We caught up with the brilliant and insightful Monica Gagne a few weeks ago and have shared our conversation below.
Hi Monica, thanks for joining us today. Can you talk to us about a risk you’ve taken – walk us through the story?
As a kid I used to hide in my closet and cry. Deep down, I carried this quiet, powerful knowing that one day I would figure out how to heal myself, and then it would be my mission to help others heal too. But as I grew older, I got swept up in the way society conditions women to be “good girls” – to please others at our own expense, to be realistic, to set our dreams aside and follow the path that looks safe on the outside. I tried to go along with it. I got the 9-5, I played the part, but inside, I was crumbling and barely holding it together. I reached a point in my twenties where I didn’t want to be on this earth anymore, and I knew something seriously had to change. So I took the biggest risk of my life: I quit my job and threw myself fully into my healing journey. I had no clear roadmap, no guarantee it would work, and no one really understood what I was doing. But I knew I couldn’t keep living a life that wasn’t mine.
In that process, I returned to the things that had always brought me comfort and joy like creativity and art, and I let myself reconnect with that part of me. Art became a safe place to process my pain and start imagining the life I wanted to create.
Taking the risk of choosing myself over other’s expectations changed everything. I began to heal, to find my voice, and to step into my purpose of helping others on their own healing journeys. Looking back, the scariest step I ever took was the first one: choosing to walk away from the life I was “supposed” to live in order to build the one my soul had always been calling me toward.
Monica, before we move on to more of these sorts of questions, can you take some time to bring our readers up to speed on you and what you do?
I’m a healing and spiritual empowerment guide and artist passionate about helping empathic old souls break free from painful patterns that keep them stuck and step into the lives they’ve always dreamed of living.
My journey into this work began with my own deep healing. Through years of deep inner healing work, spiritual study, and creative exploration, I discovered the practices and insights that not only changed my life but became the foundation for my work with others.
Today, I offer my signature coaching program, called Transforming Shadows into Gold. A 12 week group coaching program for Empathic Old Soul’s who are ready to break free from painful patterns that keep you stuck and anxious and step into deep healing and self-love. My clients often come to me feeling weighed down by patterns like people-pleasing, self-doubt, over-giving, or feeling stuck in cycles such as toxic relationships or addictions that don’t serve them. Through a combination of guided inner work, soul-level coaching, and practical tools for emotional freedom, I help them shift those shadows into strengths, into gold.
As an Artist, I create fluid black-and-white abstract art pieces with 18k gold leaf embellishments that visually represent this same journey: the beauty of emotional alchemy… transforming darkness into light, pain into power. Each piece is a reminder that even our hardest moments hold the potential for healing, and that moving through them awakens our power to consciously create the life we desire.
What sets my work apart is the integration of deep healing, creative energy, and authentic transformation. I’ve walked this path myself, and I know how isolating and heavy it can feel to be stuck in your shadows, especially as an empathic kind-hearted woman. My greatest pride comes from watching a client release their old pain and rise into their radiance.
The main thing I want people to know about me and my brand is that healing is not only possible, but it can be profoundly empowering. My mission is to guide people to discover that truth within themselves, both through my coaching and my art.
Can you share a story from your journey that illustrates your resilience?
One of the most profound demonstrations of my resilience comes from breaking free of a long-standing pattern of toxic relationships with narcissistic types. For years, I found myself repeating this cycle. Even after becoming aware of it, I still felt stuck. But with each experience, I practiced deep self-compassion and consciously worked on making different choices than I had in the past. Slowly, I became stronger, clearer, and more grounded in my boundaries.
The turning point came with the last relationship of this kind. I had been briefly dating someone and began noticing the familiar red flags – subtle manipulation, emotional games, and a lack of accountability. One day, after something he did upset me, I tried to communicate my feelings. In response, he unleashed every manipulative tactic imaginable: gaslighting, playing the victim, and twisting the situation back onto me.
In that moment, I had a breakthrough. I could see the pattern as it was happening and instead of being pulled into the toxic dance, I chose to step out. I ended the conversation and the relationship right then.
However, my resilience was tested further when he began coming into my workplace to try to engage with me. I set a clear boundary and asked him not to, but he ignored it. That’s when I learned an important lesson about boundaries: they aren’t about controlling someone else, they’re about how you respond. I chose to protect my energy by leaning on my co-workers to help him instead of me when possible and when not possible by practicing the “gray rock” method, which means responding minimally and without emotion. Eventually, I decided to leave that job altogether, fully releasing myself from the environment and the dynamic.
This experience was incredibly painful, but it also marked the moment I truly broke free and stepped out of the pattern for good by reclaimed my power, and now I am in a healthy, loving relationship. More importantly, I emerged with a deep understanding of toxic dynamics and the tools to help others break free too. It was a journey of resilience that transformed my pain into wisdom and strength.
What’s a lesson you had to unlearn and what’s the backstory?
The biggest lesson I had to unlearn was people-pleasing and the guilt that comes with setting boundaries. For most of my life, I believed that being a “good girl” meant putting everyone else’s needs above my own, even if it meant abandoning myself. As a sensitive, empathic person, I was deeply in tune with the emotions of others – often more than I was with my own.
Looking back, I can see that this pattern began in childhood. Being hyper-aware of others’ feelings felt like a form of safety. If someone in the room was upset, my energy would immediately go to trying to fix or soothe them. I later realized this was a form of fawning, an unconscious survival mechanism that made me feel safer by keeping other people happy. In my mind, if they’re happy, then I can be safe too.
On my healing journey, I started to unravel this pattern and understand that people-pleasing was not truly serving me or the people around me. When I constantly met others’ needs at the expense of my own, I not only abandoned myself and felt resentful which caused tension in the relationship, I also unintentionally enabled others to stay small. By shielding them from discomfort or the natural consequences of their actions, I wasn’t allowing them to grow.
The turning point came with a powerful perspective shift, that setting boundaries is one of the most loving things I can do for both myself and others. Boundaries honor my well-being while giving others the opportunity to take responsibility for their own lives. This understanding helped me release the guilt I used to feel when someone tried to make me the “villain” for having limits.
Now, this is something I guide my clients through as well. My clients are sensitive, empathic souls who struggle with people-pleasing and self-abandonment. Together, we work on creating healthy boundaries, building self-trust, and stepping into authentic self-expression. These skills aren’t just life-changing on a personal level, they are essential for creating a successful, sustainable business too. Without boundaries, you end up drained, over-giving, and resentful. With them, you create space for aligned opportunities, healthy relationships, and the freedom to fully step into your purpose.
If you would like to learn more about how to work with me, you can go to my website: MonicaGoldSoul.com or reach out via email at [email protected]
Contact Info:
- Website: https://MonicaGoldSoul.com
- Instagram: @MonicaGoldSoul
