We recently connected with Elsa Arend and have shared our conversation below.

Elsa, thanks for joining us, excited to have you contributing your stories and insights. Before we talk about all of your success, let’s start with a story of failure. Can you open up about a time when you’ve failed?

I once led a large team and was the only woman sitting on leadership table – all the while having recently given birth to my first child and experiencing burnout was very challenging. I felt immense pressure all the time, at work and at home. I started to notice strange physical symptoms as the burnout progressed but I continued to push forward. At an event in NYC in front of hundreds of people, my voice stopped working on stage. It was one of the most embarrassing situations that has ever happened to me. I thought my career was over. My identity was shaken. I had no idea what would be next. It was scary and disorienting. This very public failure eventually led to me getting a health diagnosis that would shape my future. The burnout I was dealing with accelerated my symptoms and caused me to pause, reflect, make changes. I knew I had to make big big changes and I invested in myself by working with a coach. The work we did together changed my life and the trajectory of it. Now I have a mostly normal speaking voice and help other burned out professionals reverse their symptoms of burnout and lead from a place of confidence, health and authenticity.

Elsa, love having you share your insights with us. Before we ask you more questions, maybe you can take a moment to introduce yourself to our readers who might have missed our earlier conversations?

My story starts with success that nearly destroyed me unfortunately.

At 35, I was promoted to Executive Vice President at a marketing agency after quickly climbing the corporate ladder. I was leading an entire division, making great money, checking every box society told me mattered.

But my body was screaming. Anxiety attacks, insomnia, hair falling out, and a rare vocal cord condition called spasmodic dysphonia that made me sound like I was about to cry or like a broken record. Not exactly the executive presence you want in the C-suite.

I thought I could power through it. That’s what high-achieving women do, right? We ignore the warning signs, push past our limits, and prove our worth through productivity.

Until my body forced me to stop.

I took six months off, thinking rest would fix everything.

When I returned to work, I accepted a lower title and salary, convinced I was ready. But here’s what I didn’t understand then: burnout isn’t simply about overworking or over functioning too. What really drives burnout are the patterns that keep us trapped, like people pleasing, over giving , guilt, and a deep-rooted belief that our worth comes from what we produce.

After trying many things; therapy, massage, acupuncture, I hired my first coach, Cate Stillman, in 2016. Working with her didn’t just change my life; it saved it.

For the first time, I learned real self-care and gave myself permission to rest without guilt. I learned to confront the patterns of overworking and over functioning which was HARD and slow work. But I did it. And it changed me.

That experience lit something in me. I thought, “How can I become like her and give this gift to others?”

Today, I’m an ICF-credentialed Executive Leadership and Life Coach specializing in burnout recovery for high-achieving women.

For six years, I’ve been helping women break free from the same patterns that nearly broke me.

What I provide:
• 1:1 coaching programs (3-6 months) focused on pattern disruption, nervous system regulation, and building unshakeable confidence
• Intensive VIP days for deep breakthrough work
• Speaking on burnout, emotional intelligence, and healthy boundary setting

What sets me apart? I’ve been where my clients are. I know what it’s like to achieve everything you thought you wanted and still feel like you’re drowning.

I understand the unique challenges women face in leadership; the impossible standards, the constant pressure to prove ourselves, the way we sacrifice our health for everyone else’s approval.

I use trauma-informed coaching techniques to support nervous system regulation and deep-seated patterns that traditional approaches miss.

What I’m most proud of? Watching women reclaim their lives. Seeing a client go from crying in her car before work to leading with joy and confidence. Helping mothers show up differently for their families. Proving that you can be ambitious and at peace.

Here’s what I want you to know: Burnout isn’t fixed with bubble baths, vacations or time management apps. You must learn to work differently. You must recognize that your worth isn’t tied to productivity, that boundaries aren’t selfish, and that saying no is the most powerful yes you can give yourself.

If you’re successful on paper but exhausted in your soul, YOU’RE NOT BROKEN. You’re not alone. And there’s a way out that doesn’t require you to abandon your ambition or dim your light.

The woman who ignored every warning sign until her body forced her to stop? YUP THATS ME. And she’s now helping others listen to theirs before it’s too late.​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​

What’s a lesson you had to unlearn and what’s the backstory?

One of the lessons I had to unlearn is that in the past I used to think asking for help was weak. I actually built my personal identity around priding myself in not needing the help and support of others. I thought it made me stronger somehow. I went through a leadership training with Heart Core Leadership out in California and one of the big a-ha moments I had in becoming an entrepreneur is that I was carrying the identity of my corporate persona into coaching. That did not work. That former persona was a leader of leaders, self reliant, did not ask for help and over gave and over functioned constantly.

Now, having my own company, I quickly realized that I needed help. I had to do specific work to unravel the self reliant leader identify and find support in others. I had to ask for help. That was scary!

One of the greatest sources of support has come to me by way of getting very close with another coach I met in a training back in 2022. She and I are on similar coaching journeys and having her to run things by, get her perspective and ask for her help has been invaluable to me. I also consult with a group of other coaches to help guide my thinking and development of my business. I also work with my own coach who has mentally and strategically guided my business. I also have an assistant that works directly with me and has been a great source of support.

I now see asking for help as a superpower, not a weakness. It’s one of the big gifts I have been given on this journey of being a business owner.

Let’s talk about resilience next – do you have a story you can share with us?

In the coaching business, it’s easy to get a certification and understand more or less how to coach. The difficult parts are as follows: 1. Learning to navigate all of the complex feelings of fear and failure along the way 2. There are many coaches out there in the world with a focus on selling and scaling as fast as possible. While I understand we are all in the business to have profitable companies, the most successful coaches understand that they must master the craft of coaching and help their clients get real results in order to have a thriving business.

#1. I think the reason most entrepreneurs fail is because it is PAINFUL to be with fear and failure. And in the beginning of building a business, we feel these feelings regularly. Many of us are not taught how to have emotional intelligence or resiliency in the face of such extreme emotions. I am thankful that I was willing to do the work and hire a coach who would meet me every step of the way. I also met Steven Chandler (one of the godfathers of coaching) early in my coaching journey and when I asked him his #1 piece of advice for a new coach, he said “always have your own coach. If you can’t afford one, barter with other coaches until you can afford to have your own.” I have kept his advice and I am thankful for it. Coaches help us when our minds spin out and we want to give up. My coach STILL has to help me with this to this day! This has taught me resilience in the face of feeling very difficult and stressful emotions. I am thankful! Ask any entrepreneur and they will tell you the they have learned how to not only handle these emotions but master them. It is a skill.

#2 I get frustrated by how many “quickly scale, get lots of leads” messages I hear out there for coaches, especially new ones. While we want to build sustainable, thriving businesses, we must actually get good at coaching. The way to do that is through LOTS of reps (meaning coaching LOTS of people – often for free in the beginning), failure, course correcting, investing time in learning, having great mentors, etc. It takes years to build this. I also have the belief that slow and steady wins the race. I am not trying to zip to the top of this game quickly. I see my entrepreneurial career as a marathon, not a sprint. I hope to be doing this 20 years from now. I am proud that I built my business with classic sales strategies. I created a spreadsheet with great people I knew in my network, reached out to them over phone and text, connected with them 1:1 in meaningful conversations told them what I was up to with my coaching business and that is how I started to build this in 2019. I am grateful for this very simple business approach. It is only recently that I started to engage in social media. Getting in front of people in person, talking from a stage or in some type of networking opportunity is the best business opportunity always.

Contact Info:

• Website: https://elsaarendcoaching.com
• Instagram: @elsa.arend
• Linkedin: https://www.linkedin.com/in/elsa-arend-7576734/

Image Credits

First two images (headshot and image with hands on top of my head) Carissa Rogers Photography, LLC
Second set of images with me in jeans – Brittney Mundy Photography

All other photos were taken by a tripod I set up.