We were lucky to catch up with Mandi Roarke recently and have shared our conversation below.

Hi Mandi, thanks for joining us today. Can you recount a time when the advice you provided to a client was really spot on? (Please note this response is for education/entertainment purposes only and shouldn’t be construed as advice for the reader)

Oftentimes, clients arrive at our sessions with the hopes I am the expert that can solve their problems by answering questions that give them the most uncertainty. It’s almost as if the hope is that I’ll have a magical crystal ball that can answer all of those questions to will help alleviate the fears and anxieties about the great unknown that lies ahead of them in their lives. The first part of our work together is to acknowledge and reinforce how the client is the expert in their life, not me. And I am here to help them lean into their expertise and inherent strengths. It is a process for many clients to learn to trust to lean into their expertise and it makes it even harder to do when they can’t predict or control the future. So, I share one of my favorite quotes with clients as we work together to help, “The only certainty we have is uncertainty.” In some weird way, this quote offers a sense of relief in that we can get good (and maybe even comfortable) at not knowing. This concept of being certain that we will be uncertain can help people feel empowered in that we aren’t supposed to know what we don’t know. We just need to know that it’s ok and human to not know, that’s for sure.

Mandi, before we move on to more of these sorts of questions, can you take some time to bring our readers up to speed on you and what you do?

My name is Mandi, I am a couple and family therapist who also supports individuals in Austin, TX. I view my work in therapy as a partnership where my clients and I are both equals collaborating to work toward the change they are seeking in their lives. Whether I support clients in one on one therapy sessions or by sharing other mental health resources my job is to help you help yourself.

I treat the therapeutic relationship with respect and have an intentional focus on creating a safe and trusting space for my clients to explore themselves and their relationships. I arrive at my sessions as a curious learner of my clients’ inner worlds. I honor the vulnerability involved in the therapeutic process and hold this space with my clients with care. I am socially and culturally conscious, body-affirming, LGBTQ+ allied, and sex-positive. “Y’all” means all, y’all.

After being a therapist for 10 years, I have come to recognize that while therapy is one way to help support the many experiences life brings us, it is not the only way. Over the past couple of years, I have co-founded a mental health online ecosystem named, Zessio. I am excited to help you continue to help yourself by increasing access to additional mental health resources. I believe I am a visitor in your life that is here to help you lean into the strengths that are inherently in you. So it is important as a therapist that I also encourage you to develop an individualized way for you to manage your mental health in the space between therapy and everyday life.

We often hear about learning lessons – but just as important is unlearning lessons. Have you ever had to unlearn a lesson?

The lesson I learned growing up in my hometown’s school environment was “pretty good is not good enough.” I remember the Superintendent reading this poem off with the most serious tone and I walked away from that presentation thinking “If pretty good isn’t good enough, is anything good enough?” As small of a moment as it may seem, this was a person of authority as I am an adolescent making meaning of this world that sent a message full of shame and rigid unfair expectations. I thought about this moment the other day and how it set the scene to strive for perfection. After all, if pretty good isn’t good enough, then it needs to be better than good. It needs to be PERFECT to be good enough. Over 20 years later I am grateful to say that I have unlearned that unfair message from that Superintendent. As I have become an adult, a professional, and a business owner, I have realized that pretty good IS good enough. And, that I am good enough as long as I do my best.

Other than training/knowledge, what do you think is most helpful for succeeding in your field?

I think an essential ingredient for success in the mental health field is to have a growth mindset. To me, a growth mindset means that, while you have a foundation of knowledge and experience you’ve learned along the way, you strive to grow from this foundation to learn and evolve as an individual. If you are fixed in your mindset your growth is stagnant, and growth is necessary for success. Everything is always changing, moment by moment, and the growth mindset helps you keep an open mind for where you may need to stretch, learn, and further enhance what you already know.

Contact Info:

• Website: www.mandiroarke.com
• Instagram: @mandiroarkecounseling
• Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/MandiRoarkeAustin
• Linkedin: https://www.linkedin.com/in/mandi-roarke-m-a-3635994
• Youtube: https://www.youtube.com/@myzessio
• Other: www.Zessio.com @myzessio https://www.facebook.com/myzessio

Image Credits
@authenticexposurestudio