After battling my own depression, self-doubt, and anxiety in 2021, I turned to a wall in my dining room and started painting. I needed answers,” Why was I crying if everything seemed fine?” I painted a mural of myself during three phases of my life. Sitting back and reflecting on each version of myself helped me realize I had not healed from several major life changes. I had bulldozed through each event without taking a moment to cry, yell, or just breath through the changes. It was there that I decided to use art for mental health healing. In 2023, I launched my company Moonchild LLC as the first step towards creating a safe space for artistic expression that leads to open discussion, self-discovery, and healing from the weight of mental health.

Moonchild LLC is dedicated to community work and building relationships that will help grow the movement for mental health awareness.

My first binge painting started during my early 20’s. At the time I didn’t realize art was my coping mechanism. I was in school for an associate degree in Hotel and Restaurant Management. I had my first “grown up” job working as a data entry tech at the school. I had broken dreams of marriage and having my happily ever after with my long-term boyfriend after a dramatic breakup during my pregnancy. Afterwards I was navigating postpartum depression with no one to talk to about that and was dealing with a lot of self-inflicted expectations.

Fast forward twenty years, another failed marriage (in my eyes even though the first relationship was never a marriage) and a major shift in my life, I hit my mental break wall full force. 2020 was not just the year of Covid, it was full of major losses, bad company, bad decisions, and deep depression that I could not suppress anymore.

I spent three months in the house not socializing at all, I couldn’t move past the sadness, self-shame, and guilt. I knew I was not ok because bouncing back had always been my strength. But, I just didn’t have the fire, the drive to pull myself up. WHY, was it different now? I sought a therapist and counseling. I had a diagnosis and medication but that was not enough.

Then I met someone that was going through her own personal trauma. I turned to partying and drinking to numb everything that I was feeling. Eight months of that before the fake “friendship” ended along with the reckless behavior.

I had finally moved into the final stage of grief-acceptance. No more running, I physically couldn’t avoid it. I had to SIT with all my feelings, go through them, analyze them and let them go. This is when I went back to painting, and when I finally realized painting was my outlet.

Moonchild LLC offers paintings that reflect real moments of pain, defeat, loss, shame, rage, abandonment, and resurrection because there behind all those negatives there is always new beginnings. ACCEPTING it and then letting it GO! I want to give the black and Hispanic communities an opportunity to self-discover themselves through art expression and find healing. This is not to replace therapy but an alternative to assist in unpacking that heavy load.

My turn around time I believe sets me apart from other artists in the area. I have achieved the things I have with persistence and perseverance despite my own limitations – mental, financial, and physical. When I reflect on my timeline, I really am an emerging artist in the Triangle area with one year of exhibition under my belt – I have come a long way.

I am most proud of moving past my comfort zone and getting started. As a self-taught artist I struggled with imposter syndrome. Stepping out into the art scene seemed extremely frightening, like I wasn’t good enough to hang my work next to artists that held degrees and years of experience. However, the purpose of my work was not solely to make money or become the next big name. I wanted to start talking about depression and healing through my art. So, I put those fears aside for the sake of the cause.

The most important thing for my brand is to connect with the audience in a meaningful way. To provide profound work that helps others go deeper into their thoughts and generate a nostalgia for healing.

Wow, asking for help! As a New Yorker, I grew up with the mentality that I had to do everything by myself, or it wouldn’t get done. You want something go get it. For the most part that is still somewhat true, but North Carolina has taught me that the best way to get things done is with community. Yes, taking the initiative and having drive is imperative, however connecting with people that support the idea, asking for help will get the mission further along. Also, being that supportive staff for someone else’s project, idea, or vision will take you further. Do not be the person with your hand out but also offer a hand.

I have had a few pivots in my career and in life. Initially I was bent on being in the culinary industry. It was my first passion and love. Just before moving to NC, I was working in a country club in Rye, NY. It was the most exhausting but fulfilling job I’ve ever had. I worked with amazing chefs that had dedicated their lives to the industry, I worked side-by-side with students coming out of the culinary institute and alongside cooks that were not formally trained but were life trained to be among the “educated” cooks. Three categories of professionals all providing knowledge that I still carry to this day.

My first pivot – upon moving to NC, I decided to leave the food industry due to the long hours, working weekends, nights, and holidays. I wanted to be available for my then husband and my kids. I instead started my MA in Health Administration and found employment in medical collection. The problem with being an adrenaline junky (as I see myself) having down time seems a waste of time. So, in addition to pursuing grad school, I also took on learning about legal collections which was another branch of my existing role and volunteering outside of work. My reasoning for all this was to make myself more appealing to the work force and build my resume. What I failed to see in hindsight was how that was affecting my family.

My second pivot came after my family fell apart. It was a hard pill to swallow. I recognized my shortcomings but now I had something to prove. I had to make it without my husband. I did not want to ask for help. I would work 2-3 jobs to make it. Then I put my trust in the wrong person.

Pivot # 3 was hitting rock bottom – realizing I had emotional baggage that I could no longer hide or run from. The “make it without help” was not working anymore. Truth was it never worked, at least not in NC. That was a reality in NYC but here I needed help.

Each pivot taught me something about myself, my personal drive, and my motivation. The last has made me realize that taking care of my mental, physical, and emotional well-being is equally as important as status. Finally, the healing processes is long, just when you feel “I’m good”, you may find there is still work to do, there is still something lingering that needs to be unpacked.