We were lucky to catch up with Kimberly A Cook recently and have shared our conversation below.

Alright, Kimberly A thanks for taking the time to share your stories and insights with us today. Can you open up about a risk you’ve taken – what it was like taking that risk, why you took the risk and how it turned out?

I have never identified myself as a risk-taker. Frankly, based on my fear of heights, scary movies, and self-identifying as “type A,” I am most comfortable knowing “what comes next” or, at least, having a good handle on the anticipated outcome. Yet, as George Michael proudly proclaimed, “I gotta have faith,” and that is what drove me to start a podcast with the mission to educate and empower Black women through divorce. I believed then, as I do now, that while the legal process is arguably the same for everyone regardless of race, gender, sexual orientation, or resources, that the divorce experience is significantly impacted by your race, gender, sexual orientation, and resources.

The risk was not starting a podcast because podcasts are not “inherently” risky. The risk was being selective about the intended audience and being unequivocal about the audience and mission in the face of significant push-back, impact to my professional business development, and reputation. The risk was putting the needs of people who I had never met, and will never likely meet, above my own because of the belief that educating and empowering through her divorce process would not just change her life but the lives of generations of her family members.

I started Grown Girl Divorce podcast in 2020. I had no experience with podcasts and no audience. Yet, I bought a microphone, headphones, and signed up for a Free Zoom subscription with the belief that if I recorded it – someone would hear it. Was I naive? Yes. Was recording a lot harder than I anticipated? Yes. Did I struggle to find guests? Yes. Have I made mistakes and questioned my own commitment to the podcast? Yes. Does it matter to me that it may not be the most popular podcast on streaming services? No. Was it the right thing to stick to being focused and intentional on my desired audience? Absolutely.

The Grown Girl Divorce podcast has allows me to reach Black women around the world in a way that I never knew was possible. It allows me to create a space of relatability for Black women before, during, or after their divorce. Society’s “divorce narrative” is not written with Black women in mind. The divorce process often finds Black women stereotyped, stigmatized, shunned, or silenced. But, the Grown Girl Divorce podcast highlights and amplifies issues and voices of Black women in a way that has not been done before but which is much needed.

My ability to represent non-Black and/or non-female clients or serve as a neutral Mediator has been questioned and challenged since starting the podcast. I have been told that “the divorce process is the same for all people and there is no need to focus on Black women,” and that other divorce podcast hosts “also support Black women because they support all women.” Yet, the push-back, challenges, and misconceptions, propels me to push forward to keep building a stronger podcast and broader audience. It is risky but it is worth it!

Kimberly A, love having you share your insights with us. Before we ask you more questions, maybe you can take a moment to introduce yourself to our readers who might have missed our earlier conversations?

I am the founder of Grown Girl Divorce, LLC, a divorce resource company, which educates and empowers Black women through divorce. You can listen to me weekly as she educates and empowers listeners as the host of The Grown Girl Divorce podcast which is available on all streaming services. I am also the CEO of Dovetail Conflict Resolution, a divorce and family mediation firm located in Chicago, Illinois. Prior to my current roles, I maintained a distinguished legal career as a litigator at one of the country’s premier divorce firms where she represented high profile clients. In addition to my work, I share my legal education and experience with the community as an Adjunct Law and Writing professor, speaker, and mentor. I have been listed in Super Lawyers and Best Lawyers in America as well as featured in various publications including Crain’s Chicago, Black Enterprise, Thrive Global, and Business Insider.

I always knew I wanted to be in a position to help people. My parents are educators, community leaders, and social servants, who instilled the values of hard work, compassion, and service in me from a young age. While I have not personally experienced divorce (i.e., my parents have been happily married for 48 years, I have been happily married for 16 years), I strongly believe that everyone deserves to know and experience healthy and happy relationships. Unfortunately, that is not a reality for everyone, but I have the unique opportunity to work with people who are not in healthy and happy relationships navigate out of these relationships and move forward to living the life they deserve. I am committed to educating and empowering individuals as they face the ups and downs of the divorce process for themselves and their families.

I am guided by compassion, composure, and clarity. As a socially conscious leader and advocate for families, I believe educating and empowering individuals with information, resources, and skills to better themselves and their families are the foundation from which companies, communities, and societies are sustained. When faced with challenging situations, delicate subjects, and diverse personalities, my approach is characterized as grace under pressure, discrete, problem solving, and effective. I have a proven track record of being a trustworthy advocate for clients and organizations and adeptly managing people through complex decisions with generational impact. Most issues begin with a lack of clarity – it breeds misunderstandings, confusion, and division. It is critically important for me to clearly communicate with my clients and listeners because they deserve to understand the challenges which lay ahead while also knowing they will be okay.

I am most proud of being able to help people realize they are worthy of healthy and happy relationships. Make no mistake – I am not pro-divorce (i.e., I am not pushing or suggesting divorce on anyone) but rather it is an honor to be there to guide someone through a difficult time knowing they can, and will, get through it.

Grown Girl Divorce is a divorce resource company. My vision is for GGD to be a comprehensive resource company which provides resources via the podcast, professional resources (e.g., worksheets, programs, directory), services (e.g., coaching, support groups), and events. It has been a challenge but I believe that nothing which comes easy is worth doing. I want people to know that Grown Girl Divorce was born from a desire to amplify, uplift, and support Black women through divorce so that they are seen and heard through their divorce experience.

Any stories or insights that might help us understand how you’ve built such a strong reputation?

I think my education and experience as a divorce professional has helped grow Grown Girl Divorce. There is a credibility that comes from having extensive experience as a divorce attorney, as well as navigating the legal system as a Black woman, which is something listeners appreciate and value. Grown Girl Divorce started with only family and friends listening to the podcast and has grown to listeners from around the world. The podcast has now expanded into a divorce resource company with the vision to continue to grow and develop. Yet, none of that would have been possible without my professional background as a trustworthy and compassionate divorce attorney and mediator. I pride myself on maintaining that reputation in legal practice because that only adds credibility to the work that Grown Girl Divorce is also doing in educating and empowering Black women through divorce.

Learning and unlearning are both critical parts of growth – can you share a story of a time when you had to unlearn a lesson?

I had to learn that I truly cannot do it all. I have always been fiercely independent but growing Grown Girl Divorce showed me that I cannot (and should not) do it all. I have learned to ask for help and to be honest about my capacity to work and grow the business. I have also had to learn that everything does not have to be perfect or done right away. It’s okay to take your time so long as you are consistent.

Contact Info:

• Website: www.growngirldivorce.com
• Instagram: @Growngirldivorce
• Facebook: Grown Girl Divorce
• Linkedin: https://www.linkedin.com/company/grown-girl-divorce

Image Credits
Katherine Hannah Photography