We’re excited to introduce you to the always interesting and insightful Kelly Miller. We hope you’ll enjoy our conversation with Kelly below.

Hi Kelly, thanks for joining us today. Do you think your parents have had a meaningful impact on you and your journey?

My parents taught me a great deal about work ethic and never giving up. My dad worked hard… I remember going to his office on the weekends with him so he could get more of his to-do list done and how he was not impressed when I blew up the office microwave attempting to heat up a Capri Sun, haha!

When I was in high school my dad lost his job of 20 years due to a company merger and I remember him not even blinking an eye. He just kept his head up and started working in a different field – the financial industry. My brother now runs the (very successful) financial advising business that my father started. I am so proud of him!

When I was in middle school I remember watching my mom go back to college to earn her degree in teaching. I love this lesson reflecting on it now… it’s never too late to start a career or follow your dreams! Both of my parents had that in common. I can remember how excited she was when she landed her 1st teaching position and I have countless memories of helping her create things for her 1st grade classroom in the evenings and on weekends. I am incredibly grateful to my parents for showing me the value of hard work!

Interestingly enough, I think one of the best things my parents did for me was to not get everything right. My parents’ relationship was oftentimes tumultuous and I was sometimes confused about how to navigate the emotional landscape of a healthy relationship. I had a hard time talking about my feelings and expressing myself… I feel like the challenges my parents and I faced gave me the passion to work with children and families around emotions and relationships. One of my mentors, Dr. John Demartini, says that our voids determine our values. I love my job. It is so inspiring for me to help children and families connect, overcome, and increase their emotional health and wellbeing. I often remind the parents I work with now that it’s ok to not get everything right. In fact, I believe it’s impossible to get everything right and that it’s about turning the challenges into gifts for ourselves and our children.

Awesome – so before we get into the rest of our questions, can you briefly introduce yourself to our readers.

Sometimes I am unsure if I found the Play Therapy field or if it found me. I have worked with children for as long as I can remember! When I was really young, maybe toddler/elementary age, my mom ran an in-home daycare and I remember how much I enjoyed helping her take care of those kids, especially the babies or those younger than me. In high school, I became a children’s snowboarding instructor, babysitter, and nanny. When I started college I thought I wanted to be a high school social worker, but everything changed when I interned at a preschool for children with special needs…I absolutely fell in love with working with young kids!

As I began to work with younger kids more and more, it became apparent to me how misunderstood this age group was (and still is) in terms of difficult behaviors. I was desperate to understand why some of these children were so aggressive or shut down. This sent me on a mission to learn as much as I could about challenging behaviors, emotional wellness, and trauma. Once I was trained in EMDR (a type of trauma therapy) and then exposed to Synergetic Play Therapy, I never looked back. Synergetic Play Therapy has been instrumental in changing both my career and my own life.

At Play Therapy Connection, we provide Play Therapy to children ages 2-18 and our services take on a variety of forms. For ages 2-12 we focus on “play” therapy, whereas therapy can look different for ages 13-18 depending on the child’s maturity and developmental stage. I also provide therapy for adults and supervision and consultation to other Play Therapists in the field internationally.

Something that has been a game changer for our families is the integration of parent involvement and/or parent coaching in tandem with play therapy for the child. We are able to support families holistically, changing and family dynamics and healing on a systemic level. We use a holistic approach and believe that every challenging behavior is an attempt from the child to regulate themselves and/or to communicate something. We believe that every child, parent and family has the ability to heal!

I am extremely proud of the private practice I get the privilege of running and working in everyday. Our therapists are all Certified Synergetic Play Therapists and they are some of the most fantastic therapists and people in the field.

I am also an adjunct professor at the University of Denver where I teach Foundations of Play Therapy to graduate Social Work students. Lastly, but definitely not least, I am a huge proponent of the mind-body connection and supporting fellow therapists and colleagues. I am a certified yoga instructor and I host virtual yoga sessions designed specifically for therapists and those in the healing field to connect to themselves. I also offer a virtual support group for therapists to help ensure and support therapists on this journey of self-care as we support clients and families through their own challenges.

Putting training and knowledge aside, what else do you think really matters in terms of succeeding in your field?

I think the biggest key to my success and the advice I would give to anyone in this field is to know yourself deeply, thoroughly and truly, and to let others know you are not perfect. I am a therapist, yes, and I also see my own therapist. It is crucial to do self-work in order to serve my clients in the most effective way. Truly knowing and understanding myself, my history, my challenges, my growth and my own trauma were key to transforming me into the therapist I am today. The journey and work I’ve done with myself has given me the freedom to go deeper with my clients and, in turn, allowed me the privilege of seeing deeper and more impactful healing in my practice because of it!

Something else that has been helpful is the freedom to express this to my clients… clients are often relieved to know that I go to therapy as well. This makes me human. I want my clients to know I am not here to sit on the other side of the room at arm’s length and judge their challenges, way of parenting, or past mistakes. We all are figuring this out together! More often than not, when parents find their way into our practice, it is because they have reached a perceived breaking point and are feeling defeated, overwhelmed and feel like failures. It’s important to remind parents that they are not failing their children and are, in fact, modeling to their children and family that it is okay to ask for support and reach out for help. Asking for help, knowing yourself and getting in touch with your emotions are all incredibly important skills for families to learn to gain resilience and balance. I believe in walking alongside my clients healing journey as a partner instead of acting like I always have all the “right” answers. I am not afraid to talk to my clients about the challenges I face and overcome so that we can truly connect as people trying to better ourselves.

Any advice for growing your clientele? What’s been most effective for you?

Every family and child is unique and the clinicians at Play Therapy Connection work hard to make sure we are getting to know each individual and their unique needs, history, and circumstances. I often imagine each of my clients as if they are my friends or family. I want the connection to feel real, honest, and supportive. With this mindset our clientele really feel heard and seen.

Our referrals are largely word of mouth and I think this demonstrates that we really are connecting with families and making an impact in their lives. Being trusted to work with children and families is such a gift and it’s an honor when families tell others about what a difference working with us and engaging in play therapy has made in their lives. Viewing clients as numbers or dollar signs just doesn’t work.

Contact Info:

• Website: playtherapyconnection.com
• Instagram: instagram.com/playtherapyconnection/
• Facebook: facebook.com/playtherapyconnection
• Youtube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCuQqKX1SX52IpGSzeONUeXw

Image Credits
Headshot by Jessica Kimak