We recently connected with Jessie Santiago and have shared our conversation below.

Alright, Jessie thanks for taking the time to share your stories and insights with us today. Was there a moment in your career that meaningfully altered your trajectory? If so, we’d love to hear the backstory.

Yes, there was a defining moment. It wasn’t flashy or dramatic but more like a quiet, internal reckoning that changed everything.

For over two decades, I was a hairstylist, educator, and salon owner. I had built something I was incredibly proud of—a trauma-informed, queer-centered salon that became a kind of sanctuary for people who never felt quite at home in traditional beauty spaces. I was using my skills and my heart to care for people.
But somewhere along the way, I started to feel the limits of what beauty work alone could hold.

Plus- I was exhausted. My body was breaking down. I was witnessing deep emotional unraveling in my clients, and myself, but I had no tools to support any of it.

The moment came slowly, but with certainty. One day, I realized I wasn’t just burned out, I was being called in. I closed the salon. It felt terrifying and sacred all at once. People thought I was stepping away from my career, but in truth, I was expanding it. Honestly, I think people thought I was crashing out. Maybe I was a little but really… something had to change.

enrolled in clinical hypnotherapy college. I dove into energy work. I redefined what it means to offer beauty to people, not as surface, but as self-relationship, transformation, integration.

The day I decided to leave the salon and listen to my body and my spirit changed everything. It taught me that endings are just portals to new beginnings. That rest is a strategy. Our calling evolves if we’re brave enough to follow it. And that beauty, when reclaimed, can be a profoundly spiritual act.

Now, I work at the intersection of subconscious healing, ritual, and expression. And it’s the most aligned I’ve ever felt.

As always, we appreciate you sharing your insights and we’ve got a few more questions for you, but before we get to all of that can you take a minute to introduce yourself and give our readers some of your back background and context?

I’m Jessie Santiago, also known as The Subliminal Stylist. I’m a certified hypnotherapist, intuitive healer, and former salon owner with over two decades of experience in beauty and care work. I specialize in subconscious transformation, trauma-informed healing, and ritual-based self-expression. My work lives at the intersection of hypnosis, identity, energy, and the quiet magic of reclaiming your power.

My journey started behind the chair, offering haircuts, but even then, it was never just about hair. I created spaces where people could soften, unravel, and feel safe being fully themselves, especially folks who are queer, trans, neurodivergent, or healing from systemic harm.

I founded and ran Salon Benders, one of the first explicitly queer-centered, trauma-informed salons in Southern California. But over time, I began to feel the limits of beauty work alone. I witnessed how many people were carrying invisible weight. Their stories, patterns, survival strategies were deeply affecting me and I wanted tools to go deeper, to meet them in the subconscious where real change begins.
So I pivoted. I became a hypnotherapist, blending everything I’d learned in the beauty industry with subconscious healing modalities.

Now, I offer hypnotherapy, ritualistic hair sessions, Reiki-infused energy work, and community-centered healing spaces, both virtual and in person. I also host a podcast and write a Substack, where I talk about everything from decolonizing mental health to mysticism, identity, and daily life as a queer femme healer.

My work is for people already on their healing journey who want to deepen their relationships with themselves, their communities and their minds. It’s for those shedding old skins, grieving past versions of themselves, and learning how to live more fully in their bodies and truth.

What sets my work apart is its integration. I don’t just address surface. I work with the deep rooted systems that lead to maladaptive behaviors and habits. My sessions are emotionally intelligent, culturally attuned, and infused with a blend of science, spirit, and lived experience. I believe healing should be both rigorous and gentle, mystical and grounded, personal and collective.

I’m most proud of the trust I’ve built with the people who’ve come to me. In their most vulnerable moments they’ve left feeling more whole, more seen. I’m proud that I’ve stayed true to my values in both beauty and wellness—that haven’t always made space for people like me, or the communities I serve.

And truthfully, I’ve lost people too. As I continue to receive the same deep healing I offer others, I’ve had to grow and growth isn’t always pretty. It’s meant letting go of relationships I once held dear. People I’ve loved and respected have left my life-maybe because they think I’m too weird, too woo woo, too much. Or maybe they just weren’t ready for the kind of depth I’m inviting them into.

Still, I’m proud that I keep showing up. Even when I’m questioning myself, I’m also listening to the deepest part of me. The part that knows I’m exactly where I’m meant to be.

If you’re curious about working with me, just know: I’m not here to fix you. I’m here to support your remembering. Your body already knows how to heal. Your subconscious already holds the wisdom. I’m just here to guide you back to it.

Learning and unlearning are both critical parts of growth – can you share a story of a time when you had to unlearn a lesson?

One of the biggest lessons I’ve had to unlearn is that my worth is tied to how much I give, produce, or hold for other people.

For a long time, I was operating under this constant pressure to be everything for everyone. I operated with this underlying belief in every area of life, including work.

In the beauty industry, I was offering so much more than just hair services. I was creating emotional safety, holding deep stories, tending to people’s nervous systems without even having the language or training for it yet. And I loved it… but I also burned out in a huge way. I think a lot of us in caregiving roles are taught that love means overextending, that being of service means self-abandonment. That if you’re not exhausted, you’re not doing enough.

Eventually, it all caught up with me-physically, emotionally, spiritually. When I closed my salon, it wasn’t just a professional pivot, it was a reclamation of my energy. I started to realize I couldn’t keep offering healing without receiving it. I couldn’t keep making space for others without making space for myself. That unlearning has been deep and ongoing.

Now, my work is rooted in reciprocity. I’ve learned to hold space without depleting myself. I’m still growing and I’m far from perfect. I overcorrect, overextend and mess up all the time. I just keep reminding myself that I’m not the authority in healing, I’m on the journey too.

Training and knowledge matter of course, but beyond that what do you think matters most in terms of succeeding in your field?

Other than training and knowledge, I think what’s most helpful for succeeding in this field, whether we’re talking about hypnotherapy or beauty work, is the ability to listen deeply and stay regulated. People don’t come to me just for techniques or credentials. They come to feel safe enough to unravel. That requires presence, emotional intelligence, and a willingness to be with discomfort—mine and theirs.

Both hypnosis and beauty work are intimate. You’re literally touching the subconscious or the body. That’s sacred. Sacred work doesn’t always move in a straight line. So you have to have patience. You have to be grounded with enough critical thinking to hold nuance. You have to keep doing your own healing so you’re not projecting your stuff onto your clients. Even the best of the best still do this because we are human, but to cause the least amount of harm, you must be able to know what’s happening and take responsibility.

I also think adaptability is huge. Every client is different. Every session is different. What worked one day might not land the next. The more I can stay curious instead of needing to be right or perfect or “the fixer”, the more impactful my work becomes.

And honestly? Courage. It takes courage to trust your instincts, to step outside the rigid boxes of how healing is “supposed” to look, and to create something that reflects your lived truth. That’s what has kept me going—the choice to follow what feels real, even when it’s uncertain.

Contact Info:

• Website: https://TheSubliminalStylist.com
• Instagram: The.subliminalstylist
• Youtube: @the subliminal stylist
• Other: Substack: https://substack.com/@subliminalstylist?r=41di7a&utm_medium=ios

Image Credits

Amber Houlgin