We recently connected with Michelle Murchison and have shared our conversation below.

Alright, Michelle thanks for taking the time to share your stories and insights with us today. Let’s start with the story of your mission. What should we know?

My mission is to tell stories that illuminate experiences that all people have, but most people don’t talk about. I am telling the stories of people of all ages with scars. The hope is that this creates inspiration and validation for those who are suffering and creates more empathy in everyone else and, by default, starves out isolation, creating connection and belonging.

I was diagnosed with Juvenile Rheumatoid Arthritis as 18 months old, and it rapidly destroyed most of my joints. I grew up very fast and have lived life with constant, severe pain. The older I get, and the more stories I tell of my life, the more I see the visceral reaction from people who cannot believe what I’ve been through, and the emotions it brings up for them. One story I often tell in recent years if of a babysitter I had one night as a child around the age of five. When I was young, I had three scars on each knee from arthroscopic surgeries, and I was already very self-conscious of them so I would refuse to wear shorts and only wore long pants, even in the heat of the North Carolina summer. This babysitter was changing my clothes one night when she saw my scars and said “I didn’t know you had stars on your knees!” This one simple, empathetic remark changed my confidence as a child – I suddenly wanted to wear shorts of skirts everyday and show off my “stars.” I’ve also found it incredibly therapeutic to tell my story, whether it be to my husband, friends, therapist, or in the media, as it’s an instant way to break the hoax of isolation, which comes with chronic pain (and any type of suffering, for that matter). I am building my company/brand to tell the stories that people shy away from, because these stories ARE the “norm.” No one gets out of here unscathed, and these stories are the most interesting and inspiring parts of life.

Michelle, before we move on to more of these sorts of questions, can you take some time to bring our readers up to speed on you and what you do?

I am a writer and I am currently self-publishing my first children’s book which will be completed this year. This book is based on the babysitter story I told in the last question, and it’s a children’s picture book designed to include, inspire, and validate kids with scars. I plan to launch this book in traditional ways, but I also have the goal of getting it into the hands of every child who has a scar so I have a lot of work to do!

In addition, I am currently writing a series on Instagram highlighting the stories of adults with scars who are willing to share their stories. I have a few ideas for how to take this series to a much larger audience in the future through publishing a book and an art exhibit, but there’s plenty of time for that.

What sets me apart in this work is my lived experience. I don’t know what it’s like to not be in pain, and arthritis feels like being trapped in the wrong body. I have lived the story of having chronic illness at every stage of my life. I have five total joint replacements, the first was my left knee at age 16 and the most recent is my left ankle which I receive three weeks ago! It is an entirely different human experience to live in constant pain, especially when you’ve never known any different, and it’s important to share those experiences so that others can feel less alone and understand how to make the world more inclusive.

Learning and unlearning are both critical parts of growth – can you share a story of a time when you had to unlearn a lesson?

As a child who always felt “different” from everyone else, I now realize that I spent the majority of my life and energy trying to prove myself and make myself valuable in every possible way so that no one could deny me. I have worked really hard to set myself apart as exceptional, a warrior, someone who has a struggle but overcomes it everyday without complaint, so that people would find me inspiring and WANT to be my friend. Because of the fear of being labeled as “different,” I developed perfectionism, I never asked for help, I did anything not to draw negative attention, I learned how to over-work so that people would be amazed at my leadership and flawless execution, and ultimately sacrificed my own mental, emotional, and physical health for the sake of others (unhealthy people pleasing).

I have had to work hard to unlearn these habits, and to just be myself. What’s been the most striking to me is that I realized that the first step was actually to figure out who I REALLY am without other people’s expectations or perceptions as the first filter. It’s a journey, and it’s been so freeing to become more of who I am each day.

We’d love to hear a story of resilience from your journey.

When I was a junior in high school, I was elected Student Body President for the following year. The summer between my junior and senior years, I had my first joint replacement surgery – my left knee. When the surgeon came out from surgery to talk with my parents, he said that when he went in for surgery my left tibia was broken clear across the front but that it had healed itself well enough that he could still do the replacement (thank goodness). He said I had probably been walking on a broken leg for 7 or 8 weeks without knowing. That’s how bad my knee was – I had no clue my leg was also broken.

Three weeks after my surgery, I was on crutches at my school shelving new library books and painting banners for the hallways with my entire Student Council, leading the charge.

Contact Info:

• Website: http://www.starsonmyknees.com/
• Instagram: @iamrobogirl
• Facebook: www.facebook.com/michellemurchisonwrites
• Other: Email – [email protected]

Image Credits
@katieburnsphotography took my author picture – with the colorful skirt with my scars showing