We caught up with the brilliant and insightful Kelly Nembhard a few weeks ago and have shared our conversation below.

Kelly, appreciate you joining us today. It’s always helpful to hear about times when someone’s had to take a risk – how did they think through the decision, why did they take the risk, and what ended up happening. We’d love to hear about a risk you’ve taken.

I started graduate school in 2003, pursuing a Ph.D. in Cell and Developmental Biology. I was researching the genetics of birth defects that affected the heart. My project hit a roadblock of uninterpretable data about 4 years in, which eventually resulted in 8.5 years of trying to get my degree. Every time I thought I was making progress, it always resulted in a dead end. Whenever I would consider starting over with a new project, the results of an experiment would give me a glimmer of hope that completion was just around the corner. Whenever I would consider leaving graduate school with a Master’s degree, I’d tell myself that I had come too far. When I mentioned to anyone the possibility of leaving graduate school with a Master’s degree, I was either threatened with being labeled a failure, told my life would amount to nothing, or guilted into feeling as though I wasted other people’s time.

One day, I decided to think through why I was choosing to stay in graduate school. I already decided that I did not want to become a professor or run my own laboratory. I had no desire to be a post-doctoral researcher for the rest of my life. Quite frankly, I never wanted to see another lab coat or pipette ever again, if I could help it. I realized that I did not know what exactly I wanted my career to be, so long as I was using biology to help people. Everything I had no interest in pursuing required a Ph.D.; so, it seemed like there was no longer a point in trying to get one. “But what about what everyone will say or do if I quit? The stress of staying in graduate school led to tension headaches, muscle spasms, irritable bowel syndrome, rashes, puking at random times for no reason, and patches of hair falling out. My therapist at the time said those symptoms are typical of inmates in prison! PRISON! Why would anyone who cares even the slightest about me want me to sacrifice my health and well-being to get a degree that no longer mattered to me?

When I asked myself that question, I realized I was staying in the PhD program for other people, not for me. I had been focused on trying to make others happy and not on making myself happy. In fact, up until that point, I had lived a life of trying to meet everyone else’s expectations of me, thinking that it would make me happy. When I would meet their expectations, nothing changed; I had been in a constant state of seeking happiness all my life and never getting there. Reflecting on this, I decided enough is enough. I did not know what I wanted but was clear on what I did not want. I did not want to keep doing the things I knew were sucking the joy out of my life. So, it was time to stop doing them, and first on the chopping block was graduate school.

When I left graduate school with my Masters degree, I was called a quitter and a failure by people I cared for. I was told I would never get a job, because job seekers won’t hire quitters. Some even said a Master’s degree was worthless! Most colleagues and fellow graduate students stopped talking to me altogether; some didn’t even acknowledge me in public! Interestingly enough, I never missed those people. Not even for a second. That let me know I spent years concerning myself with people who never contributed to the quality of my life to begin with. There are loved ones who still to this day think I should have never quit the program. I recognized that their belief has nothing to do with me and is most likely about them trying to find their happiness through me; that is not my responsibility.

You know what else happened? The day I left graduate school felt like the best day I’d had since I started 8.5 years prior. I didn’t know what the future held for me; but I no longer felt like I was in prison. I got a job 6 weeks later in clinical research, which meant I could still use biology to help people. The best part of it all is I have no regrets whatsoever about leaving graduate school without my Ph.D. I walked away with so many valuable skills and wonderful lifelong friends, and I took the first of many steps toward living my authentic self. I did well.

Kelly, before we move on to more of these sorts of questions, can you take some time to bring our readers up to speed on you and what you do?

I worked with many hospitals and clinics as a clinical researcher. During that time, I learned that a person’s commitment to their health affects their quality of life. A busy schedule, a lack of knowledge, or a lack of faith in the healthcare system often interfered with commitment. After thinking on this issue and the challenges I faced with my health, I wanted to help others feel less alone in facing their challenges. As a health & wellness coach, I can do that. I support my client’s commitment to their health through motivation and accountability while honoring their values. I help them take full stock of their current whole health needs – their mental, emotional, spiritual, and physical health. We set goals together, and create an action plan for getting them on the road to better health.

Whether my client prefers conventional care, alternative therapies, or a combination of both, I use my knowledge and personal health experience to help them achieve a balanced whole health. As a scientist, I’ve always believed that the everything is energy, including the human body, thoughts, feelings, and emotions. I became interested in how energy is distributed throughout the body so that it can function. That led me to Reiki and crystal healing. My stress during graduate school made me curious about how the mind and body interact with each other to support our well-being. That led me to practicing mindfulness. My love of plants fed my desire to work with plants to improve my health. That led me to essential oils and aromatherapy.

Combining Reiki, crystal healing, coaching, and aromatherapy with conventional healthcare made the most positive impact on my health. These modalities improved more than my physical health concerns. They deepened my awareness of my mind-body connection. They helped me to recognize my well-being needs before issues began to affect my daily living. So, I am motivated to help make them available to others through My Wealth in Health. Its mission is to be a resource for people looking for healing that allows them to have a life that feels healthful and authentic to them.

Have you ever had to pivot?

I started My Wealth in Health in May 2019. By January 2020, I had been working with both coaching clients and Reiki clients every day, and I had taught my first Reiki class of 6 students. Everything was falling into place for my business to be a success. Then the COVID-19 pandemic happened.

Social distancing and the strain of the economy put my business in a chokehold. I went from having clients every day to an average of 2 clients a month for 6 months. On another note, many large companies and health insurance companies recognized that the pandemic created a sedentary society. A sedentary lifestyle is linked to higher rates of physical and mental illness, which means more employees calling out sick and higher health insurance claims. With that in mind, large companies began offering health & wellness coaching for free as part of their employee benefits. Health insurance companies were including coaching in their member plans. New coaches with private practices didn’t stand a chance of getting clients.

Nevertheless, I saw this unfortunate circumstance as a test by the Universe. The Universe was testing my resolve to have an integrative healthcare business. It was asking me if I was sure that this is part of my life purpose. I took stock of the state of my business and realized I did not have a high overhead for expenses. So, there was no need to consider closing the business at that stage. I took a full-time job as a health coach working for a joint health company. I also saw the downtime for my business during the pandemic as an opportunity to learn new skills for supporting my business. I maintained the My Wealth in Health website myself and wanted to improve its searchability on Google. So, I took online search engine optimization classes. I then became trained on how to teach Reiki classes online and received more Reiki training as well.

By the time people felt safe enough to return to Reiki and health coaching, I was more easily found on Google, was ready to offer online Reiki classes, and had more Reiki healing techniques at my disposal. So, Universe, the answer is “Yes, this is part of my life purpose.”

Do you think you’d choose a different profession or specialty if you were starting now?

Yes, I would choose the same profession. What I would change, if I could go back, is when I started my profession and in what order I worked on my specialties. But who is to say that my path would have been easier if I did?

When I started My Wealth in Health, my primary service was health & wellness coaching, with Reiki and aromatherapy being my secondary services. However, the needs of my clients shifted Reiki into being my primary service. I often wonder if it would have been better to start with Reiki as my primary service. Maybe not. Going through health & wellness coach training helped me to become a better listener. It also made me more aware of the different internal dialogues and levels of understanding people may have about health & well-being. I incorporate the skills I learned from health & wellness coach training into my Reiki sessions and classes. Doing so adds tremendous benefit to the quality of my interactions with my Reiki clients.

As for starting my profession sooner, it would have created missed opportunities. If I had left graduate school earlier, I would have missed out on meeting some of the friends I have today. I also would not have experienced those physical stress symptoms that prompted my interest in the mind-body connection. If I did not explore the mind-body connection, I would not have learned mindfulness. Mindfulness would not have become part of my self-care and business offerings.

The bottom line is that changing when I started my profession or the order in which I focused on my specialties could have yielded different results, even better ones. But the path I took still turned out well. Even though I would have avoided points of upset in my past, it does not guarantee that there wouldn’t be others lying in wait on a different path. Everything happened for a reason, and so it is.

Contact Info:

• Website: https://www.mywealthinhealth.com/
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