We recently connected with Joy Mukiri and have shared our conversation below.

Alright, Joy thanks for taking the time to share your stories and insights with us today. What’s the backstory behind how you came up with the idea for your business?

Let’s take it back to why I started this work. When I decided to become a Trauma-Informed Mindset Coach, it was an idea that I had been brewing for quite a bit- I didn’t know there was a place for it in our communities. So even though I was working with family members and friends in this area, I always thought it was just good advice and not an actual profession.

During my time in the Navy, I experienced a lot of unpleasant bosses, coworkers, and systems. It became clear that there was more underlying because people couldn’t possibly be so cruel for no apparent reason, right? So during my time, I became a sort of investigative social scientist (I owe my biology undergrad degree for this wonderful characteristic!). I made it a hobby to study people, and I quickly realized that many of the people I encountered had so much unresolved trauma that they were regurgitating and recycling. Through conversations with my friends and coworkers and careful observation and analysis, I realized that a power trip was just another attempt at trying to be seen and assert our good-enoughness. At this point, I had been in leadership positions in different industries throughout my life. I had worked in a leadership program, gotten trained by Act Six, a leadership organization for urban youth, and held roles in a different capacity. Without knowing it, leadership had become something I subconsciously enjoyed and was always learning more about. In all my experiences, I hadn’t encountered anything as I had with the military leadership, which was quite a shock.
I wasn’t expecting that- I knew the Hollywood version of it. You know, Marines doing pushups, drills, and carrying guns. But as I was going through the process myself as an educated immigrant black woman serving as enlisted, I quickly realized the Hollywood version was just that- Hollywood-ish! So when I separated from the military, I returned to school for my Master of Arts in Organizational Leadership because I couldn’t stomach seeing a problem and not helping solve it. Then the pandemic hit, and things turned different for the whole world. I planned to go into Human Resources because I felt I would pursue that as my post-military career since I loved people, culture, and leadership. After doing my research and talking to people in the industry, I quickly realized that was not what I saw for myself. So now I was back to the drawing board and looking for where I could fit in.

That’s when I hired my first ever Coach- honestly, it was one of the best decisions I had ever made. She helped me clarify my purpose, dreams, and vision for my career through Strength-Based Coaching and uncovering the subconscious beliefs that had gotten me to where I was. I quickly realized that what she did for people was what I had been doing my whole life, and I loved it! So I made a plan to research coaching and become a coach myself.
My coaching and consulting practice were birthed from seeing a need that was not met, and that was trauma-informed coaching and mindset coaching through subconscious reprogramming. Many people talk about changing habits without looking at the root cause of these behaviors. And there wasn’t much talk about the traumas, especially childhood traumas that people go through and continue to live from that stuck place their whole lives. My heart has always been to serve, help and uplift communities. And I quickly realized that women of color and underrepresented communities were the demographic I truly wanted to help. I had had too many conversations & experiences with friends, family members, acquaintances, and colleagues and realized a considerable commonality. We need to figure out our traumatic cycles and the resources to know what to do about them.

I was so scared and had the biggest imposter syndrome, but I went for it anyway with no certification or anything. I just knew I had been helping people for a while. They liked it, it worked, and I could help even more than just my friends and family. I also knew some people truly needed a safe space to be seen, heard, and allowed to show up just as they were without judgment.

Awesome – so before we get into the rest of our questions, can you briefly introduce yourself to our readers.

I am a Trauma-Informed Embodiment Coach and Consultant. I work with fempreneurs, a fancy word for female entrepreneurs that want to change the male-dominated narrative of running a business by using all of themselves instead of muting parts of who they are to be more masculine in the business world. My work is centered around holistic coaching using mindset work through subconscious reprogramming, trauma release healing, and purpose activation. I use neurolinguistic programming, emotional freedom and mastery, intuitive energetic release, leadership coaching through personal development, and helping women find their purpose. I take the holistic approach because of my belief and value of human beings as multifaceted creatures with a mind, body, and soul. Therefore, help women visionaries heal from the inside out, find who they are and what they are called to birth into the world, and change-makers.

I saw a need for women leaders and visionaries to get support in a way that I had not previously seen before. So many women had phenomenal ideas, solutions, talents, strengths, and capabilities that weren’t utilized because society had put them in a box or they were recycling traumas, inner wounds, and past hurts. So it’s not that they didn’t want to create an impact. They did not know how to get out of their way. I also realized that so many intergenerational and childhood traumas in underrepresented communities weren’t being discussed. Everyone knew about the dirty older man touching kids or the uncle no one talked about, but nothing was being done to help those little girls who became women ridden with guilt, shame, and a chest of secrets. I love helping these amazingly talented women release that trauma energy, become self-aware, and ditch those subconscious beliefs rooted in trauma wounds so they can feel liberated to become who they genuinely envision themselves to be. As someone that has been through childhood trauma & sexual abuse, I understand how it robs women of their identity. Your body becomes a foreign place you exist in, and your mind becomes a battlefield that never lets you rest. I have first-hand experience in doing this work and have been able to heal those wounded parts of me with the help of therapy, coaching, mindset work, and inner child healing.

My programs center on inner child healing, subconscious reprogramming, and self-leadership, which sets me apart from other life and business coaches. I also take the approach of helping women find their purpose and create a vision for their lives because I value the differences in all of us. We were created as magnificent beings capable of anything, and I feel it would be a disservice if I didn’t help female leaders unlock this powerful blueprint for themselves.

I want people to understand that they do not have to be a photoco[y of anyone else, but they’re original. Yes, I know it’s challenging to be authentic in who you are unapologetically, but that’s where the gold is. We need people/leaders who are not afraid to show their flaws. We need people who aren’t afraid to be vulnerable, speak their minds, and bring into the world the incredible ideas, products, services, and creativity we so desperately need. I tend to think that as we liberate ourselves from societal standards and the status quo and push the envelope on truly finding beauty in our humanness, we help others do the same. We give others permission to go after what they want and release what no longer serves them and the highest good.

I bring ALL my life experiences into my work. I have learned that who we are, our talents, strengths, gifts, weaknesses, and capabilities all have a place in the work we do. I am a Kenyan-American immigrant, veteran, and digital nomad with an educational background in science, leadership & psychology with many different life experiences that make up who I am. And I celebrate all of it because it all makes up who I am. My uniqueness is my superpower.

Can you share a story from your journey that illustrates your resilience?

I recently hit a huge burnout season that had me physically, emotionally, and mentally on my hands and knees. It was a moment where I had to reevaluate my relationship with my business honestly. Being someone that used to derive her identity from achievements, success, and service, I was majorly disappointed in myself as a business owner. I felt like a failure because I was judging my success on other people and the mainstream’s definition of success which is money and fame. I had previously worked on and released many of my success beliefs because I knew that it was easy for me to derive my identity and worth in what I was doing and not who I was BEing and becoming. But here I was as a business owner, struggling with so much shame, self-judgment, and disappointment. I had to return to that inner child and tend to her needs. I had to ask the hard questions and identify and heal those parts of myself that still held on to the belief that I was a failure. I had to figure out who’s the voice in my head and what story I was identifying with. That process was challenging! There were depressive episodes, anxiety and a lot of introspection, meditation, snotty-nosed journaling, and hard vulnerable conversations. But what that taught me was how cyclical life is. We move in cycles and rhythms. Tilling, planting, growing, and uprooting. They don’t always go in that order, but once I allowed myself to be fully in the cycle without self-judgment and full of compassion and awareness, it was easier to release, learn and let go of what I needed to so that I could make room for what life had in store for me.

We often hear about learning lessons – but just as important is unlearning lessons. Have you ever had to unlearn a lesson?

I had to unlearn that my identity was not in what I did but in who I was as a person.

My whole life, I wanted to become a doctor. I joke around and say that in my African immigrant culture, about four jobs mean you made it, or you are doing something with your life- doctor, lawyer, engineer, pilot. I grew up poor, so I was taught from the get-go that education would be the only thing to get me out of my situation. And I didn’t want to be poor anymore, so I studied my butt off! In my young mind, I knew one of those professions would have to be the answer. And since I truly loved helping people and was brilliant, I decided being a doctor was the route. Everything I did in my childhood and young adult years prepared me for a career as a doctor. I remember being a part of St. John’s Ambulance club in Kenya which was pretty much nurse training but for teenagers, and feeling so happy that I was doing something to make my dreams come true.

When I moved to the States at 17, I quickly did a college program that gave me high school credits. I got my Associate of Arts at 19 and transferred to a four-year school for my Bachelor in Science. I graduated after three years and decided to join the Navy to get educational benefits to go to medical school and practice medicine in the military for a bit. I had it ALL figured out, LOL. My 20+ year life plan was going as planned. Until I realized that’s not what I wanted. And that shattered my sense of identity! I didn’t know anything else- I had worked my whole life up to that point only to realize that maybe that wasn’t my dream after all. Here I was, having sacrificed so much of my life to end up learning that I wanted something different for myself. Yes, I loved helping and serving people, but maybe that wasn’t the only way I could do it. Tracing it back to where it started, I realized my culture and upbringing had much to do with my decisions. I NEEDED to make my family proud at whatever cost. I needed to feel important, not like the poor little girl from Africa. But at what cost? Was I truly going to be happy? Was it a profession that would allow me to explore all of who I am? These are some of the stories I battled with for a couple of years until I released myself from the massive burden of expectations I had of myself. Many factors went into my decision not to continue pursuing medicine, and as much as I felt ashamed and guilty. Like a failure, because my identity was so wrapped up in that profession, for the first time, I experienced freedom and liberation to do and become whomever I chose to. This was when I decided I wanted to get into leadership which opened up the coaching and consulting world.

Contact Info:

• Website: https://joymukiricoaching.mykajabi.com
• Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/thejoymukiri/
• Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/thejoymukiri
• Linkedin: https://www.linkedin.com/in/joy-mukiri
• Other: Pinterest: https://pin.it/33ZbSjw Email: [email protected]

Image Credits
Carina Fleckner