We recently connected with Ilona Seddik and have shared our conversation below.

Hi Ilona, thanks for joining us today. Let’s kick things off with your mission – what is it and what’s the story behind why it’s your mission?

It’s all about transformation. You have heard many breathtaking stories about overcoming trauma, releasing problems, and stepping into your true self. And some of you might think, “Oh, it’s not for me. I’m not that brave. I’m just trying to live my life decently”. I do get the feeling. I thought absolutely the same only a few years ago. I was raised near the Arctic Pole, and being someone great and strong was not my plan. I was surviving. Kids at school called me “fat pig”; a teacher called it “their games.” I was surrounded by cold and -53 F weather. My parents didn’t have enough money, so I ate canned food and was on a “no fruits” diet.

I entered university, where I was a “strange girl from the village.” I thought I had found the love of my life, and it turned out to be a nearly-death experience of domestic violence. All this time, I was convinced that I was a fat village girl who deserved to be treated as the second sort of a human being. Until the moment I met Anna. Over the phone, she begged me to help her. I worked as a lawyer at that time and guessed that it was some tax issues or contract-related problems. I was hesitating but said, “Yes.” We agreed to see each other in the café. She was late, and I was so frustrated that I was going to leave. I remember looking out the window at the annoying rain outside.

I felt her coming inside the café. I turned around. I didn’t recognize her; she wore sunglasses and a heavy black rain jacket, but I was sure it was Anna. She carefully reached my table and sat down. I tried to start a conversation, but she didn’t reply. She sat still for a moment and then took off her glasses. When in the movies you see victims of horrific crimes, you could never believe that in real life, it’s much more scary. I felt nauseous. Her entire face was smashed and looked like a bruise. I couldn’t see her eyes, and she showed with her finger that talking was painful. She just stared at me and silently cried. Tiers just came out from her eyes. She looked straight at me for a couple of minutes. My world held still. Noise from the kitchen, people laughing, and rain outside – all these didn’t matter. I saw evil in action. Her boyfriend beat her up for one hour. She lay down in her own blood for a while until she regained consciousness. I remembered how I saw myself in her. “I’ll be the next if I don’t do anything.” It was my wake-up call. I started my long healing path.

After I moved to the USA 5 years ago, I understood that Anna saved my life and gave me a deeper meaning. I could turn my pain into helpful work for others, so I work with entrepreneurs, coaches, and service-based businesses that can help others. I help influencers, and passionate content creators create awesome content that allows them to connect with others and support them. Social media is the place where we can help each other. And to make it more effective. To connect with the right people, you need to create content.

Ilona, before we move on to more of these sorts of questions, can you take some time to bring our readers up to speed on you and what you do?

I moved to the US five ago. At the time, I had no idea that I would not be able to see my parents for the next five years, although I would see my kids showing incredible strength. I had no idea I would be forced to rethink and reevaluate my core personality and build it anew, only to find my place in this gorgeous country. And finally, I would be blessed to find my community only when I open my heart unconditionally. Spoiler: it was the hardest part.

I remember the day I moved as if it were yesterday. It was a sunny day; the air was fresh, and the sleepy nature of February met me. I was in love with
the wide streets, smiling people, and generous portions of food in the restaurants. As a young girl raised near the Arctic Circle, I have been used to this time of winter being far more brutal. February here was rather gentle—more like spring in my hometown (village, actually). Everything was so new and bright, and starting a new life was so exciting. We moved to northern Virginia, so the first destination we visited was Washington, D.C. I had only seen the National Mall in movies before, and to be there in person was like landing on the moon. I stood there in front of the Lincoln Memorial and cried. The huge statue of the strong leader was right before me and was much more breathtaking than on TV.

I kept saying to myself, “You’ve made it, Ilona! At school, you were fat and miserable. Remember how they yelled at you, and if you cried, they called you pathetic?” I felt tears running down my cheeks. “At the university, you were a nerd. They made fun of you and your looks; yup, poverty doesn’t make you look pretty. Oh, and at work, well, colleagues just called you ‘this one’ or a ‘blondie girl.’ They want to see you get married and leave work for a family.”

We left the memorial and headed toward the Washington Monument. I felt a chill wind on my face. Once, a man told me, “Pray before you die! I said pray; this is the last moment of your life.” These words are no longer in my life. I felt a bit cold and hugged my husband. We stood in front of the powerful monument, our kids playing nearby. This was the brightest moment of my life. They say that you would never see the light without the dark. But they forget to mention that being on the dark side is a very painful thing. I was sure that those dark days of my life were so far in the past that they could never be reached again.

Well, I was wrong. Finding my place in this gorgeous country was a long and difficult process. I felt I must do something more. I got a chance to start from scratch. I had no power, no money, no business, and nobody knew me. I was just a mom. The only thing I had was my story and a BA in the Russian language that
gave me the power to write. I decided to write a fantasy novel because this genre could help me reach the greatest number of readers. I had no clue how to make that happen, but this was the only thing I could do. I opened my heart without any guarantee, but for me to keep silent meant being a part of the evil (violence).

Three months later, I finished my first manuscript, and five months later, I held Cahokia in my hands. It was an emotionally difficult period in my life. I would be lying if I said the opposite; any difficult story requires courage, mastery, and commitment to tell. This book helped hundreds of women realize that they are normal and that for someone to hurt them is wrong. They could finally feel safe and accepted. I learned everything about social media through books, courses, and coaching programs. My marketing strategy led to the book becoming a bestseller very soon.

Besides my BA degree, I’m a lawyer with fifteen years of practice in Russia. So, I can easily build a system and analyze information, and I heard so many people’s stories (not the happiest ones, unfortunately). Plus, my scientific experience and Ph.D. in Russian law have helped me to be consistent and precise in my writing. Also, my past as a survivor of domestic violence makes me an attentive and compassionate listener who can see one step deeper in you.

But my true passion I found through my client. One comment on my Instagram account, @ilonaseddik, confused me. Tanya wrote, “You are so blessed that you could do it. I want to tell someone about myself and my business. I’ve been wanting to tell my story for so long. Lucky you are!” I felt as if a goose had walked over
my grave. I had taken my gift for granted. I grabbed it for myself, but it was given to me for the people. And that was clearly being shown to me. I answered Tanya, “I could help you in your journey. Please DM me.” When I started working with Tanya, she told me immediately, “I cannot sell anything. I feel so confused. I cannot find clients.” “So, let’s don’t sell anything. Instead, we will tell your story. Why did you become an entrepreneur? Why did you decide to help people? Why does
your program help women? Why do you keep trying?” I asked. And she started to talk. Within a few weeks, she had a group of people who were blessed to work with her. I looked at her smiling eyes when she told me the good news, and I understood, “If I help entrepreneurs, coaches, and service providers to talk about themselves, build solid content systems that save their time and give proven results on their bank account, they will help so many women around the US and worldwide.” Yes, it’s as simple as that!

Now, I can handle your social media and build an effective system of authentic content to drive results on your bank account. Your voice, your brand, and your socials are elevated. It is not about scheduling posts or creating videos. I can connect all your social media with your email marking and website in a cohesive system that drives sales because it’s the only way to succeed in the modern social media world. The second essential element of my work is authenticity—your authenticity. I don’t need staged content or special events to create profitable video and photo content. I’m happy to come to you to shoot your work and yourself as you are. I convert these shots into videos so your audience can see and love who you are and your business. You don’t need to do everything by yourself.
I’m here.

What’s a lesson you had to unlearn and what’s the backstory?

I was married at the age of 24. He was a good guy until the moment he wasn’t. To live separate lives in one marriage was not going to be my story. We divorced after two years together, including six months married. We had no children, but we had a joint property and the mortgage that helped us get it. And he walked away; I stayed and paid the bank. Initially, the bank had calculated the monthly payment based on the joint income. There I was
without the other income. My salary as a successful lawyer in one of the biggest corporations in Russia was enough for this. Plus, necessary food, transportation, and utility bills. That’s it! Oh, hold on. I bought one shirt per two months because it was a big corporation and to keep my job I had to look “presentable.”

The office was downtown. It was the place where you could buy, eat, and watch everything. The most beautiful, exciting things were there. People worked hard and played hard, and these people had money. And imagine me with no money in such a place. I could afford plain spaghetti or salad for lunch. Cash for transportation was carefully calculated per trip; I had no car. So weekends were devoted to a flat-screened buddy called TV. At least I could pay for electricity.

If I felt sorry for myself, I would try to argue my way out of it. I was poor and in need in my childhood—like most people in our town. I didn’t eat fruit and vegetables till the age of nine or ten, and canned food was routine for us. And we were used to it. Of course, there were girls and boys living a much better life, but I was generally like the rest. And I was a child. Back to being a divorced professional woman in a big city, I was the only one surrounded by fancy restaurants, expensive things, and colleagues who traveled to the Maldives and hated it because their porridge was served cold. I couldn’t even afford porridge for breakfast sometimes.

And nobody knew about my situation. I was divorced, so I had failed in life. Moreover, I was twenty-five years old, working in such a good place yet so miserable. “What’s wrong with you? Shame on you, Ilona.” This is a nugget from the pep talks with myself during that time. To ask for help meant to be weak. I kept it to myself, and it was easy to hide. My lack of food I explained as a new diet. A woman is usually encouraged to be thinner aka more attractive. I refused to attend weekend parties among colleagues because I needed money to go to work; weekend fun meant extra trips. I explained that I needed to work more on weekends to keep up at the office. A woman usually needs to work harder and more than a man for the same salary. I dealt with it as a family matter. I survived. But honestly, I was a single young woman in her 20s. I wanted to live. I decided to do one thing I’m not proud of, but I think it is worth sharing here.

Twice I dated men just because I wanted to eat. I was not paying back with intimate services or anything—just a date at the restaurant where my meal was paid for—no strings attached. You may laugh, but I clearly remember the taste of that steak and Caesar salad on one of those dates. I was so happy to have it but didn’t show too much enthusiasm for the food. I acted like everybody else at the restaurant. I had been looking through windows at people eating their dinners in gorgeous places for a while, so it wasn’t hard to imitate them. To keep it to myself was much more crucial. Because I wasn’t normal. I wasn’t enough; I had ruined my life, and that had consequences. And I was sure that it was on me. Until that moment, it was the best time of my life.

The second date was with my future husband. When I thought I didn’t deserve to be happy anymore, I met the person who saw me. I mean really saw me, not just my body, hair, smile, or any other thing about me. He saw me as a whole personality. He was the first to know about my shame of divorce and hunger and didn’t
blame me. There was nothing to be ashamed of in his opinion. Eventually, the mortgage was paid with the help of my parents, and I could move on with my life. But this story taught me two things. The first one is don’t take a mortgage as a newly married couple (ha-ha-ha). The second one is that guilt and shame are a prison in your head. It helped your parents, partners, friends, etc., to control your behavior. They pointed their finger at something and said (at least my grandmother did), “Shame on you! Good girls don’t act like you; you are too loud and messy. Don’t ever do this again. Otherwise, you will end up like your mother or those nasty women. Deal with it!” And you stopped. You buried the part of yourself that was not comfortable for others. You cut out that “dirty, ugly” piece of yourself. Here’s the truth: You can be anything and everything you wish. You are ok.

Can you tell us about what’s worked well for you in terms of growing your clientele?

It was social media. To make it more effective and connect with the right people, you need to create content.
And preferably short-form video. Data showed that this type of content reaches more people and is welcomed by all generations.

We love quick injections of dopamine from 7-second videos. We scroll and try to get more.
Our brain is just wired like this.

You can use three tips right now to make your short-form video more successful. By doing so, you can reach more people and get more views and likes that you can turn into sales later.

1. Every video piece should be on brand.

Niche oriented. It’s not just me walking on the beach, eating at a fancy restaurant, or cute video of your dog or cat.
Use the formula: I show how I help others in every Reel, Short, or TikTok.
It can be direct advice or support and compassion.

2. Create a system.

Imagine an orange. When you take it, it’s just one piece. But to enjoy it, you need to pill it so you can find juicy, sweet pieces.
Treat your content the same way.
From 1 Reel, you can create up to 13 pieces of content.
Make every video work for you to the fullest. This is possible even if you are alone in your team.
The content system between all social media platforms is crucial for the safety of your business, motivation, and attraction of more people to your brand.

3. Make it fun

Serve, provoke interest, and then sell. They come to you by themselves. You don’t even need to suggest anything.
Social media is a place where people want to have fun and enjoy themselves. They come there when they are bored or feel lonely and frustrated.

Ask yourself before posting: is this video interesting and comfortable to watch?

You should check trends in audio, creative visuals, good light, a smooth pace (not too fast, not too slow), and interesting shots.

Create awesome videos and be visible to the world.

Because we need your wisdom, love, and support.

You are incredible, remember.

Contact Info:

• Website: https://ilonaseddik.myflodesk.com/services
• Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/ilonaseddik/
• Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/ilona.seddik
• Linkedin: https://www.linkedin.com/in/ilona-seddik-069011203/
• Youtube: https://www.youtube.com/@ilonaseddik/
• Other: TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@ilonaseddik
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