Alright – so today we’ve got the honor of introducing you to Kimberley Homer. We think you’ll enjoy our conversation, we’ve shared it below.
Kimberley, appreciate you joining us today. We love heartwarming stories – do you have a heartwarming story from your career to share?
Many times, potential clients ask me what are my thoughts on their children being present during the birthing process. I preface my response with one of my favorite stories that happened to be one of the most memorable births during my schooling.
As I was halfway through Midwifery school, there was a point where I began teaching childbirth education at the birth center I precepted at. There was an expectant mom whose husband traveled in and out of the country for business, and the schedule in some instances was unpredictable. So, while she attended her childbirth preparation classes, her consistent support person ended up being her daughter. (We’ll call the daughter Emily.) Emily (a nine year old) was very attentive in the classes…asked questions…accompanied her mom to some of her prenatal appointments…and in some instances, held her mom accountable with the information she learned from the childbirth prep classes.
I admired Emily’s curiosity, but I still told myself, “she’s just a young girl looking out for her mom.” In actuality, it was more than that, and soon, I was about to find out! Emily’s mom went into labor while dad was in South America, so the two of them made their way to the birth center. Once her mom got settled in, a different Emily developed. Emily began recognizing the that her mom was in active labor, and immediately began coaching and affirming her mom. Hitting her mom with “I’m so proud of you”, “Remember to breath with control”, “You’re getting closer mom”, “Relax your shoulder like mines”…needless to say, I was in awe.
We now hit transition, where control of self gets a little rocky. Emily’s mom began to cry as she coped with contraction, so her daughter made sure she patted her moms tears with the most gentle touch and would say “This just means it’s almost time to meet my sister.” So present…so aware…the moment is full, then begins to over flow, because now it’s time to push. The midwife realized how present Emily was and gave her the shock of a lifetime and say “Would you like to help catch your sister?” The joy that welted up in Emily and her mom’s eye…oh em ge! At this point. i’m coaching myself not to cry. The Midwife guided Emily’s hands to catch her sister as she crowned, and when the head was out, in the birthing pool, supported by her big sisters loving hands, the room overflowed with love, and before you knew it, baby’s body was out, and Emily handed her sister to her mom. Once her mom had her sister secured in her arms, Emily broke down into tears. I’m hugging her while tears flowed down my face, as her whole body shook in my arms.
This moment taught me so many unspoken words about birth and having children present. So, anytime a client asks me about children being present, that’s the story that I share!
Kimberley, before we move on to more of these sorts of questions, can you take some time to bring our readers up to speed on you and what you do?
One of my favorite questions is when people ask, “How did you get into Midwifery?” My initial response is always the same. “Midwifery chose me before I even knew what it was.” Growing up, I had never really been around birth, pregnancy, nor newborns. Even when my nieces and nephews were born, I didn’t see them for a good while…up until maybe the 3 month mark. I’m not even sure where I ever heard the term “Midwife,” but somehow it resonated with me. Almost like imprinting.
As I was getting ready to graduate high school, I asked the nurses that I knew if they knew any midwives. I would get confused looks and/or responses like “They don’t have those anymore!” So, I took to the dial up internet streets. (Yes, I said dial up) At that time, I barely found information, BUT I did find two midwifery schools. One in Maine and the other in Idaho, and guess what…? This Haitian American Caribbean blooded woman from Miami was not about to go to either! LOL! So, I did the typical thing and went to college, got a job with benefits, and worked.
During my 10th year at this job, and getting ready to train to become a store manager for this Fortune 20 company, I realized this doesn’t make me happy or bring me joy, even though I did my job well. It was time to do something for me, and I created a (then called) bucket list. Number one was to become a Midwife. At this time, I found plenty of info on the internet streets, including a school in Miami! I applied, interviewed, and got accepted in! Orientation was the first time I ever met a midwife! I gave my job three months notice (after putting in for my vacation of course).
So here we are….the night before my last day working. Can we say “Terrified”? Because that’s exactly what I was the whole entire day as the closing Manager on Duty. Going over wild scenarios in my head…wondering what am I going to do without this “good”, “dependable” job and paycheck. How am I going to help out at the house, being that my mom passed and my dad is retired? Wondering if I still have the opportunity to keep my job, become an hourly associate, go part-time, and make this “good” job work. The day went by so fast, and now it’s 5 minutes before the store closes, and i’m in the Millworks department because we had a call out. There is a group of about 5 people browsing in the department, and I ask if anyone needs any assistance…they let me know they’re just looking. I remind them the store is getting ready to close so they would want to make it to the register soon if they do have any purchases. At this time i’m sweeping around the desk, resuming my inner, fear based dialog, and a guy from the group circles back and says “What are you doing here?” I figured he sees me in my manager outfit and is wondering why i’m sweeping, so I let him know we had a call out and i’m helping out in the department. He responds “No, what are you doing working here?” Now I have a confused look on my face, then he continues “You’re not suppose to be working here, and if you don’t follow the path that God has laid out for you, there will be a lot of blood on your hands…” and he tells me a few more private, yet confirming things. Bay-bee, when I got to my car, I was a ball of tears. After that confirmation and affirming, I didn’t even bother to show up the last day.
Midwifery was more than a choice…it was a calling that awaited my arrival!
We’d love to hear a story of resilience from your journey.
There has definitely been a defining moment while in school, that showed me my ability to adapt and overcome and sometimes we just need a reminder of who we are and who we are meant to be!
Halfway through school was the toughest time I encountered! Everyone I started the program with, dropped out. So, now i’m my own classmate, leaning on thine self! Then, my car breaks down, and I can’t afford to fix it because i’m paying for school out the pocket. So, i’m riding my bike to the metrorail…taking the metrorail to downtown…catching the bus to school. That was the easy part…waking up the extra hour and 35 minutes was hard. After class was even tougher…I had to catch the last bus (because class got out at 11pm and the last bus comes around that time). So, if the bus bike rack was full, i’d have to ride my bike 10 miles to downtown Miami, to catch the metrorail home. Try doing that while working at the birth center, being in class 5 hrs twice a week, on call for 36 hours, doing 12-24 overnights at the birth center, starting up your yoni steam business, while encapsulating placentas, and being a postpartum doula.
Needless to say, I wasn’t too sure about me and if I was doing this the right way, because I was struggling. Especially with no support. Life had gotten real, and in my last moment of doubting myself and my path…that reminder came as to why I was here in the first place. I ran into someone I grew up with in school and church, and had a conversation to catch up on each others lives. So when it was her turn, she asked “And what are you up to now a days?” I let her know I was halfway through Midwifery school. When those words landed, my friend became 2 shades pale and knees were going weak to the point I had to reach out to make sure she’s okay to still stand. My friend had a look of disbelief and said “Kim!!! We thought you were crazy!!!” At this point, i’m really lost, but she continued and said “I remember when we were 6/7 years old at church and you said, when you have a baby, we’re going to be in a forest by a river, holding our hands, surrounding you singing! And when you have your baby in that river, you’re going to catch babies for the rest of your life”
At this point, i’m the one in disbelief. That was all I needed to refill my fuel tank! I finished school and realized midwifery has done more than make me a midwife…it reintroduced me to myself…it showed me the type of person I was meant to be, and i’m truly grateful!
Do you think you’d choose a different profession or specialty if you were starting now?
If I could go back, I would absolutely, unequivocally choose the same profession.There are so many different ways that Midwifery saved my life! It made me want to be a better me mentally, emotionally, spiritually, and physically. I started to see my true self because of the craft. I use the word craft, because that’s what it is to me. Not so much of a profession, job, or career, but a time honored craft that i’m grateful to be a part of!
Contact Info:
- Website: https://www.crowningmidwifery.com
- Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/crowningmidwifery/
- Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/crowningmidwifery
- Twitter: https://www.twitter.com/crowningmidwife
- Youtube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC_60WROm_T0AZ1GI6zhSQBg
- Yelp: https://www.yelp.com/biz/crowning-midwifery-birth-services-and-beyond-tallahassee
- Other: Linktree https://linktr.ee/crowningmidwifery