We recently connected with Jennifer Ebenezer and have shared our conversation below.

Jennifer , thanks for taking the time to share your stories with us today We’re complete cheeseballs and so we love asking folks to share the most heartwarming moment from their career – do you have a touching moment you can share with us?

People have a tendency – maybe subconsciously – maybe not – to shy away from the people that are suffering. Whether its illness, divorce, arrest, addiction, mental health struggles, physical limitations, grief, depression, homelessness, identity crises, family issues, etc. People have a tendency to scurry away. They placate themselves by saying they don’t want to bother anyone or that the issue is private or the person in question probably wants to be alone. Then they comfort themselves with their usual distractions and all of their blessings and luxuries without ever quite recognizing them as such. Its the very special people of this Earth that choose to run towards wounded souls instead of away from them. In general, people say things like – “thoughts and prayers”- and “call me if you need anything”- but I wonder if they ever take the time to sit down and meaningfully pray with that person as their prayer intention or to call that person and offer help instead of waiting for that person to summon the strength to be able to identify what they need and who to ask for it.

You see we are here to walk each other home. We are supposed to be taking care of each other. We are supposed to be leading with love and with light and with kindness. You need only connect with nature or with children to understand that. We are not supposed to be consumed by money and anxiety and greed and consumerism and competition and celebrity and vanity. We are a human collective sharing a human condition and we are all intrinsically connected and we are all experiencing pain on some level. The circumstances surrounding each of us may be unique but the emotions we all experience are not.
To reject or ignore each other’s bids for help is to deny that intrinsic connection. When someone is drowning in the situation they are in in their life, you cannot begin to understand how much someone offering a gulp of air from the outside can mean. No one expects you to be the one to actually pull them out of the water, dry them off, warm them, get them new clothes, get them back home and send them on their way. Everyone in deep water knows that the act of being saved is a personal one. However, the more gulps of air they are offered from the outside – the higher their chance of survival. And when you are in survival mode, that means everything.

No one believes you are too busy. No one believes you don’t have time. The message you have actually sent to the person you purport to love and care about – especially deeply if they have actually summoned the courage and the vulnerability to actually voice their pain and their need for help – is that they simply do not register high enough on your priority list for you to make time or reserve energy to help them. They can see what you do have time and energy for and they know that it is not them. This isn’t necessarily as heartbreaking as you might imagine. For, in time, they will find their tribe. By the grace of God, somebody will hear them, see them, help them and lift them. By the small gulps of air that they are given by the people that genuinely do love them and pray for them and prioritize them, they will eventually start treading water, breathing deeper, swimming, and then make it to shore exhausted and be able to rest before finding their way home.

You see, my friends, love is not vacant words. Love is what you do. Love is action. Love is intention. Love does not place the burden of proof upon the one who is suffering. Love is a cup of coffee. Love is a prayer with intention. Love is a lit candle with some good juju sent their way. Love is a nice comment on Facebook encouraging them. Love is a phone call telling them that you don’t know how to help but you’re willing to. Love is a greeting card. Love is a letter. Love is toys for their kids. Love is a meal. Love is a picked up tab. Love is a fairytale birthday. Love is sending the song that makes you think of them. Love is sending them a picture of the moon. Love is a fond memory. Love is warm soup. Love is babysitting. Love is a soft blanket. Love is taking them to a court date or a doctor’s appointment so they don’t have to go alone. Love is a visit with flowers at their bedside. Love is telling them they can be part of your family because their own family is abusive. Love is telling a stranger you love her hair or his shoes because you do. Love is holding the door. Love is a bubble bath. Love is their favorite tea made their favorite way. Sure, love can be shown in grand gestures, but it can also be in leaving dimes behind because you know someone who finds them and thinks they’re dropped from heaven. Love and kindness are magic and they are the currency in which we are all saving each other bit by bit, moment by moment.

You never know when you’re going to be the next up to bat. That’s the exquisitely excruciating thing about life. We are always just a moment away from a diagnosis, a loss, a changed mind, an accident, an evil intention, a fire, etc. We are walking a delicate balance between joy and grief throughout the time we get to explore this lifetime together. We don’t actually own anything. Even our children are borrowed to us and entrusted in our love and care. We embody this space between our ancestors and our children and we hope to somehow make them both proud and to do something meaningful and to make our mark.

I read recently a quote from Chogyam Trungpa that said, “The only true elegance is vulnerability.” My goal with my one, sacred, blessed life then is to be endlessly elegant. I wish to always acknowledge suffering when I see it and offer the gulps of air that I can so that I can provide someone an easier passage to survival. I wish to always acknowledge and honor my own suffering as I do believe that the most beautiful humans – much like gemstones – are forged under intense pressure. I invite you to join me – not just in the holiday season – but for the rest of your life – in being endlessly elegant with me. Let us spread love and light and kindness everywhere we can. Let us offer gulps of air – no matter how small or big we can afford – to anyone we see drowning. Let us elevate our level of humanity and be a little more vulnerable in all directions while we lovingly walk each other home.

Great, appreciate you sharing that with us. Before we ask you to share more of your insights, can you take a moment to introduce yourself and how you got to where you are today to our readers.

I am a mother, an author, a content creator and I am passionate about soul growth, expanded consciousness, kindness and cultivating a beautiful human experience.

Can you share a story from your journey that illustrates your resilience?

Resiliency is developed in the moments where your life takes turns that you never expected and couldn’t have prepared for. Our strength lies in waiting and comes to the forefront when we need it. I have had medical situations that required a level of resilience that I never imagined needing. However, the time of my life that has called upon the highest level of resilience I have known thus far has been divorce. Everything I thought was true about my future and my journey in motherhood and partnership turned in a moment and I found myself without access to the resources I relief upon emotionally, financially, and mentally. Suddenly my children and I had to stay with family and we didn’t have access to money or our belongings. Pulling myself up out of that was the hardest thing I have had to figure out and yet it showed me what a force I am to be reckoned with. I found out who is really in this life with me and what is really important. It triggered a spiritual awakening within me that has made me show up for myself and my children in a whole new way and surviving through and thriving past that had taught me that we can get through anything.

Training and knowledge matter of course, but beyond that what do you think matters most in terms of succeeding in your field?

I think being successful at anything in life means truly, deeply understanding that we are a human being serving other human beings first. As long as we can keep kindness and humanity at the forefront of the ways in which we serve, we will be leaving everything and everybody better for having interacted with us and what a legacy that is.

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