We recently connected with Mona Spellman-Benjamin and have shared our conversation below.
Alright, Mona thanks for taking the time to share your stories and insights with us today. We’d love to hear the backstory behind a risk you’ve taken – whether big or small, walk us through what it was like and how it ultimately turned out.
I AM A SINGLE PARENT DIVORCED MOTHER OF FIVE. I AM FIGHTING TO HAVE MY TWO YOUNGEST CHILDREN RETURNED AFTER GOING THROUGH A GRUESOME DIVORCE. I HAVE RESEARCHED THE TOPIC OF CONSTITUTIONAL RIGHTS VIOLATIONS AND THE RIGHTS PARENTS HAVE TO RAISE THEIR CHILDREN WITHOUT UNNECESSARY GOVERNMENT INTERFERENCE. THUS FAR I HAVE WORKED TO RAISE AWARENESS AND PROMOTE FAMILY REUNIFICATION. THE BIGGEST CHALLENGE HAS BEEN BEING WITHOUT MY CHILDREN AND HAVING THEM SEPARATED FOR THE LAST FOUR YEARS WHILE I AM LEFT TO FIGHT THE BUREAUCRAY OF THE COURTS. THE ISSUES WHICH HAVE A RISEN WHILE BEING SEPARATED ARE BONDING RELATED AND SCARY. I THINK CHILDREN MIGHT SEE THEMSELVES AS HAVING SOMETHING WRONG WITH THEM IF THEIR PARENT IS N’T THERE AND IT DAMAGES THOSE RELATIONSHIPS AT TIMES. MY YOUNGEST WHO IS SEVEN HAS MOMENTS WHERE HE EXPRESSES, HE LOVES HIS MOTHER. THE OLDER CHILD AND YOUNGEST DAUGHTER HAS MORE OF A DIFFICULT TIME AND HOLDS THINGS IN AND HAS MOMENTS OF BEING MAD AND SAD. MY BIGGEST FIGHT IS HELPINGTO MAKE CERTAIN THE CAN COPE IN THE ENVIROMENT THE WERE FORCED TO LIVE IN VERSUS THE ONE THEY WERE BORN IN. MOST OF THE ISSUES WERE PROMPTED BY THE GOVERNMENT AND THE CONCERN IS IT IS VERY CONTRADICTING. PARENTS SHOULD BE FREE TO RAISE THEIR OWN CHILDREN. IT WAS RECENTLY PROTESTED IN THE NEW JERSEY SENATE AND ASSEMBLY WHERE PROTESTORS PROMOTED THE VALUES AND IDEAS OF PARENTS PARENTING AND NOT THE GOVERNMENT CO-PARENTING. THE PROTEST SUPPORTED THE IDEA THAT CHILDREN NEED FATHERS. THE MOUNTAIN I AM BATTLING NOW IS JUST THAT. HOPEFULLY THAT MOUNTAIN CAN BE MOVED AND PROVIDE CIVIL AND CONSTITUTIONAL RIGHTS THE WAY IT WAS INTENDED BIT BY BIT ENSURING RIGHTS ARE AFFORDED TO EVERYONE NOT JUST THE WEALTHY AND NOT JUST MEN. THERE IS A BOOK WRITTEN BY STEPHANIE ROGER JONES ENTITLED “THEY WERE HER PROPERTY”. THE BOOK TALKS ABOUT THE ECOMONICS OF SELLING BLACK CHILDREN AND WOMEN INTO SLAVERY.
As always, we appreciate you sharing your insights and we’ve got a few more questions for you, but before we get to all of that can you take a minute to introduce yourself and give our readers some of your back background and context?
MY NAME IS MONA SPELLMAN BENJAMIN I AM A SINGLE BLACK MOTHER OF FIVE. I HAVE STARTED MY JOURNEY OF ADVOCACY AS A RESULT OF MY OWN PERSONAL STORY. I USE THE POWER OF THE PAPER AND PEN AS WELL AS OTHER CREATIVE MEDIUMS TO PROMOTE ADVOCACY FOR MOTHERS AND CHILDREN AS IT RELATES TO THE CAUSE OF CONSTITUTIONAL AND CIVIL RIGHTS AND FAIR TREATEMENT WITHIN THE COURT SYSTEM. SINCE BEING THERE HAS BEEN SUPPORTED LEGISLATION FOR TRAINING OF SOCAIL WORKERS AND WORKING WITH HOMELESS MOTHERS AND CHILDREN UNDER BILL A4756 WHICH CAME ABOUT AS A RESULT OF UNFAIR PRACTICES WITHIN THE EAST CAMDEN CHILD PROTECTIVE SERVICES. I AM MOST PROUD OF BEING A PARENT TO FIVE EXTRA ORDINARY CHILDREN THREE GROWN AND TWO MINORS AND A GRANDMOTHER OF TWO. I WAS VERY FORTUNATE TO BE JESUIT EDUCATED AND MY CAUSE IS NOW TO GIVE BACK IN A WAY THAT BENIFITS A CAUSE GREATER THAN MYSELF.
Can you share a story from your journey that illustrates your resilience?
RESILIENCE IS A VERY STRONG CHARATER TRAIT. I THINK GOING THROUGH THE PROCESS OF HAVING TO FIGHT FOR YOUR CHILDREN ONE OF THE MOST HEART RENCHING FIGHTS NEST TO FIGHT FOR YOUR HEALTH. IT KILLS APART OF YOU AND IT ALSO IGNITES A DESIRE TO FIGHT. THUS FAR I HAVE BEEN RESILIENT IN GOING THROUGH THE PROCESS AND PROVIDING INSIGHT ON THE HAPPENINGS WITHIN THE NEW JERSEY CHILD PROTECTIVE SYSTEM AND POSSIBLE SOLUTIONS TO MAKE IT BETTER FOR EVERYONE INVOLVED AND FOR FUTURE GENERATIONS TO HAVE THOSE RIGHTS AFFORDED AND NOT JUST PUSHED TO THE WAYSIDE. MY MOST RECENT PROJECT IS BUILDING A LEMONADE STAND TO PROVIDE AWARENESS AND EDUCATION FOR PARENTS AND TO SUPPORT THE CAUSE AS A PUBLIC INTEREST STORY.
Learning and unlearning are both critical parts of growth – can you share a story of a time when you had to unlearn a lesson?
THE LESSON I HAVE UNLEARNED IS TO NOT TRUST EVERYTHING EVERYONE TELLS YOU AND SOMETIMES YOU HAVE TO RESEARCH TOPICS YOURSELF AND PUSH FOR THE TRUTH. 
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STATE OF NEW JERSEY DIVISION OF CHILDREN AND FAMILY