We recently connected with Heather Abbasi and have shared our conversation below.

Hi Heather, thanks for joining us today. How did you learn to do what you do? Knowing what you know now, what could you have done to speed up your learning process? What skills do you think were most essential? What obstacles stood in the way of learning more?

I learned to model in a lot of little ways throughout my life starting at about 5 years old. At first it was playing dress-up and dancing, memorizing my favorite songs and acting out my favorite parts in movies. Then, it was taking the time to read a lot of magazines. I would try to imitate poses, facial expressions and, more. When I got old enough, I tried to imitate the make-up looks on myself. I got a lot of ideas from commercials about how to walk and carry myself. Once I made it to college for music, I got back into modeling by doing a favor as a vintage style model for a friend’s online boutique. I was surprised she wanted me as her model given my size but she insisted. It turned out really well so, I sought out more information about doing this professionally. I thought it couldn’t hurt my résumé as a singer/songwriter. This turned into a lot of google searches, scouring magazines, asking my peers for advice or, guidance and, more. My singing professors were very supportive and, were happy to see me making those advances. They enjoyed that I was taking my future career seriously. There were of course, the haters and, the doubters. I wanted to be honest with myself since my size was not viewed as a positive, even in the sense of being a recording artist. I couldn’t help but wonder, “Why not go for it?” I already took a huge risk by quitting my job to go to school full-time. What could I really lose by becoming a model as well? I spent a lot of time online figuring out different social media page requirements to represent certain brands toward the end of my time in school. It wasn’t until I had a seizure brought on by trauma and stress, and then took subsequent medical leave to heal from a lifetime of narcissistic abuse that led me here. I couldn’t sing for awhile because of the seizure, so I decided to try modeling once more. I could barely speak, had zero energy to do basic things, short-term memory loss, crying almost all the time and, was further depressed because all my life, my only goal was to be a recording artist. I felt like that was all ripped away from me. I was diagnosed as disabled by my Dr. at the time and had to learn to live a life I never wanted for myself as a homemaker in a small apartment in downtown Los Angeles. I am so fortunate I had my husband, Andrew for support but I felt so low because I didn’t want to burden him with being the sole financial provider. We moved to Arizona to start over, manage better and, begin my recovery.

As I began healing and settling into my new roles, I looked into modeling for small brands through social media. My thought was that I could at least get free clothes when I needed them through these opportunities while I build my portfolio. Modeling became very therapeutic to me because I felt that my brain could heal yet, I could still live out my calling as an artist. It was a gift of expressing myself through movement and, fashion. All the while dreaming of the day I could speak and, sing again without difficulty. It became even more therapeutic once I saw how awesome it was making other plus-size women feel about themselves. Getting the occasional freebie or payment became the bonus. From there, these benefits were the fuel and, everything else was a rewarding rinse and, repeat process until I signed up for a model coaching program in 2021. That opened my eyes to the best way to go about getting what I wanted out of my career while enhancing the use of my platform for my favorite causes. I believe all of this really helped heal me and give me my life back but, better.

Knowing what I know now, I would not have held on to working so hard for brands that weren’t keeping their promises and, gave me advice that hindered my growth or, potential. I gave a lot to brands in loyalty and trust. I believed in them because they seemed like the type of company I wanted to work for. I went for them because they aligned with my principles and, found myself taken advantage of once or twice. I enjoy working with brands that are uplifting, inclusive and charitable. Although I helped facilitate all of these wonderful things while earning some occasional payment, I was working really hard for companies that did not believe in me or, if they did, there were a lot of empty promises, dead ends and, walls built up in my way to greater things. I would have done things a lot differently. I would have signed up for them all the same because, no matter what, I learned from the experience. What I would do differently is let go of brands and move on when I no longer see my value is being honored or that their promises aren’t going anywhere. It’s hard to navigate that because a lot of things can seem really great and work out and some other things only seem great for a short while and others just wasted your time or, took you back a few steps.

A lot of obstacles in my way of learning more was honestly, poor guidance from peers, certain brands and other supposed supportive parties alike all while saving finances to invest in myself sooner. What a lot of people don’t realize is that, although you should do your best with what you have, modeling can be very expensive in a lot of little ways, especially when getting started. There’s only so much you can do with your own capabilities, time, money, resources of other kinds, and finding the right information on your own. If you really want to have a chance at success, you need to invest in your own education and follow the guidance of those who care, when and if you can find them. The same is true for all things in life we all want. You will hit a ceiling when your own resources, energy and know-how run out. Being open to learning and changing is the biggest thing you can do for yourself.

Resilience, learning, staying coachable, and the ability to quickly pivot in a different direction when the tides have turned away from your favor. These are the things I have found to be most essential. There is always more to learn and a different direction to go, especially when things don’t turn out for the better or the way you expected. There are also a lot of societal factors that work against you such as, people placing labels on you based on the box they are living in. For example, I am a plus-size woman and perfect strangers will go out of their way to tell me, without solicitation, all kinds of things they think about me like, what they think my worth is, what they think I can and can’t do because in their minds, they wouldn’t look at me if they didn’t have to or, thought I would be hot if I weren’t fat.

Heather, before we move on to more of these sorts of questions, can you take some time to bring our readers up to speed on you and what you do?

As a model, digital creator and, influencer I do my best to bring to life the vision of a brand or, other artists that best represents their mission while sharpening my skills to best embody that vision. I do all this while creating something that makes the brand or magazine stand out. In addition I make myself more marketable. It’s my job to create what I was asked to do with my own personal flare. What makes me stand out makes the client stand out. What sets me apart from others is my passion to get the job done in the most elegant way I can. I don’t want to just bring the vision to life, I want to make it as alive and grand as possible. Not only for my own satisfaction in my work but, because I was honored to be chosen out of so many others to do this for someone else’s dream. There is a reason I got chosen and, I want to prove that I was the best choice because they thought so of me, first. I’m most proud of that and, all the work I have done to make women feel included, seen and most of all, uniquely beautiful. Also, to have brought clean, cruelty-free and plant-based beauty products to a more mainstream audience. I think it’s important to live with less waste and, harsh chemicals while trying to make life better for our animal friends and, our mutual home, earth. What we put on our bodies is as important as what we put in to me and, that resonates with everything I do. We can all benefit from safer products used in our daily lives and often, they can be the most effective and nurturing for us.

One of the biggest things I want known about me is that, I wouldn’t agree to work with a brand / magazine / label that I didn’t believe in for one reason or another. I prefer to work with those who have inclusive sizing for all bodies or abilities and charitable ideals and, deliver on their promises. Especially those that support abuse survivors, animals, mental health, women’s empowerment, environmental safety, lgbtq communities and, other positive social changes. I also like brands that take pride in craftsmanship, sustainability, high quality items, timeless motifs made to last a lifetime while looking fabulous with almost anything. I believe if we are going to pay for something, it should be something worth the investment. Fashion is something that expresses your most authentic self. When you find something that you love, you should only have to pay for it once because in 20 years, it will still be relevant, glamorous style that is all your own. It’s fun to get new things sometimes but not when you have to keep buying the same thing yet, keep finding disappointment when you can’t regularly wear your favorite stuff for fear of degradation. That’s a waste of money, time and, energy. I would hate for a follower or friend alike to have made a purchase from a brand I model to support me while getting themselves something special that they worked hard for and, deserve, just to disappoint them when they receive their merchandise. That not only breaks my heart, it makes me upset with myself because I wouldn’t want that to happen to me. I take it personally because I was the one who advertised them. I feel responsible because I should have done better to research who I was working with and, what they really deliver to people that value my taste, opinions or fashion choices. Who I align with matters the most to me because my supporters’ expectations matter. In a world where there are scams everywhere, the last thing I want is to aid that experience. If you buy something, you should get what you were advertised.

Is there a particular goal or mission driving your creative journey?

I don’t have just one mission or goal driving my creative journey and, I think that is why I have gotten as far as I have with as many setbacks as I have had. My most important goal is to make my late mother proud of me. She was my first, biggest and, almost only supporter for the longest time. No one else inspired, encouraged me or, took me seriously like she did. When no one had faith in my abilities, where other family members would ignore and, dismiss my aspirations or, tell me they didn’t think I was serious, she reminded me who I was. This enabled me to do what made me happiest. My second and, most important driving goal is to simply leave the world a better place than I found it in any way I can. As far as humanity has progressed, there is always more to be done for positive impacts we can have. I try my hardest to live my life in a way that brightens the future a little more and, have that reflect on my work. My third most important goal is to prove the naysayers have no idea what they’re talking about. Anyone with an opinion can come along and, tell you what your limits are based on their narrow view. It’s up to each of us to decide who we are, what we want, then, to make moves supporting those decisions. We deserve to give ourselves what make us happiest. Only you get to decide how far you can go to have your dreams become your reality. We must make our own choices and, live with them. I’m choosing to have a life well lived, on my terms, having as much fun as possible, while hopefully, making a difference along the way. Integrity is very important to me and, is my driving mission overall. That is a rare quality that makes me a more valuable asset in this modern world. I think it’s important to be trustworthy. Through my personal integrity, I hope to encourage more from others, especially from the industry. Why would you feel good trusting me if I wasn’t transparent about working with a brand, especially if the brand wasn’t so transparent with you either? A lot of companies, real or fake and, models are out for their own interests and, paychecks. Anyone can get your attention with something you like then, take your money. Not everyone gives what they promise or advertise. Some have a lot of fine print or extra hoops to jump through to get to the promised item or, service. Some just take your money and, you never see a product. Some only advertise to a certain body size, financial status or, group of people. Some just don’t care as long as you buy what they are selling. I like to make it clear that when I am showcasing a product or, I’m wearing it, a follower with my same size at home will be able to buy what I’m wearing because it’s affordable, quality and, it will fit because it’s available in their size.

Likewise, if I am showcasing a beauty item, it is usually one or a happy combination of; 100% plant-based, cruelty-free, good for sensitive skin, as well as effective. There is also a good chance that it supports a great cause, small business or, cleans up the environment if I am wearing or, modeling a product. I think that mindset should be more present when expecting loyalty from consumers. As a model, I depend on people making purchases based off my work, modeling a product. I think more models and businesses alike should want to send the right message in these ways. I know a simple celebrity endorsement of a product can make a world of difference when making a decision to buy something. It can be a very good thing for all parties involved. It also can be as simple as a celebrity looking to get a paycheck. Wouldn’t you like it just as much if you knew they actually wore those products, took those supplements or, thought of your other personal needs before taking the job? Would you trust them to have your best interests and, budget at heart? Would you prefer to support your friend that you know uses these products and, you know it worked for them? That’s who I want to be when I ask people to try what I’m modeling. People work so hard yet, often can’t make ends meet. They still deserve nice things, especially given how much they went through to earn their paychecks. I want to be on their side. As much as earning my living is important to me, I won’t be able to sustain it if people that value my fashionable opinions and, actions see my actions going against my supposed principles. More things in life should be that upfront and, direct. I definitely love modeling, creating and, influencing for the creativity of it. I sure would love it if it came with a guaranteed paycheck every single time, too. Sometimes, I do accept things for the financial benefit and, am just as guilty as anyone else that wants to get paid for their hard work. It’s a very rare circumstance because often when I do accept these types of gigs, there is still something I think I am representing that will benefit my audience. I believe more benefits should come out of what I do than just for my own gain. I want to model but more than that, I want to be respected as a human being. I want to benefit those who choose to support me or, make financial choices based on my opinion, choices or work. Influencing for the better, not just for personal gain.

We’d love to hear the story of how you built up your social media audience?

Building my social audience was and still is the most difficult thing I do for my career. It sounds easy enough Just post about yourself in a nice outfit, right? Unfortunately not. It takes a lot of time, patience, willingness to be rejected, researching, contacting, asking questions, adding to your résumé, creating / updating your social profiles and, other sites / links to match your goals, redirecting and, reinventing yourself, interviews, etc. I started building my social presence about 6 years ago when I was fresh in my healing process, gaining followers on the main platforms. I joined these outlets, watched a lot of videos and, looked up tutorials for success on each platform. I monitored my favorite accounts, saw how each platform was best used to my advantage, starting with the right profile category ( I chose the creator / artist but, it can change or be different pending what you want to do with it ). I drank in the way other people created and posted their videos. I observed the way they ran their accounts, noting a lot of new ideas to start posting about myself. I observed a lot of my favorites closest of all. I looked at their backgrounds, lighting, driving motives and, in general, the way they branded themselves. A few of them followed me back. I kept repeating this process for about 6 months. I even looked into programs to sign up for free or, pay a small, one-time fee to get linked with brands. This will then create a special link for brands to see the work you have done previously and, hire you. The one I chose is on my Instagram in my bio and it’s called, Verified Model. If you click on my link there, go to my model page, click on the 3 vertical dots in the right hand corner, you can click the sign up button, pay the one-time fee and, create your personal model account. Now, you have a great reference from yours truly! This will get you more paying brand deals and, gigs. All while making you look professional and savvy. You can use this as a portfolio, point of contact, résumé, as well as an extra hand, working to bring new gigs to you. It’s great to have while you build other things, too. For example: your site, portfolio, comp card, etc. All you have to do is post your previous work.

By the time I began posting online, I shared video recordings of myself, singing what I could given I still had heavy speech problems and. short-term memory loss. At the same time, I looked into several brands that needed models through these social outlets and, various internet searches. I aimed for what I could do given my size, inexperience and, speech / memory issues that were still severe at this time. I chose companies such as, Sand Cloud, Juicy Body Goddess, Phat Barbies and, more. I chose Sand Cloud because they had low-waste, beach ready, eco-friendly, products with a mission to “save the fishies.” They’re a brand that wasn’t just clothes but, useful lifestyle tools that we should all be more aware of. I chose Juicy Body Goddess and Phat Barbies because they were sassy, boutique couture clothing made specifically for plus-size bodies with an aim to empower plus-size women and, highlight what is beautiful about them. A few years later, I signed up with, The Henna Guys for clean, effective, plant-based hair and, skincare. I still use their products, especially deep red or wine red henna hair dye. I will remain a loyal customer and, ambassador for them because they’re products really do work. Doing this the way I did gained me more followers slowly but, steadily. I got a lot of learning material from these different brands that taught me to be an even more effective brand ambassador. I learned something new with each additional project. My follower count grew the more I followed the guidelines I was given and, the more I posted. For example: posting at the right times of day, multiple times of day on select days of the week, changing to making reels instead of posting pictures or videos, choosing the right captions, etc. There were slightly different requirements then.

The largest following I had at the time, before my IG account, @heatherabbasi.mermaidmelodies was hacked, was about 2 or 3 thousand if I recall correctly. Since then, I have learned a lot more, started a new account, signed up for mentorship and, changed the direction I was going about modeling, influencing and, creating. That’s when I sought a deeper impact with my account mostly, trying to normalize what should be the norm. For example; women’s body shapes / sizes, women’s empowerment and, removing limits / labels we put on ourselves, just to name a few. Making sure my account isn’t just highlights of my life will always be very important to me. I want my accounts to be positive and upbeat while showcasing my talent to potential employers. At the same time, I also don’t want to hide what makes me real, raw and, aware that the way we view beauty and, ourselves need a fresh perspective. I want to be inspirational, empowering, inclusive, accepting, understanding and, inviting without judgement or oversharing what is truly special to me and, therefore, private. My Instagram only has about 5oo followers right now and I am grateful to have them. There is always more to learn the longer I do this. Before I take on any new task, I research the brand. If that brand didn’t approach me first but I would like to take part in their campaign, I look into their mission statements, reviews and, check every part of their site before I fact check further through more browser searches. If I like what I see, I apply. Some come with simple applications on their site, some come with auditions, headshots and, body shots or some fun facts and, video introductions about you and, why you want to join their movement. I recommend copying and repeating these steps to anyone looking to do this for themselves. When you post about yourself, make sure it is something in your passion, niche, or on brand for your core mission. From there, keep at it. Surround yourself with very supportive, upbeat people that will be honest with you in addition to being supportive of you. More than that, remember to allow them to be honest with you. The right mentor or program when you hit a ceiling of information yet, would like to go farther is priceless if you are really serious about moving upward. They can help you with anything from mindset to freshening up your résumé and, so much more.

A lot of this is time and, money you must invest in yourself. It is so worth it. Especially if you also have your own website that you refresh regularly with your updated work. This is like having your digital portfolio on the internet. When potential employers are looking for models or brand reps, you look sharp in more than one way and, therefore, very hire worthy. It also really helps if you are always learning another skill. If they are relevant to your modeling career or just a hobby you love, it will not only enrich your life but it could enrich your marketability. That fun thing you love and, are good at could easily land you a unique gig where, otherwise a brand, agency, magazine, or audition might overlook you for someone else with a more unique skillset. Manage your time wisely and, do what you can when you can with what you have. The effort doesn’t go unnoticed. Giving up some free time to do this can be very worthwhile, even if you only want this to be a hobby. Most importantly, from personal experience, take good care of your wellness and, put yourself first. That includes mental health especially. You can’t drink from an empty cup. That being said, my biggest challenge is making the time, and energy to do everything I want to do yet still be the reliable person my family and, friends need me to be. (giggles)

Contact Info:

• Website: verifiedmodel.co/heatherabbasi
• Instagram: @heatherskyeabbasi
• Facebook: facebook.com/heatherabbasi.mermaidmelodies
• Linkedin: Heather Abbasi
• Youtube: Heather Abbasi

Image Credits
Andrew Abbasi