We recently connected with Kairis Rivera and have shared our conversation below.

Kairis, looking forward to hearing all of your stories today. I’m sure there have been days where the challenges of being an artist or creative force you to think about what it would be like to just have a regular job. When’s the last time you felt that way? Did you have any insights from the experience?

As much as I love acting and performing, I have felt utterly low when in-between things. I am fortunate to have loved ones who believe in me when I struggle to do so, but the hard truth is that this has to come from within.

It is easy to slip into the what-ifs-
What if I majored in STEM? What if I gave up on acting 5years ago? What if I’m just mediocre? Or What if I just like attention?

But the truth is that, in a parallel universe where I did not choose acting, I, without a doubt, will be wondering what if I chose my dream. Oddly enough, I would feel hopeless for not pursuing a career I know I am capable of. It’s ironic how I can easily believe in myself when I am on the outside looking in.

With that, I wonder and long for imminent stability. I am in the artistic world, and I have to remind myself that stability needs to consult itself as a matter of time.

Acting is not giving me stability at the moment. Not yet. Again, it is tempting to run towards my ideal notion of productivity, a 9-5 job. However, I carefully ask myself if I am running away from the acting industry’s hardships. If so, do these hardships define the acting industry?

As much as I love to be creative, it is not easy in a capitalistic world, and being able to dissect these tough questions is easier said than done.

Kairis, before we move on to more of these sorts of questions, can you take some time to bring our readers up to speed on you and what you do?

As an actor, poet, and overall community member, I specialized in being a vessel for new work. As much as I find fulfillment in traditional and classical theatrical work, especially amid people’s head scratching and asking why cast me, there is something special in new work. There is a wave of artists contributing to the theatrical canon in ways I could have never imagined. I am creative with nothing and everything to prove. Thus, I have decided to pursue work that reminds me of the stories I grew up hearing and witnessing; Stories that discuss womanhood, generational troubles, migration, Indigeniety, and love. I am most proud of being a part of Juan Ramirez Jr.’s The American Dream, produced by Subtext Studio TC and directed by Omar Fernandez. It was my first time playing a Guatemalan character, and I am immensely grateful. As a Mexican and Q’eqchi indigenous Guatemalan actor, I have struggled to find individuals who create a platform for Central American narratives on stage. I am immensely grateful, as this was the first production some of my relatives felt was a truthful and urgent story.

I am the product of 5 older siblings, who have shown me what support and love embodies. It was an honor to share a story that they felt spoke to their narrative, and I am proud that I could honor them in this way. I will forever use my talent and values to attract people whose goals are to hone in generational storytelling to connect themes of healing and resilience.

Let’s talk about resilience next – do you have a story you can share with us?

Every so often, I must ask myself if I am strong enough for this industry. My resilience lies in knowing my truth, lineage, and talent. I have often worked in rooms where I knew I was there for numbers or the benefit of the doubt. From a professor doubting my capability in doing Shakespeare to a talent agent telling me I have a Chola accent that will hinder my acting opportunities.

I will share my story of rejection because it is one many actors face, and picking myself up is one of many things I can count on. However, that does not make rejection hurt any less, especially when rejection comes with some microaggressions and racism.

This year, I applied for a talent agency for the second time. I was proud of myself for making it to the second stage of interviewing with the talent agency, and as I submitted a self-tape, I awaited their response. Shortly after, I read an email stating they would not represent me but wish me the best. As I looked closely, their reason was merely about numbers and how they have enough talent in a specific category. There is no room for me in a category of people like me.

Two thoughts came up with this news. One, I am a product. I am something that can be categorized and marketed. It simply becomes about numbers. If I cannot sell, I am not valued.

Two, they have enough of me. They have enough of whatever I am to them. There is plenty of me, so much so that there is no room for me.

I wondered if they had plenty of people like me. I am Q’eqchi native, Mexican, queer, and first-generation, and I’ve been in rooms where I was the only person. At that moment, I did not know it, but there I was debating my labeling, as if that would make a difference and as if I had to prove a point as to why I am marketable.

Now, I am distant from my immediate reaction and am disappointed that I mistook an opportunity in my career as an opportunity to reduce myself as a product.

I had to dwell on the reality of being in this industry. Although I love acting, the acting industry may not love me back. However, the acting industry is not synonymous with the theatre industry. I fell in love with stories, and as long as I am with people who gather to tell stories, the industry will love me back.

Rejection will continue to prevail as long as I put myself out there. I am not immune to rejection, and the microaggressions sometimes hit harder than others. However, I come from a resilient people. Of course, I will continue to prosper.

Is there a particular goal or mission driving your creative journey?

I strive to work on producing and participating in narratives that focus on Indigeneity in Latin American stories. Latinindad has left me wounded as it promotes a generalization of identity, mestizaje, and brushes of Indigeniety as a time of the past. I have brought my concerns and conversations to rooms with no interest in hearing them. A talent agent stated that I focused too much on the past, which left me feeling as if my Indigeneity was of the past and if I had to choose to put it behind me. I am not in no way going to do that.

Growing up, I was only Mexican, point blank, period. There is no need to scavenge other affiliations or lineage because all I present as is “Latina.” My goal is to continue to ask within Latin American theatre artists, when do we participate in Indigenous erasure, or do we know the dangers of mestizaje when one affiliates with a First Nation?

Theatre artists must ask where and how we practice colonial frameworks. We cannot work in a world that continues to showcase and profit from a generalization of people. I hope to bring this awareness through my work as a performer and writer, but the reality is that my presence simply brings these conversations.

Contact Info:

• Website: Still in the works*
• Instagram: @Unpocobougie
• Linkedin: www.linkedin.com/in/kairisrivera
• Twitter: @Unpocobougie

Image Credits
Jabari Khaliq, Artemisia Theatre, Contratiempo Radio, Subtext Studio TC,