We were lucky to catch up with Ellie Hunja recently and have shared our conversation below.

Ellie, looking forward to hearing all of your stories today. What was one of the most important lessons you learned in school? Why did that lesson stick with you?

One of my greatest lessons in school – particularly in the transition from high school to college – was truly beginning to understand the value in each of our unique stories.

Like many of us, I spent much of high school agonizing over what people thought of me. I absolutely loved my high school experience – which I know is more than what many people can say – but the thought of truly leaning into my individuality seemed counter to a central goal in high school: fitting in. This was layered with the fact that I already stood out as a white person in a majority-Black high school.

When I got to college, my world truly expanded. I moved from the Detroit area to Georgetown University in Washington, DC. On campus, I met people from every walk of life: kids from working-class families like mine and kids who were steeped in generational wealth. Kids from every corner of the country and world. Kids whose parents had immigrated to the U.S. from all kinds of circumstances. I learned about the freedom struggle in Palestine from my first Palestinian friend, and heard the question “where do you summer?” for the first time. As my classmates described their family’s vacation homes in response, I quickly understood that “summering” looked a lot different from my gig as a summer camp counselor.

The culture shock was a challenge, but I quickly found close, accepting friendships. This gave me a secure base from which to embrace my own unique story and honor the stories of others, no matter how different to mine they may have looked.

I learned that not everyone thought like I did politically (which was probably the biggest culture shock, next to economic class!) I learned that there was no single way to embody a cultural identity, and that everyone is made up of a one-of-a-kind combination of traits and experiences that makes it impossible to place them in a box.

This lesson has informed my life and work ever since. It’s made me deeply curious, eager to understanding the lens and motivations of those around me. It’s caused me to make fewer assumptions and ask more questions. It led me to the field of clinical therapy, where I could begin to help others take ownership of their own stories and forge new paths.

And, in my writing, it reminds me that every aspect of who I am brings value to my work. I don’t need to separate my social justice values from the way I engage the topic of parenting. I don’t need to divorce my faith from the journey to embrace and affirm my son’s autistic identity. And I certainly don’t need to place each part of myself into a silo in order to be successful as a creative. I’d like to think that the way I embrace the fullness of my identities in my work encourages others to walk in that same freedom.

Ellie, before we move on to more of these sorts of questions, can you take some time to bring our readers up to speed on you and what you do?

I’m an author, and I actually have the pandemic to thank for pushing me to pursue writing. Like so many others, 2020 took a toll on my mental health. I was wrestling with the collective grief of COVID and racial injustice, the challenge of parenting without the usual external supports, and the isolation that we all experienced.

On top of all that, my son had just been diagnosed as autistic, and the early days of trying to understand what that meant felt all-consuming. With all of this burdening my heart, I found myself in a mental fog – until I realized that a hobby I loved could really help with that.

Before last year, writing wasn’t even a hobby – more like a (very) occasional creative outlet. I have a Master’s in Social Work, and I work in fundraising and communications for an incredible nonprofit. I’m also a wife and mom of three (ages 8, 4, and a brand new bundle of joy!) so life is definitely full. But I’ve always loved to write – I’m an external processor, whether that’s verbally or through writing – so getting my fingers on the keyboard pulls tangled thoughts out of my brain and helps me make sense of my world.

But once my academic career was over and I became a parent, my writing became limited to an occasional long Facebook post on a social issue or a reflective Instagram caption about parenting. Without fail, though, beloved friends would always comment on those sporadic pieces of writing with: “so when is your book coming out?!”

I’m so grateful to have always had family and friends in my life (and my husband most of all!) who never let me lose sight of my identity and passions, even in the hectic season of parenting young kids. Thanks to their encouragement over the years, I decided to start my own website in the spring of 2021 – EllieHunja.com – where I post reflections on parenting, mental health, social justice, faith, our journey in understanding autism, and whatever else is on my mind.

Instead of feeling pressure to “niche down,” I simply chose different online publications to submit my work to based on the subject matter so I wouldn’t feel limited. (I’ve been published on Thought Catalog, The Mighty, Her View From Home, Medium, and more.)

What sets my work apart, I hope, is the way it is both vulnerable and practical. With my background in mental health, I know how important it is to be honest about our emotions and the challenges we face instead of sweeping them under the rug and embracing “toxic positivity”. At the same time, I always want to make sure my readers are taking away some kind of practical encouragement – even if that’s simply just feeling seen and validated in their current experiences. So I try to strike a balance of realness and hope, especially when it comes to parenting topics. I truly believe we can be authentic and cling to the joys of this stage of life at the same time!

One of the things I’m proudest of on this journey is staying committed to something that brings me life, when it would be easier to get bogged down by my other obligations. One of my favorite quotes is by Howard Thurman: “Don’t ask yourself what the world needs. Ask yourself what makes you come alive, and go do that, because what the world needs is people who have come alive.” Writing excites and fulfills me in a unique way, and I’ve made the conscious decision to only choose projects that align with my passions. In less than two years, it’s already blossomed into something bigger than I could have imagined!

Any insights you can share with us about how you built up your social media presence?

Like many of us, I have a love-hate relationship with social media. It’s so fun as a creative outlet, but it can cause comparison and discontentment if I let it. That being said, the sense of community I’ve found – on Instagram, particularly [@elliehunja] – has been priceless on my creative journey!

I’m a people person, so genuine connection is at the heart of how I built my social media presence. At first, I fell into the trap of trying to court potential followers by dropping quick comments on as many similar accounts to mine as possible. But making real connections with people that I can truly call friends has been so much more fulfilling and fruitful, and energizes me to keep creating.

With my posts, my aim is to always be authentic to me – not to stress too much about what I think people want to see. With the kind of community I’ve built, and especially in the motherhood space, authenticity and vulnerability are high values. Of course, I believe in putting my best foot forward. I follow accounts that encourage and inspire me, and I look for ways to make my posts more inviting and shareable. But once I get too wrapped up in the superficial, I know I need to step back and recalibrate.

My writing started off as something “for me” – to help me slow down and reflect on my life and the world around me. When I stay in that lane, I find that it resonates with others who are also looking to lead genuine, reflective, intentional lives. My most “viral” posts [https://www.instagram.com/p/Cd9UeUfPeK-/] haven’t been the ones where I’ve tried to make my writing as broad and universal as possible. They’ve been the most deeply personal ones, specific to my experience in a way that allows others to enter in and relate in their own way. After all, those are the posts I resonate with most – honest windows into the beautifully unique experiences of those around me that tap into our shared human emotions.

If I could sum up my approach to social media, I’d simply say: it’s 2022, and life is too short to chase after someone else’s ideal, image, or aesthetic. If social media is starting to feel exhausting, it’s time to look inside and ask yourself, what do I really want to create? Trust that there’s an audience for whatever’s on your heart, because if it’s not giving you life and invigorating your soul in some way, then what’s the point?

What do you think is the goal or mission that drives your creative journey?

My ultimate goal as a writer is to help people feel seen, known, and empowered. I am a people-lover at heart, and all of my writing flows from that love. I hope to cultivate connection and build empathy with each topic I explore, making each of us feel a little less alone.

And specifically as a writer who’s also a mother, I feel driven to remind other moms that, even when we feel like we’re juggling all the things, we still deserve to embrace the fullness of who we are. We don’t have to “lose ourselves” in motherhood, succumbing to the pressure to tuck certain parts of ourselves away for a season. We can – and should – integrate all the gifts and passions God placed inside of us into our lives as moms.

And I want to set this example for my kids, too. I want to show them that leaning into all of who we were created to be brings a level of fulfillment and joy that seeps into the way we live, work, and parent – and it honors the one who created us.

I’ve been encouraged that as I focus on these goals, rather than specific metrics, opportunities seem to find me! In fact, my biggest writing opportunity yet (which I can’t wait to share more about in a few months!) came from a major publisher who found me via social media – despite my following being much smaller than other authors. This has served as confirmation for me that when I pursue authenticity and purpose on my writing journey, the growth that I desire will follow.

Contact Info:

• Website: www.elliehunja.com
• Instagram: instagram.com/elliehunja
• Facebook: facebook.com/EllieHunjaWriter

Image Credits
Michael Sanville Henry Keith