We caught up with the brilliant and insightful Gumslide (no pronouns) a few weeks ago and have shared our conversation below.

Gumslide, looking forward to hearing all of your stories today. What’s one of the most important lessons you learned in school?

This one is a bit of a bummer, but ultimately led to great revelations :)

I went to college in the mountains of NC for 2 fall semesters. I was going for Studio Art against the wishes of my family. I really loved the freedom, the environment, and the time to focus on my art. I was 18, and getting to live independently was something I was extremely unprepared for. My family kept me pretty sheltered and afraid of the outside world, something I’m still learning to unlearn.

I didn’t know how to spend time alone with myself. I had pretty bad mental health issues, and finding meds that worked for me was a huge challenge for a while (I was chronically ill without being aware of it, and I am uniquely sensitive to pretty much any medication, I’ve learnt since). The friends I surrounded myself with were also struggling pretty bad, and as one of the two POC in that group of 6-8 regulars, it was a very Othering situation that had a huge impact on my self esteem. The college I went to was in a very de facto segregated town as well, and the other POC I met seemed likewise pretty uncomfortable in that area for various (or maybe the same) reasons.

By 3 months into the fall semester, I took a psychological withdrawal, I think it was called. I basically met with a bunch of administrative staff, said I needed to drop out because of severe depression, and they guided me very kindly to my best, least-impactful-of-my-GPA, option. I moved back to my hometown, and was very mentally unstable for the next year. On a whim, I decided to go back to college for one more try. Looking back, I was clinging to anything that put distance between myself and my family. But still too afraid to lose what I considered my only protection from the horror movie of life that was drilled into my head from birth til I cut contact with them (around 22-23 years old).

This is a lesson that took me a few years (including one year of being homeless) to really fully grasp, but I consider college to be the triggering event that led me to realise that I am my own biggest support, and honestly that none of that school shit matters for most people. I was thoroughly set up to fail in life by my upbringing, and I am overwhelmingly proud of myself that I found my way to where I am now: confident, caring, self-aware, basically a fucking delight of a human being. My friends and community adore me, and I give that same energy back as often as I’m able to. I feel comfortable being deeply myself around others for what feels like the first time in my life,

In terms of my artistic development, college was restrictive, harsh, and hostile to the ways I felt called to create and express myself. Since picking up arts and crafts again in the past 2 years, I have consistently been told that my art and expressions are inspiring, amazing, and well-developed. In college, I failed to grasp why an art project really mattered or had to be done a certain way, and my critiques usually focused on how I failed to meet the technical rubric versus any statement on the skills I loved to display. I also now realise that academia is, on its face, gatekeeping.

These skills can be learnt anywhere in life, and my lack of BFA has literally never ever mattered in my real actual life. Calling for someone to have a license of authority in a subject is useless if the only licenses handed out cost 50k and 4 years of the “classic” college suffering we’ve come to accept as normal. College is fun and great for some, but the pressure to attend or the stigma of being a “dropout” need to be dissolved. Our experiences are as important. if not more, than something we learn from a book or a slideshow.

POC have been living this truth since (and before) imperialism has existed, and for many of us, college is a pipe dream. Unaffordable. Inaccessible. Useless. Truly the lessons I learnt in school were that I don’t need a degree, I don’t need a badge of authority, I need a community. I need people around me who are committed to healing their pain in the same way I am to mine, and the ways we can show up for ourselves and each other become the most powerful experiences I’ve ever had the joy to experience.

Gumslide, love having you share your insights with us. Before we ask you more questions, maybe you can take a moment to introduce yourself to our readers who might have missed our earlier conversations?

Haha I think I covered a lot of this in another question, but I’ll summarise!

My name is GUMSLIDE (all caps intentional) or crow/cuervo, or any name someone feels is right for me and that I verify is okay with me. I don’t use pronouns, literally, so please refer to me only by my name. I’m 24, I live in NC, and I’m queer, trans, Latinx, and disabled.

I’m a lifelong crafter, I’ve always found a lot of joy in solving problems and trying to find the literal cheapest most accessible ways to do things. A lot of my interests were origami, reading, puzzles, and that nerdy type stuff as a kid. I also really enjoyed drawing, and I’ve had a rocky relationship with my sense of value as an artist honestly.

The past 2 years have been most of my more fulfilling journey. I started drawing as a way to spend time when I was homeless, living in a women’s shelter that was extremely restrictive and didn’t allow technology inside the building. I kept up the habit and started exploring local art shops and events during the day. The shelter didn’t allow us to be on the property from 6am to 5pm, so without a car, I had to find a way to fill up my time. I met some really cool people and I had literally never known about art markets until I started hearing about them during this time. I joined Instagram and continued to get exposure to the art community, and eventually I was able to start doing my own markets with the help and support of my art friends, some of whom were vendors themselves.

I don’t actually have a singular niche, I think, I mostly make very small and easy items to sell, and then as I fall out of love with older works or have an abundance from recent projects, I add those to my table as well. I love crochet, so there’s a lot of that. I also love printmaking, digital art, natural materials, and DIY, and those feature on my table a lot too. I like to think of my art as my relationship with myself and my world, so of course a lot of my work is utility oriented too, like produce bags, buttons, lighter holders, and just stuff I make for myself in my day to day life.

I’m Just Some Guy basically. I don’t really feel like my stuff is particularly set apart from other artists, I think it’s a matter of taste and personal experience that draws us to what we like in others, through their art. I think I have made a lot of space for my art as a lifestyle first, hustle second. I don’t judge my art based on how well others like it or how well it sells (I try not to anyways), and viewing my art through this lens is essential for me to continue feeling good about myself and my hobbies. It does have costs, and I hardly make profit from my markets, but I’m able to use my problem-solving skills to make my family’s life as comfortable as we can, and my partner is committed and excels at this too. We focus a lot on stress relief and trying to take things as unseriously as possible, and the support we afford each other has taught me a lot about care, community, and self respect. <3

What I want others to know about me is that I want them to take care of themselves as kindly as they can, and being able to take care of myself has given me a real appreciation for others doing the same. We’re doing our best all the time, and we are more equipped than we’re given credit for, I think.

How’d you meet your business partner?

Okay so this is the story of how I met my current partner, and it’s relevant because we technically have a co-founded zine distro named Loser Brigade! I say technically because we haven’t had time to really get into it thanks to economic stress. It’s something we’re both very excited to have the energy for next year.

I met Sam at a queer art club in Raleigh, NC. (I no longer endorse this club, nor the second club that formed, due to an abusive situation in the leadership group. Side note: being abused is heavily stigmatised and it’s normal to name abuse actually) I think Sam and I have had a pretty cartoonish relationship, and continue to do so. We felt connected literally upon eye contact. We were in the same conversational group during that meeting, exchanged numbers, and remained pretty out of contact for a month or so. I’m glad for it, as I was dealing with homelessness still, and I was unable to hold space for a vulnerable relationship right then.

We hung out a few times, and our hangouts felt so stress-free. I normally experience some pretty intense social anxiety, especially in a 1 on 1 hangout with a new person. However with Sam, I felt really comfortable right away, and so did she,

When I initially expressed romantic interest, they turned me down. She was right to, we’d only been friends for a couple months and she was also 6 years older than me. I was very cautious with even deciding to make my feelings known, I was deeply committed to strict age rules in my personal friendships and partners due to abuse from older men in past relationships. With the very helpful guidance from my therapist and continued positive experience with Sam, I was able to realise that our bond was very healthy, regardless of my past experiences.

We agreed to remain friends, and continued to hang out often and got to know each other really well. We found out over time that we worked really well together. We were able to share resources and chores really really intuitively, and we were both able to communicate our feelings when we were upset, which was crucial, both to our bond and our personal healing journeys. I think around month 4, we had a conversation about our dynamic. I think we were really connecting on a functional and emotional level, but our ethics about age gaps was a huge block. And I’m glad it was. I think we are a unique case in terms of the general health of age gap relationships.

Honestly, our relationship completely took us both by surprise. Neither of us was even open or looking for a partner. We talked about it, I decided to get my therapist’s outside perspective, and we decided to very cautiously enter a relationship together. Not much changed honestly, we were already spending long weekends together, cooking together, having conversations about ourselves and the world, and caring for her 2 cats together.

It was a lot growth from both of us. We both learnt how to communicate better, and are doing so all the time. We’ve been able to normalise so much together, like conflict, needing space, and body neutrality. I love living together and I love my space. We each have our own bedroom, and we both love it. We both equally care for our cats, and we are really really good at filling our mutual toolkit. They are able to run errands easily and cook, something I struggle to feel able enough for every day, and I love to make a budget and do work in our garden, which are tasks they struggle with getting done on their own.

We experience intense and realistic stress, especially this past summer, and the emotional and physical care we give to each other has made this current economic collapse much much much more bearable. I feel distinctly my own self, and Sam feels distinctly her own self as well. With this, we’re able to choose each other every time a conflict happens or a major stressor affects our ability to communicate. This sense of self is really important to a lifelong bond, I think, and having the space to choose to walk away makes it much more meaningful that we choose to walk together.

We often hear about learning lessons – but just as important is unlearning lessons. Have you ever had to unlearn a lesson?

In art, something I chose to unlearn was that there’s “good” art. It was instrumental in finding the security and pride in my crafts that I now enjoy.

This is mostly unplugging from my technology and giving myself space to have my own ideas. I log onto Instagram about once every few days, at my most ideal mood. Sometimes it’s once every 2 weeks if I’m very busy, sometimes it’s multiple times a day if I’m struggling with a lot of insecurity and boredom daily.

Ultimately, the way I see art is as a reflection of the person who made it, rather than something to be consumed. I think this has allowed me to stop ranking art, because it’s really just based on personal taste. There’s no one true “good” art, but there ARE a bunch of charlatans who will try to convince you that there is, and that if you buy their degree or teachings or brush packs or whatever-the-fucks, that you will enjoy fame and fortune and self-love. In my experience, self love is more about saying no to cheap or rude clients, staying home to rest instead of going to that market, and dropping out of college.

I don’t make art to show other people. I can’t, Something I make to appease some mysterious AI algorithm to show my friends and fans for exposure and MAYBE money or paid work….. It’s not sustainable, to say the least. It killed my art drive and it’s boring and miserable for me. People who are online constantly and always look Tiktok-ready are irl freaks in my experience, and in a kind of scary way.

I don’t make content, and something I hear all the time is how hard, how boring, how unfulfilling brandwork and marketing is. How confusing it is to keep up with an Instagram, a Tiktok, a Youtube, a Patreon, a Ko-Fi, and like the list goes on. Online artists at large hate this race without a finish, and I want people to see how I’m able to live at a slow pace and maybe learn some ways they can find more space for themselves as well. This was probably one of my most essential lessons to unlearn, and my life is better in every way for it.

And it’s hard all the time!! Saying yes to myself frequently means saying no to more profit, more followers, higher prices, easier rewards, etc. I think I’m well-suited for this work tho, and hopefully the kids growing up today get to have it easier than I do. We all deserve a rest.

Contact Info:

• Instagram: www.instagram.com/gumslide
• Email – gumslide@proton.me