We recently connected with Jamie Sarche and have shared our conversation below.
Jamie, looking forward to hearing all of your stories today. Let’s start with a story that highlights an important way in which your brand diverges from the industry standard.
Many years ago a friend told me, if you want to sell a hat, you have to wear a hat. I immediately got and paid for my own burial plan, then my husband did his plan, then our parents made their plans. Working with my family, I could easily question the choices being made by the people I know so well. I didn’t worry that they would use someone else, which allowed me to be authentic in my approach. I learned to make sure my clients know what their choices mean, to ask questions that help them articulate what values they are really trying to meet, and to help them give their families the gift of a healthy and healing bereavement. I learned not to be an order taker, but an educator.
The business I am in, funeral planning, leans heavily on the idea that each of us should be planning ahead so that we get what WE want. So many people say, “I don’t need a funeral.” They get focused on the idea that there will be a dead body and they have to get rid of the dead body. If they think about it like taking out the trash, they only have to call the “Man with the Van.” However, by doing that, they totally ignore the grief needs of their family or their community!
We live in a world that says, “don’t think about death, don’t talk about death.” That means when people DO talk about death, they often don’t know what they’re talking about. I believe the reason I am successful and why I get so many referrals is that I truly get on the same side of the table with my clients. I interact with them in a completely transparent way and they trust that I am committed to getting them what they want and need.
To do that, I have to listen to more than just the words they say. I have to probe to understand more about who they are and what their family and community connections are. I went to visit a couple in their home to put together a prearranged funeral plan. The husband, Bob, told me they both wanted to be cremated. He said they just didn’t see any need to be buried. “No one ever goes to the cemetery anyway.” Of course, he proceeded to tell me that they always visit his parents’ graves when they go back east.
I asked them some questions and learned a little about their backgrounds. The wife, Fran, was an 80 year old Jewish woman from Berlin. German, Jewish, 80 years old? I asked her if she was a holocaust survivor. We talked a bit about her experiences.
I asked her thoughts about cremation? She replied, “when I think about the crematory, I think about those crematories.” Of course! How could she not! Then she shared that she figured out how to live with cremation because her ashes would feed the flowers. I said, “if I told you that cremated remains
are actually toxic to plants, how would you feel about that?” I shared that if she truly wanted her body to feed the earth, the flowers, trees and bushes, green burial, alkaline hydrolysis or body composting actually meet her needs.
Great, appreciate you sharing that with us. Before we ask you to share more of your insights, can you take a moment to introduce yourself and how you got to where you are today to our readers
My calling is helping people be less afraid of death. By arranging for them to provide their loved ones with a planned and funded funeral or memorial service, together we create a path for bereavement, long before it’s needed. And by facing their mortality, my clients can live better, more meaningful lives.
A seasoned speaker, I bring deep experience in death care to a broad range of audiences around the country, sharing insights and approaches on how to have those difficult conversations and how to address sensitive issues. Extending well beyond death and dying, my message resonates across industries and individuals, bridging my passion to demystify death while enlightening communicators on overcoming challenging conversations.
What do you think helped you build your reputation within your market?
I practice radical authenticity! I’m transparent about my process and offerings. If my funeral home is not the right fit for a prospect, I say so! I help
people get only what they need and will value.
Can you share a story from your journey that illustrates your resilience?
I’ve always been really good at talking about the hard stuff. I was an AIDS educator in college. I was a peer counselor. When my friends were worried about being pregnant or having an STD, they turned to me for help. When my lifelong friend, Michele, was diagnosed with a glioblastoma, a brain tumor, when we twenty-six. I realized that my comfort in talking about hard stuff was pretty unusual.
At that time, a glioblastoma was always terminal. But it was really difficult for everyone to acknowledge that with Michele. They would give her pep talks telling her that she was young and strong and promising that she would beat the disease. I handled it very differently. I said, I can go with you into the hard stuff. I don’t have to tell you everything is going to be ok. And you don’t have to tell me everything is going to be ok. We both know it’s not going to be ok. When she died, I was grateful that we had those conversations. They brought us much closer, and they helped to accept her death with fewer regrets. That experience put me on this path.
Contact Info:
- Website: www.feldmanmemorial.com
- Linkedin: https://www.linkedin.com/in/jamie-sarche/
- Youtube: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SmsYxDvdcYc
- Other: https://www.myjewishlearning.com/eli-talks/death-rituals-creating-jewish-life/ https://www.bizjournals.com/denver/c/dbj-2021-outstanding-women-in-business/15268/jamie-sarche.html
- If you are interested in discussing funeral/memorial service plans, please contact me at [email protected] or 303-322-7764.
- To learn more about Talking Before the Mourning, contact me [email protected] or 303-322-7764.