We caught up with the brilliant and insightful Katie Alden a few weeks ago and have shared our conversation below.

Katie, thanks for taking the time to share your stories with us today Do you feel you or your work has ever been misunderstood or mischaracterized? If so, tell us the story and how/why it happened and if there are any interesting learnings or insights you took from the experience?

I had been misunderstood my entire upbringing and early professional career as a young female in the creative space. As someone who was raised in a very conservative and religious family, I was told to not show off my body, not be overly sexy/sexual and that if you’re too friendly, men will take advantage of you. Naturally, the rebel in me rebelled and wanted to do the exact opposite. I hated being restricted and controlled. It made me want to shut down and run away. The way I truly learn something, or not to do something is to be burned by it. This is not always the most effective way, but for me, that’s what it takes for me to fully learn what is good for me and what’s not. Just because someone tells me not to do something, doesn’t mean I’m going to listen. This naturally got me in a lot of trouble with my parents and they were very possessive of me because of this. They truly wanted the best for me and tried to shelter me away from the worlds’ troubles and pain but it didn’t work. It just made me want to chase those “off-limit” things even more.

I grew up very athletic and active and would like to say my parents passed along their good genes to me— I always had curves, an hourglass figure, a butt and bigger boobs than most of my friends especially at a young age. This obviously impacted how people (boys and men specifically) would treat me and their image of me. I learned at a young age the double edge sword of being “beautiful” and “desired” by men. When I told my parents I wanted to pursue modeling, they told me they didn’t support it, that I was going to be unsafe, taken advantage of and there are too many creeps out there. Naturally, they were right, but in a way part of me wanted to prove them wrong and I became naive and would think “That won’t happen to me— I’m smarter and I know better.”

So I went against what they wished for me, and I became even more confident in my curves and using my body to get what I wanted and advance further. I used to think that if a man gave me attention, it was a good day. I needed it, I craved it. I would get upset if a male didn’t complement my body, or told me I was sexy. It was a toxic cycle that I wasn’t even aware existed.

This idea of being seen for a body, a s*x object, and barely a human being with my own thoughts consumed me for many years. It really wasn’t until I had several toxic relationships that ended in flames, was taken advantage of by several men, and believing men in the industry that wanted to “support my modeling career” that really only wanted to get in my pants, did I realize that I hit rock bottom and I hated the way it made me feel. I felt hopeless, empty, and I felt as if this body I was given was cursed. Why did no one see me for my personality? Why can’t people respect me for me, instead of just how I look? It was because I didn’t respect myself. I instantly reflected back on my entire life: realizing I never knew or could stand up for myself in an argument, relationships, to my parents, to friends—I allowed men to take advantage of me without any question or hesitation even if after I was left feeling empty and neglected. After this major reflection and the overall feeling of disgust and wanting to forget the first 20 years of my entire life— I came to this realization that in order for others to take me seriously and respect me, I had to respect myself. It’s easier said than done and I’m jealous of people that were born with this knowledge— But it is my story and my own growth path. It’s something that takes constant work. But it is necessary to advance in this world, especially as a young female creative in this industry. It is empowering to establish boundaries, trust my gut on modeling gigs, collaborations, and decide if something is for my benefit or not. I am in charge of where my career goes and who I let into my life. My body and mind are a temples and they need to be treated as such.

This lack of respect is a common theme among many human beings. Unfortunately this is not something that is an overnight fix. It is decades and decades of misunderstood social cues, standards, generational trauma, and honestly the wrong people in power that have formed this misunderstanding of boundaries, expectations, and what it means to respect others bodies. I do not regret anything in my life, and it has shaped me to be the person I am today. I am able to fight for my rights, for what I want, and I want others to feel as empowered as I do.

Katie, before we move on to more of these sorts of questions, can you take some time to bring our readers up to speed on you and what you do?

I grew up as a photographer. I was obsessed with taking pictures of random items, nature, and loved the contrast of light and shadow and details of items unclose. I also loved taking selfies. I was my own muse. I was always made fun of my by friends for taking hundreds of selfies on my camera. I started modeling in front of the camera at a young age: I would set up a tripod and use a blank wall in my parents house to act as a backdrop. I would post on Facebook and was bullied by the other girls for posting so many selfies and pictures of myself. I didn’t care— I loved it and I wanted to create art. I was creative and didn’t see it as being self centered.

I studied Fashion Merchandising at Marist College, studied abroad in Florence Italy, and interned in New York City before moving to the city. I always pursued modeling on the low-key side– I never had anyone support me. My family and friends thought it was unsafe, weird and that that wasn’t a real career. After the pandemic lockdown happened, I decided that this was my time. I wasn’t going to listen to anyone else regarding my future, my desires, and what I wanted to accomplish in my life. I put myself out there. I joined all the Facebook modeling pages and reached out to random photographers that I thought to be a good fit. I began to build connections, my portfolio, and my social media presence as well as my presence in the industry. I truly believe in manifestation and if you put yourself out there, the energy will come back to you. Hard work pays off. Everything I have done as far as my modeling career, I can accredit to the people I have met along the way by me putting myself out there and diving full force into my dreams. That is what I am the most proud of.

As far as modeling goes, I love lingerie, boudoir, street wear, walking in fashion shows, commercial modeling, and acting. I am excited to continue to be a force in the industry and help others find their path and voice.

Is there something you think non-creatives will struggle to understand about your journey as a creative? Maybe you can provide some insight – you never know who might benefit from the enlightenment.

I think this is a very important topic. When I started off in modeling a lot of the gigs I did were collaborations or TFP. All of my friends who are not creatives told me not to do it, that it’s not professional and that I should be paid for my work. They didn’t understand that you can’t expect to be paid right off the bat with 0 experience. You need to build up your portfolio, do the “dirty work” and establish yourself as credible before someone will pay you for your work. This is like a job. You can’t expect to be the President of Amazon straight out of college with 0 experience. This is something that is very important. I put in the work for about 2 years, and now I am receiving paid work and can make more money in one day working freelance or modeling that I do in my full time corporate job. The industry takes patience and resilience. It’s not for the weak or for people who don’t have a passion for it. Everything takes time, just like nature. You put in the work, and invest in your future, and you will succeed and blossom.

Have you ever had to pivot?

This story is semi recently and one of the best decisions of my life. My entire life I feel as though I was told what to do, how to act, and what is “right/smart” instead of trusting my gut and following my passions. I was at a job for the past 3 years and it was my first job right out of college. I was young, inexperienced, and eager to learn. I was in love with the job for a while until covid happened. It changed my view point on my life, my career path and I really took a step back and tried to refocus my priorities. I began to feel stagnant in my career. My job basically told me there was no career path or growth for me to expand in another department.
I had always loved events: Planning and executing, and seeing the final result and all the parts coming together was such an amazing feeling. I always wanted to pursue event planning but was told by family and friends that I shouldn’t pursue that as a career path. For the past 3 years I put that dream on hold because I didn’t want to disappoint my family and I was scared to take that leap— Until one day it hit me. I was so miserable and depressed at my old job and I realized I was tired of feeling this way. I needed a change and needed to get out. After hundreds of job applications and months of interviewing and hearing “we were impressed with your resume but we have decided to move in a different direction”, I felt very discouraged. I felt as though the world was testing me and I didn’t know how much longer I could take it. Just when I was about to give up and surrender to my own doubts, I found my dream job. I am now planning some of the biggest parties in NYC and hosting major celebrities. I followed my dreams, ignored the doubts and fears, and am thriving.

Contact Info:

• Website: https://katiealden19.wixsite.com/my-site
• Instagram: @katiealden_ and @kati.emarie
• Linkedin: https://www.linkedin.com/in/katie-alden-22353a158/

Image Credits
Diane Zhao Photography, Dorothy Shi Studio, Forrest Renaissance, Lauren Cassot, Will Foster