We recently connected with Mish Winters and have shared our conversation below.

Mish, looking forward to hearing all of your stories today. Can you open up about a risk you’ve taken – what it was like taking that risk, why you took the risk and how it turned out?

I’ve always liked photography as a kid. I used to borrow my older sister’s camera that she got as a gift from her then boyfriend and I took a lot of random photos of objects, foods, my family and I was even the designated photographer in my group for a high school project to which the teacher saw and said “Who took these pictures? They have a very good eye…” But I never thought photography was anything more than just a hobby.

Throughout high school, I wouldn’t say I was the most popular kid, but definitely more than enough to easily get away with things and get special treatment from teachers. I excelled in arts, sports and music, I was told I could be anything I wanted to be. But what I truly wanted to become was a psychologist. I wanted to help people as I felt that I had a deep level of empathy and had the ability to make a difference. I loved reading psychology books, problem solving, and being a person that someone could trust and lean on. That all changed right up until I was admitted into a psych ward for schizophrenia.

I didn’t get to complete my final year of high school, I gained 40kgs within 10 months due to anti-psychotics, lost a lot confidence in myself and socialising with other people. self-harmed and I was getting admitted, discharged and re-admitted time and time again into hospitals (9 times to be exact in 2.5 years), and I had lost all motivation and drive to do anything with my life because I thought I was a complete write off and there was nothing left for me.

I spent a lot of time staying at home, going to doctors appointments and sitting, waiting and wishing of being a ‘normal’ person. I wanted to be the typical high school student who finished their exams, went to University and worked a 9-5 job. I even wasted my time re-studying Year 12 again, but didn’t complete it because I took a lovely trip back to my second home, the inpatient unit, And that was pretty much it, my life had turned upside down, inside out, and did a triple backflip with a black BMX bike with rad stickers on it. I had officially hit rock bottom.

Every Friday afternoon, I would go to a ‘play group’ at a mental health clinic to socialise with others, get involved in board games and have tea and cookies. I bumped into my occupational therapist and she suggested that I should take up a course just for fun. I was hesitant at first because I thought I would repeat the past and not complete it, but after some thought, I knew exactly what I wanted to learn. Something creative, something I could do with my hands, be surrounded by other interesting people.. Photog- Nope, that wasn’t it. It was Auslan (Australian Sign Language). I’m not entirely sure why I wanted to learn it so bad, maybe it was because I was watching a TV show at the time with Deaf characters and I thought knowing how to sign would be a cool skill. I knew I was risking the little money I had and the precious time I could’ve used to sit around and twiddle my thumbs wishing I was someone else, to potentially drop out of a course. But you know what they say? Risk it for the biscuit. What was the biscuit? Not sure. So I signed up anyway and believe it or not, I completed an introductory course, Certificate 2, 3, 4 and Diploma. I wanted to be an interpreter. But, before you start thinking I’m signing expert and can basically sign as fast as the interpreters at rap concerts, I can tell you with full confidence that I am not. I was still in and out of hospital at that time and working through my hallucinations and delusions. I didn’t attend all my classes and if anything, I would rock up to class late and even get caught dozing off because my morning medications made me drowsy. I really wanted to put 100% in. I loved learning Auslan. It was fun, interesting and just a beneficial skill to have overall. But maybe deep down, the reason I wasn’t fully committed was because it wasn’t for me. I had spent 3 years learning a skill that I eventually didn’t use at all.

During the last 2 weeks of my Auslan Diploma, I started thinking about photography (Woo hoo! We got there!). I missed it and started to do a lot of research on cameras but I didn’t want this new obsession to be another fail. But for some reason, I didn’t care if I didn’t make anything out of it. I just wanted to do something I liked and I think at that time and for my mental health, I just needed something to be passionate about.

I didn’t have a lot of money as I didn’t work but got a small allowance from my mum of $200 a fortnight. I don’t remember what I spent my money on around that time but all I know is that I had $550 to my name. Okay, this might sound stupid but I had two things in mind that I wanted to buy. One was a camera, and the second was accessories for my guinea pigs. This actually took me some serious thinking but eventually I thought “Sorry Cornelius and Perry, I gotta risk it for the biscuit”. What was the biscuit? Don’t know. So one day after class, I went to a camera store in the city and went straight to their second hand section. I didn’t really have a clue on what I was looking for. I just wanted a DSLR as that was what my sister had years ago. I talked to the sales rep and they suggested a Canon 60D which was priced at $350. I didn’t understand what the specs were but in layman’s terms, they described it as an ‘iPhone 7’. I said “Let’s do it” but I then realised that I had to purchase a lens for it too. The cheapest one I could get was a 18-55mm for $100. Alright, now we’re really pushing it. I was going to be left with $100 in my bank account because I spent all of my money on a camera that I impulsively wanted. Was I conflicted? Yes. Was this a smart purchase? Probably not. Did the sales rep try to reel me in by offering a free SD card and an extra year of warranty? You bet.
But I wanted it. So I bought it.

I’m still finding my way. I’m still learning and I’m still growing, but I am so far from where I used to be. My love for photography has grown so wide that there is no space for any doubt. I taught myself, I went to photography school, I have submitted and won awards, I have had my work hung up in exhibitions, meet and learn from my biggest inspiration and photography hero (John Russo), shoot awesome jobs with awesome people such as Emma Watkins, Dyson Heppell and numerous beautiful models and influencers from top agencies in Australia. Oh, and I also did a 360 turn around and now shoot all the events for Expression Australia, the organisation who taught me my first Auslan signs.

I spend my days going to the gym burning off the medication weight, working on my business and craft, being around the people I love and practise being happy and grateful for my long, painful, BMX award winning journey. I recently celebrated my 5th consecutive year of being out of hospital and I live. We can’t predict our future, our successes or our losess. And sometimes we don’t know why things turn out the way they do. It just does. But just keep going. Wherever you are in life, just be happy. This too shall pass.

If there’s something you want to achieve, go for it. You either risk it and win or risk it and lose. But you try again. I did that and now I have all the biscuits.

Mish, love having you share your insights with us. Before we ask you more questions, maybe you can take a moment to introduce yourself to our readers who might have missed our earlier conversations?

My name is Mish Winters and I am a 26 year old photographer/videographer from Melbourne, Australia.

Through my final year of high school, I developed schizophrenia and had my dreams and goals shattered as I started to dip in and out of the psych ward. I had no direction or motivation in life but things started to change when I began my photography journey.

I took a leap of faith into learning the art of photography and building my brand. I love to shoot in the studio and my ultimate dream goal is to shoot fashion, campaigns, commercial and celebrities. I have worked in different genres of photography such as events and corporate and was even a professional boxing photographer.

I am proud of how far I’ve come with my brand. Even though I don’t have a big audience. I have grown so much and I have learnt so much about the photography world and the business that’s involved.

I wish to inspire those who have a dream but are too afraid to chase it. To those who want to do something but don’t feel that they’re ready. When will you be? The first best time to start something was 50 years ago. The second best time is today.

For you, what’s the most rewarding aspect of being a creative?

All I really wanted was to be a normal kid who went to high school, went to uni, make lots of friends and work a 9-5 job. But I realise now that that would have never worked out for me. I absolutely love being free, having the ability to make my own choices and work my own hours. I love meeting creative people in the industry and learning so much about the art of photography. It is so satisfying when I think of a cool idea or a new look that I could try out when I test shoot, and when it comes out even better than I imagined, it’s the best feeling in the world.

I often feel lost in life. I’m not sure if that’s a symptom of being a schizophrenic. Sometimes, I feel like I don’t know where I am, what I’m doing, or even who I am. But I always feel better when I focus on my photography and work. I think the most rewarding aspect of being an artist is that it makes me feel grounded and at last, I feel that in life, I am right where I’m supposed to be.

Is there something you think non-creatives will struggle to understand about your journey as a creative? Maybe you can provide some insight – you never know who might benefit from the enlightenment.

Something that I think non-creatives will struggle to understand about us creatives is the amount of effort and hard work we put into our jobs. I’ve come past many people who don’t understand my prices.. It’s a lot of work!

Back when I first started my business, I had zero confidence. So every time someone asked me for my price, I’d give it to them, and they’d tell me it was too much (even though it was literally so cheap). It led me to think I wasn’t worth what I was offering, so I’d push the price so low or even give it away for free. I’ve learnt that that was a huge mistake, not only for myself, but for the photography community. Us photographer, are our own worst enemy. A lot of the time, we don’t think we’re good enough and we often let our clients define out worth. But it’s time to let everyone know that we are professional photographers and we don’t just press a button. There is so much involved in being a photographer such as our time, our equipment, our retouching skills, knowledge and expertise etc. Just because we are freelancers, doesn’t mean we work for free.

Like any creative work, photography is a skill that takes years to learn and a lifetime to master.

Contact Info:

• Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/mishwinters/
• Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/mishwinters
• Other: https://mishwinterscreative.pic-time.com/portfolio