We’re excited to introduce you to the always interesting and insightful Katori Roussel. We hope you’ll enjoy our conversation with KaTori below.

KaTori, thanks for taking the time to share your stories with us today Was there a defining moment in your professional career? A moment that changed the trajectory of your career?

In 2021, my husband of 8 years died unexpectedly from heart failure. I was working for a nonprofit organization as one of their program coordinators. When I finally returned to work after an extended bereavement leave, I was immediately promoted to director. I was not mentally or emotionally prepared to take on that role and quickly felt overwhelmed and stuck. During this time, I experienced what we as widows call ” “widows fire.” Widow’s Fire is the phenomenon where widows and widowers can feel an uncontrollable desire for sex following the death of their partner. So, I decided to dive head-first into exploring my sexual desires and intimacy. As a new widow, I was lost. I had no idea what I liked, wanted, needed, or even what I could have because all of my sexual needs and desires were attached to my late husband. I spent more time as a married woman than a single adult woman. So dating and casual sex were new elements of my life that I could’ve easily been lost in. I set a few goals before I decided to dive in. My goals were to figure out what I liked, gain better discernment when getting to know people and have fun with no expectations. And boy, did I have fun! I realized that so many widows fall into that world of sexual exploration without the level of control that I was able to maintain, and they sometimes have consequences and outcomes that are not precisely things they can come back from. So, I decided to help lead other widows down a safer path through widow’s fire. Fast forward to 2024, after dealing with some heavy office drama and program dysfunction, I decided to step away from that role and focus on myself and my healing. This allowed me to redirect my energy to creating the Wild Widows Society.

Awesome – so before we get into the rest of our questions, can you briefly introduce yourself to our readers.

The Wild Widows Society was created while studying to become a certified sexual wellness educator. I had no idea what I would use that certification for. But I knew two things. I am a widow, and I have a lot of knowledge and passion for sexual and reproductive health. My mentor, Dr. Sara Sohn, helped me create a vision that would allow me to guide other widows down a beautiful journey of self-love, sexual expression, and confidence in creating intimate spaces. The Wild Widows Society is a sexual and intimacy coaching practice that focuses on helping widows navigate intimacy, sexual experiences, and pleasure after losing their spouse. The focus is to rediscover intimacy, self-love, and confidence by providing a safe, therapeutic, and exclusive space guided by expert coaching and collaboration with trusted mental health professionals. We offer widows referred by therapists a personalized and holistic coaching experience tailored to their unique journeys of healing and rediscovery in sex and intimacy. Our society provides a judgment-free, trauma-informed, supportive environment to help participants regain emotional and physical confidence. We offer individualized coaching sessions addressing self-image, boundaries, emotional safety, and sexual health, along with tailored guidance for rediscovering personal and partnered intimacy. I also host workshops & small, exclusive group sessions focusing on intimacy, communication, and empowerment. To become a “Wild Widow,” our intake process requires a referral from a licensed therapist to ensure readiness for coaching. We are developing our members-only portal with videos, articles, and exercises on sexual health, intimacy, and personal growth. My final goal for the Wild Widows Society is to create intimacy-focused weekend retreats designed to provide immersive experiences in healing and rediscovery.

Learning and unlearning are both critical parts of growth – can you share a story of a time when you had to unlearn a lesson?

Something I had to unlearn was that my job was not the most important thing in my life. After my husband died, my job was so understanding and allowed me the time off to grieve without worry. However, once I returned, I realized that so much of my energy was going into my workplace that I didn’t have any energy left to focus on my kids or myself. I’m now a single parent and my children’s sole provider. I needed to find the balance between my work and my home life. I also realized that I was totally replaceable to my organization but not to my kids. So, I had to unlearn, making work my priority. It taught me to prioritize placing myself first. I spent so much time and energy building up a program that didn’t belong to me and could be taken away at any time. So, I decided to create my own personal work environment.

If you could go back in time, do you think you would have chosen a different profession or specialty?

I’ve always wanted to be a sex coach. Ever since I took my first sex ed class in college, I realized the impact of having open conversations about sex. My career path so far has given me exactly what I needed to be in the space I am today. I went from teaching teens to talk to their friends about safe sex and abstinence, tracking down and educating individuals who contracted an STD, teaching relationship workshops, and managing programs and budgets. All of this prepared me to be a Sexual Wellness Educator. So, yes. I would definitely choose this profession again and would probably do it sooner.

Contact Info:

• Website: https://www.wildwidowssociety.com
• Instagram: @love_katori

Image Credits

Hype Girl Boudoir
Charles Molton Photography