branch to my business to educate and support women at mid-life, from peri-menopause to post-menopause more smoothly. (www.nathaliebonafe.com)
I am very proud of having found that connection so I can now work with women of all ages, through Menopause, grief and end of life planning.
Let’s talk about resilience next – do you have a story you can share with us?
We live in a death phobic society. So when I first got certified as a professional end-of-life guide aka death doula and started my own business, people around me had very strong and even adverse reactions. From family members, to community members, few took me seriously, would want to discuss my practice and services, better yet, most avoided me or even turned their back to me, as if helping people live with dignity and prepare for their final steps was something dirty or morally wrong. What I first felt was actually pure fear. I was just breaking old taboos.
When I started talking about women’s health and educating about the menopause transition being critical to healthy aging, I received similar messages, as if women did not deserve to age well. I kept breaking more taboos, and people were very uncomfortable with it, giving me the silent treatment.
But I persevered. I kept showing up. I took that opportunity to better myself, to sharpen my skills, to grow stronger, more confident and even kinder, and to develop my business, and serve my clients.
Over the years, public awareness has grown and I started to feel less lonely. The pandemic helped my business go remote, consulting 1:1 mostly via zoom. I have since resumed in-person coaching, public presentations and workshops. I also do some pro-bono work with other colleagues to push for integrations of death doulas in the healthcare system. I am busy. I am proud of my accomplishments.
Any stories or insights that might help us understand how you’ve built such a strong reputation?
I go slowly, and keep showing up, with authenticity and honesty, with commitment to bettering the world, one person, one family at a time.
Contact Info:
- Website: Menopause Work: www.nathaliebonafe.com; End-of Life Work: www.agentlerparting.com
- Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/nath_bonafe/
- Facebook: Menoapause: https://www.facebook.com/nathaliemlbonafe/; End of Life: https://www.facebook.com/agentlerparting/
- Linkedin: www.linkedin.com/in/nathalie-bonafé
- Youtube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC1r-o6NNDfUJqtjWtKNpyXQ
- Other: I host free online monthly conversations, as part of my pro-bono work. Menopause Cafe Connecticut: https://www.eventbrite.com/cc/menopause-cafe-connecticut-community-134139 Life and Death Cafe: https://www.eventbrite.com/cc/life-death-cafe-community-by-nathalie-1490969
Image Credits
I have the right to all the photos taken, but I like to give written credit to the photographers: The featured one was taken by Gerry Wenner. The one around the cafe table is also from Gerry Wenner. The one where I were a blue and white shirt were taken by my brand photographer: Peter SennYuen (Medicalbound)