We were lucky to catch up with Natalie Jo Wright recently and have shared our conversation below.
Natalie Jo, appreciate you joining us today. I’m sure there have been days where the challenges of being an artist or creative force you to think about what it would be like to just have a regular job. When’s the last time you felt that way? Did you have any insights from the experience?
My entire adult life my jobs have been there to support my art. Before having my son 12 years ago, I would come home from work and head straight to the studio. For many years I worked part-time to support my art. During the pandemic (like many of us) I took the leap to full-time artist. I’m going on year three of making ends meet. I can’t imagine doing anything else. I do not have a savings account. I don’t have a retirement plan. I can’t take nice vacations or go out to fancy restaurants. I cannot afford the artwork that I sell. I don’t qualify to purchase my own home, so I rent. I don’t have a partner (or a trust fund) to support me. I am not represented by a gallery, so I have to find other creative ways to get my art seen locally. But I love what I do and every day is a gift. This job doesn’t come with security and of course there are times when the predictability of a consistent paycheck sounds amazing. This last year I started working 2 days a week at a local gallery and it’s been the best compliment to my studio practice. I work with other professional artists and get to be surrounded by amazing talent. I am still a full-time artist and a full-time single parent. The hills and valleys of navigating this life takes a lot of grit. There might come a day where I will need to pivot and I have to stay open to that. I know I am privileged to get to do what I do. Every day I am grateful. And I’m stubborn. I see people working jobs they don’t like, living for the weekends, for the vacations, for the fine dining, for the nice cars and two car garages, and of course that sounds nice. But in the end, I know this is the life for me as long as I can swing it.
Great, appreciate you sharing that with us. Before we ask you to share more of your insights, can you take a moment to introduce yourself and how you got to where you are today to our readers
Nature/Nurture. I was born into an artist family and most certainly encouraged to paint, draw and write at a young age. I identified myself as “artist” by the time I was 6 and I suppose I’ve been chasing for it’s meaning my entire life. Now that I am well into my 40’s and have spent more than half my life searching for its meaning- I feel I have a pretty good grasp on what I am bringing to the table. I grew up surrounded by alcoholics and emotional neglect. I became a people pleaser at a young age and became very good at reading the room to keep me safe. I spent a lot of time alone and maybe becoming a studio artist can come as no surprise. We spend a lot of time alone. But taking criticism was hard and those long art school critiques had me spiraling out into shame and only intensified my low self esteem. Depression, anxiety, the ups and downs of mental illness. But like I mentioned before, there is a lot of stubborn and grit in me and so I have persevered. There has never been a time in the last 25 years where I have not been creating. I’ve been writing and making no matter what life threw at me. Having a child and becoming a single parent came with all the expected road blocks, but it’s also come with immense teachings. Self respect, self love, vulnerability, gratitude. Learning how to feel emotions and not run from them. This brings us to my most recent body of work. It’s a series of self portraits I started in 2020. The inspiration is my journey through healing. I will be having a solo show (I’m renting the space) in Fall of 2023 in Madison, Wisconsin featuring my paintings (oil on paper) and pencil/charcoal drawings.
Leading up to this body of work as been large scale paintings on paper of wildlife and wild humans. mostly musicians. For the past 8-9 years I’ve been exploring my own self worth through the process of painting animals (birds, etc) larger than life. Bison, Bear, Owl, Fox, Wolf, Sparrow, Hawk. Now I am stretching a little, taking a risk, by expanding my subject matter. I’m getting more vulnerable. I’m getting more personal. I’m excited to see where the two will begin to merge.
I’ve also been painting pet portraits for the past 8 years. It is never something I set out to do. Someone asked if I would paint a large scale portrait of their dog and the rest is beautiful history unfolding. There is a lot of stigma attached to “fine artists” who do “pet portraits”. Those not in the art world might find that to be a little confusing. But those of us IN the art world are nodding our heads. Yup. This is what keeps my bills paid and I ABSOLUTELY LOVE IT. I know there is no other connection like the one we have with our pets. And I get to capture that spirit. That unconditional love. It’s always such an honor to be chosen. I love it when I get to meet the pet, or at least hear a favorite story and little bits of their personality. If you were a fly in the room you would likely catch me talking to the painting. It’s truly an act of joy. No art snob in the world could convince me otherwise.
Learning and unlearning are both critical parts of growth – can you share a story of a time when you had to unlearn a lesson?
The lessons I had to unlearn stem from childhood. I had to unlearn that my safety doesn’t rely on everybody liking me. I had to unlearn the negative self beliefs- that I am bad or unworthy. I had to learn that the things that brought me shame are no longer valid. I had to learn how to reparent myself. How to love my body and to be my own best friend. Growing up with alcoholism and emotional neglect, you become the “easy” kid who stays out of the way and knows how to read a room. You become the one in charge when the adults are no longer coherent. You spend a lot of time alone. You trust very little, let alone yourself. You look to others for validation and approval. You don’t know what you like- you only like it if others like it- then you can feel safe.
What does this have to do with art making? Everything! Art making is vulnerability. It is trusting yourself. If not, it’s just approval seeking. It’s doing something because others have told you that you were good at it- not because you believe it to be true.
We’d love to hear a story of resilience from your journey.
Metacognition. The act of listening to your thoughts. Paying attention. That is deep soul work. Looking back at a childhood that you have rose colored your entire life so that you feel safe and realizing that it wasn’t as perfect as the story you created. This process is not for the weak of heart. It’s the hero’s journey that no one else can see you are going through. It’s a lonely journey, abstract and full of self gaslighting at every turn. Sometimes sinking felt like the only way to escape because you never felt what is was like to truly grieve or to let yourself feel anger. Expressing emotions was never safe. Hiding behind ego, tattoos, making myself tough. And I am tough. You have to be to do this work. To admit to all of your faults and to how you have hurt people on the path to get here. Self forgiveness and letting in the joy. Joy takes vulnerability also.
So here I am. The negative self beliefs are like ghosts now but not haunting ones. They show up and my awareness is the gift that just keeps on giving. Growth is infinite. Triggers are lessons. I have been given a new life. A new way of seeing myself and my role as a mom, an artist, a friend, a daughter.
The work I create from here on out is not to please others, but to challenge myself. To open up and see what’s inside. My story is not unique. But when I share my story, it gives others permission. It gives others the chance to see themselves and to know they are not alone.
Contact Info:
- Website: www.nataliejowright.com
- Instagram: @nataliejowrightart
- Facebook: Natalie Jo Wright Artist
Image Credits
All but two of the photos (I think it’s pretty obvious which ones ;)) Are by photographer Paulius Musteikis