We were lucky to catch up with Lucille Messina recently and have shared our conversation below.

Lucille, looking forward to hearing all of your stories today. Let’s start with the story of your mission. What should we know?

The story behind my mission:
What if your child could never say “momma” or “daddy”? It is a road many parents are forced to undertake in their lifetime. I was one of those parents and it is why I authored “Waiting to Hear “Momma”: A Mother’s Memoir.”

After college, I worked for a transportation company, during that period I gave birth and cared for Jacklyn, my medically fragile child. By writing the raw and gut-wrenching struggles I encountered I hoped to help other parents, relatives or caregivers realize they are not alone. They too can survive their adversity. I have said that if I can save one troubled person from jumping in front of a train then who knows what that one person can achieve in their lifetime.

I have been associated with United Cerebral Palsy for over 30 years and was president of a fundraising auxiliary. A few years after my Barnes & Noble book signing and speaking engagements we moved to Lakewood Ranch, Florida from Garden City, New York. Now in Florida, my path and mission in life has continued. I founded the “Making a Difference” club in Del Webb Lakewood Ranch that is dedicated to fundraising and volunteering for special needs children and/or organizations supporting people with disabilities.

Our logo is a starfish. There is a story behind it.
One Person Can Make a Difference – A man on the beach where thousands of starfish lay dying in the sun saw a girl tossing them into the sea, one by one, “Why bother?” he asked. “You won’t make such a difference.” Tossing yet another starfish into the sea, the girl said, “I made a difference to that one.”

To date my Making a Difference club has made an impact through our fundraising events for Suncoast Charities for Children and Wheelchairs 4 Kids to name a few. I am working on installing a second ADA compliant swing seat in a local park because every child regardless of his or her ability should enjoy this simple childhood experience. Unfortunately, the day we had one installed in our local park for our daughter, that was the day she entered into the hospital for the last time. Jacklyn never got to use that swing.

My twenty plus years of volunteering have proven to be the most rewarding and I am honored to be of service to those in need.

Awesome – so before we get into the rest of our questions, can you briefly introduce yourself to our readers.

It all began after my husband spoke to our baby’s pediatric neurologist. After the office visit with the doctor my husband said to me “just pray she is only blind!” At that moment I realized nothing would be as I planned. My journey started as the mother of a special child.

I am proud of having the determination to share my story to help others. If you are a counselor, therapist, psychologist, or anyone dealing with special needs families, my book and experiences will have you walk in the shoes of those you are treating.
I have been informed by readers observation that my message goes beyond my initial intention. It is a story of survival.

Adversity hits every one of us differently.
• Cancer, loss of a spouse, loss of a child, dementia of a loved one, chronic illnesses, spouse or child disability, caretaker burden, addiction, financial hardship, family issues, loneliness – we all strive at some point in our lives to climb out of a hole and see the sunrise every day.
I did it and so can you.

An unexpected benefit of being an advocate and recently forming the Making a Difference fundraising club can be summed up with a recent text message that I received after an event. A volunteer said, “I love what you’ve done here and, btw, it has “made a difference” in my life here too!

I am pleased that I can be a companion via my written accounts to all those parents dealing with having a special child. Hopefully my true story of faith, unconditional love, fear, anger, depression, guilt, loneliness, and discrimination inspire families to never give up.

Can you share a story from your journey that illustrates your resilience?

Mental pain is much worse than physical pain. There is no comparison. It took one year of therapy sessions for me to allow myself to go out to dinner with my husband and leave Jacklyn with a sitter. She reached a one-month mental level and was not progressing further. Her seizures were uncontrollable.

It was a foggy night, and instead of walking to the car after having dinner with my husband, I started to walk to the railroad crossing gate that had just come down. The warning bells rang while lights flashed. I could see off in the distance the dim light of a train approaching. I stood next to the tracks as the train came closer. The fog was getting thicker, and a soft mist was in the air, gently hitting my face. It felt like a veil made of tiny teardrops. I thought that so many people end their mental pain this way. It would be quick. I would be free. I am not afraid to die, but afraid to live. The train was a quarter mile away as I swayed back and forth. My eyes filled with tears. Karl’s comment days ago— “Step up to the plate or pack it in; step up to the plate or pack it in”—bounced around in my head.

A blurry image of Jacklyn sitting alone flashed before me. Sitting alone!! Alone and unprotected!! With that vision, I slowly turned and walked toward our car. I could feel the wind from the passing train whirling at my back. My long black coat flapped outstretched from the enormous gust that surrounded me.

Picturing Jacklyn without a mother to defend and take care of her was not an option. She could not walk, talk or see.

As I sat in the car, I knew Karl needed and deserved as much help as I could provide, no matter what I could manage at any given time. This precious child had made us a team. In a way that night, Jacklyn saved me!

Any stories or insights that might help us understand how you’ve built such a strong reputation?

My reputation was built because I became strong at MY broken place.

“The world breaks everyone, and afterward, some are strong at the broken places.” Ernest Hemingway

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