We recently connected with Nancy Jean Hudley and have shared our conversation below.

Alright, Nancy Jean thanks for taking the time to share your stories and insights with us today. Looking back at internships and apprenticeships can be interesting, because there is so much variety in people’s experiences – and often those experiences inform our own leadership style. Do you have an interesting story from that stage of your career that you can share with us?

My internship was not titled as such. I first started volunteering in the Rape Crisis Center at Grady Memorial Hospital.
For three years I spent 24 a month supporting rape victims as they went through this very challenging and demeaning process. It was there that I learned (1990) that 18% of males were sexually abused before the age of 18. I witnessed young men being brought to emergency who were assisted by male CASAs. That experience was truly an education. Not to mention, the number of men who never tell it. Along with my life experience raising my three children alone, two of which are males, those experience actually rooted the seed and watered it while volunteering as a CASA (Court Appointed Special Advocate) for Fulton County Juvenile Court. There I served as a case manager, and the eyes and ears of the court, similar to DFACS (Department of Families and Children’s Services) case managers for the state. However, this was a non-paid program, I volunteered with for 8 years. I was responsible for going out to shelters, group and foster care homes where children had been placed, to make sure they were getting the services their care takers were getting paid to provide. I also acted as the personal advocate for the child, who could share with me anything that was happening that could jeopardize their safety. With one of my reports, I held DFACS accountable and so did the judge, who ultimately, scolded them and then closed the facility down. I saw children sleeping on the floor in state shelters! I couldn’t believe it. Parents smoking around babies in a house I couldn’t breath in and I smoked. Moreover, I saw organizations getting funding for services they were not providing. So, I decided to “try” smile and do a better job, once I learned … so much of what I didn’t know.

As always, we appreciate you sharing your insights and we’ve got a few more questions for you, but before we get to all of that can you take a minute to introduce yourself and give our readers some of your back background and context?

I was young parent raising 2 young men and a daughter on my own. I have always been someone other people wanted to talk to about their problems. So therefore, when my children’s friends (primarily the boys) ran away, they would come to my house and I would call their parents to let them know they were safe, and I would get them back hopefully, better than the way they left. I never would dreamed in 1 million years that I would doing what I do. Smile
Most of the children I have dealt with had low self esteem, self worth, and suffered with depression. I have suffered with the same symtoms, so it’s been a no brainer for me. I do a great job of encouraging and motivating most anyone to step out of their comfort zones and not be afraid to stumble, because it is only stumblers that win. Moreover, I have used my own challenges as a way to let them that we all have them. No matter, what we look like. Further, I walk beside my kids, because many times they need help and are too prideful or insecure to say it. I tell them how important they are to their parents, even though they may act like it, and to me. I hug and love on them even when they p___ me off. LOL – I never dismiss them without welcoming them back in my space. We also take them out of town for weekend retreats where they learn technical skills while they play. They get 3 meals a day, and sometimes 4. A young man just called me 3 days before Father’s Day and told me he had been looking for me for a while, but he obviously was spelling our organization’s name wrong, so google was sending him to different state. He was 16 when I last say him and his brother. He screamed saying “Ms. Jean, I said yes, He said thank God do you know how long I’ve been looking for you? I didn’t even know who he was. LOL But, he is now 24 and a mechanic for Toyota. I was so happy to hear that. He on to tell me the different ways our program affected the positive outcome of his life. He is a father of 1, with one on the way with the same woman!! That’s what I live for. There are too many more stories to tell, and some of which are not good. But I had to accept that some people have to learn the hard way. And you know what, if they live through it, they turn out to be some great individuals. I work with several of them today.

Let’s talk about resilience next – do you have a story you can share with us?

During the market crash, I couldn’t get anyone to help me with a space to provide programming. There were so many vacant store fronts and office spaces, that could have been written off because of our non-profit status. I was clerk at Fulton County Superior Court and quit because for me the environment was so negative, especially in the last dept I worked in, which was closed files. So I needed to something to change the narrative. I prepared in ways that I thought could take care of me while developing this program. But everything seemed to stop. The referrals I depended on from DFACS, stopped just as suddenly as the market change. So, I owned my own home and had a on car garage. So, I turned into a classroom. Had it painted orange — lol — posted the 10 commandments, 50 things you didn’t know about Barack Obama, photos president who were identified as bi-racial = more white than black, and then made tri-folds and knocked on every door in my subdivision and told these parent about my program, and our upcoming launch. It was crazy because most of the people that answered the door were women and they looked at me as if to say, I am not sending my son to your house. They didn’t know I had lobbied 5 men that I knew to help me teach these classes 3 days a week, Well only 4 kids (from 2 families) showed up. We treated them royally, fed them and listened to them. Three weeks later I had 18 kids in my house. I couldn’t keep them in the garage, not five minutes after class was over. We always fed them and took them on field trips. That experience opened the door to greater opportunities. I absolutely, loved that time.

What’s a lesson you had to unlearn and what’s the backstory?

I had to unlearn the thought that there was only one way to skin a cat. Smile. I had learn that the fact that I didn’t know everything, I was accepted by all, was not reason to do what I could with what I had.

Contact Info:

• Website: https://boys2mengirls2win.org
• Instagram: @Boys2menGirls2Win
• Facebook: Boys2MenGirls2Win
• Twitter: Twitter & IG @Boys2MenGirls2Win /Boys2menforlife?s
• Youtube: @boys2menhomeandsanctuaryfo954 /@njeanhudley235

Image Credits

I certify that I have rights & permission for the personal images in Part 7 of the form.