We caught up with the brilliant and insightful Mary L Flett a few weeks ago and have shared our conversation below.

Mary L, appreciate you joining us today. We’re complete cheeseballs and so we love asking folks to share the most heartwarming moment from their career – do you have a touching moment you can share with us?

I was working at a skilled nursing facility as a consulting psychologist. Many of the residents were folks with varying degrees of cognitive decline. Often I was asked to help with behavioral issues that came up. There was one woman, in her 80’s, who had been a Japanese War Bride. She would wander up and down the halls, endlessly, which was not unusual for someone with the later stages of Alzheimer’s, but was distressing to the staff. Staff were concerned that she might fall. What you may or may not know about the later stages of ALZ, is that people who grew up with a different language often revert to that language, actually forgetting how to speak their second (acquired) languge. So, I was asked to help “calm her down” and, after assessing her, I had the thought that maybe she was not wandering so much as looking for someone. I was able to make connection with Japanese service providers through the Alzheimer’s Association and was able to obtain some cassette (yes! old technology, I know) tapes that had Japanese children’s songs from the 1930s. We tried this out, and lo and behold, my patient smiled, then cried, and more importantly, stopped her incessant wandering and relaxed.

As always, we appreciate you sharing your insights and we’ve got a few more questions for you, but before we get to all of that can you take a minute to introduce yourself and give our readers some of your back background and context?

At my core, I am both a teacher and a healer. These two threads have woven their way through several of my careers, including teaching swimming and becoming an instructor trainer for the American Red Cross, working as an estate planning paralegal and learning about wills and trusts, becoming a licensed psychologist working with aging adults, and now as a coach, working with folks who are wanting to age better and age well.

Folks tell me that what they like best about me is that I am no-nonsense, as well as being compassionate. I find that the most liberating experience is just admitting whatever it is that you feel ashamed of and finding you are not alone in that fear. I apply this in my work as a coach and work together to identify priorities and remind you of the strengths you already bring to the table.

I also love writing and performing. My writing offers me the opportunity to both educate and entertain. I have a unique ability to draw from multiple resources, come up with a winning metaphor, and leave you either completely confused or clear about how best to move forward in your life. My performing consists mostly of monthly presentations where I get to use my background in Improv to share insights about aging with folks at Vintage House, my local Senior Center.

Above all, I am optimistic. I will find a way to make sure you laugh along with me at the absurdities that life seems to offer up and then come up with a strategy to get you to tomorrow.

Let’s talk about resilience next – do you have a story you can share with us?

My husband died and left me in debt. I had to manage my private practice, a part-time teaching schedule, all the while dealing with my anger and grief. I remember driving home after a late-night class, and being held up by roadwork. All I wanted to do was get into my house, shut the world off and dry. Instead, I was stuck on the side of the road, unable to move forward, while having to wait for others to decide when I could move forward.

I remember sitting in my driver’s seat, screaming with frustration at my inability to change things. And, in that moment of complete duress, breaking out laughing at the absurdity of it all

Truly, this was transformational and, once allowed to continue my journey that night, I realized that I would be able to move forward, forgive my husband and myself, and begin to live my life anew.

Do you think you’d choose a different profession or specialty if you were starting now?

I feel blessed that I have had more than one career. In going back, I find that each of the professions I have worked in has provided essential skills and honed my talents for the next. Acquiring a new skill should never be limited to just one application.

What I learned in teaching I was able to apply in a different way to my one-on-one work with patients. What I learned in being a para-legal, I have been able to use in encouraging people to complete end-of-life paperwork and helping them to find the right attorney. What I learned in performing has helped me overcome my shyness so that I can be open to offering my services to diverse groups.

Contact Info:

• Website: drmaryflett.com
• Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=61556484543299
• Linkedin: www.linkedin.com/in/drmaryflettgero5p

Image Credits
Mary L. Flett