We recently connected with Dyani Eaton and have shared our conversation below.

Dyani, thanks for joining us, excited to have you contributing your stories and insights. Parents can play a significant role in affecting how our lives and careers turn out – and so we think it’s important to look back and have conversations about what our parents did that affected us positive (or negatively) so that we can learn from the billions of experiences in each generation. What’s something you feel your parents did right that impacted you positively.

To say my parents did something right is an embellishment. I didn’t grow up with the super supportive, peerlessly present parents. I had a step dad and my mom. They weren’t my champions in anything I did and “tough love” was an understatement, it was a lot of me being the shadow or after thought that was more of a nuisance. My step dad and I fought like cats and dogs, our relationship was fire and gasoline. My mother, just buried her head and allowed it all to happen with no interference. I spent a lot of my childhood in and out of juvenile hall and raising myself.

This isn’t the beginning to the story most people want to hear but it’s real and true. What this all taught me though, is to be independent. I learned a lot in life having to have those experiences all by myself. I learned to survive on my own by any means necessary, which for me was watching, learning, waiting for my opportunity to use the knowledge I have procured. There was a lot of highs and lows for me, but those lows helped me to have a lot more highs. I am a smarter business owner, more proficient in my endeavors, and gave me a thirst for knowledge, and an insatiable hunger to be better than my parents or anyone ever thought I would amount to be. I can’t say definitively what my parents’ impact was/will be; I’m simply not finished with my story to make that call. However, supporting my children as a shamelessly proud mother and fierce advocate for their dreams has shown me the parents that they should have been. I don’t hold any resentment towards my parents though, had they not forsaken me, I wouldn’t be a survivor, a warrior, a better parent, or as astute as I am, and for that I thank them. The fact is that while most others blame their parents for their misfortunes, at some point I chose to use the adversity of no safety nets to fuel the fire that I used to forge myself. It’s a testament to the notion that we’re never truly done building/destroying ourselves.

Great, appreciate you sharing that with us. Before we ask you to share more of your insights, can you take a moment to introduce yourself and how you got to where you are today to our readers.

I met a group of friends who were DJs when I was the ripe ole age of 21 and I was just completely overwhelmed and oddly obsessed with how they execute such whimsical art!! I have always been a huge music lover. There has never been a day that goes by that I don’t listen to music. In fact, I’m listening to music as I write this. I had many friends in the industry who I looked up to and who were huge inspirations to me. I ended up getting married to a DJ, who began to teach me to do everything I had been obsessing over, and at the age of 26, I began djing. I got divorced last year and had to completely rebuild myself. I renamed myself DJ Phoenix and have been rising from the ashes to have my own successful company as an independent contractor boss mom. I still have my full-time job, I just love the company I work for so much I can’t let that go (I also like money and make good money there). I work M-F and DJ Tuesday-Saturday most weeks all while still being a mom. I’m also working on a Youtube channel/podcast with one of my oldest friends. I have been blessed to have met a huge community of DJs who are always helping me be better, get better, and support me in my endeavors.

Aside from working a full-time job and being a mom… simply put, I’m a DJ. Not just a DJ though, I’m a music virtuoso, wedding coordinator, event elevating, mood setting, captivating music enthusiast. I love going where the people are and playing music that lights their souls on fire and puts a smile on their faces.

I pride myself in reading a room full of people and just knowing the right song or mix of songs that are going to get them up and moving. Having a great time, living, and laughing. I love knowing that someone could have had the worst day ever, they came out to have a drink, and ended up smiling, dancing, laughing, changing their whole night around because I played music that just made them and everyone around them feel good, even if it was just in that moment, they forget all the bad that happened in their day.

I think I set myself apart from the others DJs because I’m completely versatile. I have learned so many tips and tricks along the way to be able to mix anything and everything together. My sets are never the same and you never know what is coming next. I can go from country to top 40 to heavy metal and right into disco. I don’t just play what’s hot on the radio right now, I’ll play music from the 60s and mash it right into a song released yesterday. I will be you day of coordinator, DJ, seamstress, and bouncer at your wedding. Ill hold your hair, give you water and bread, and tuck you into a safe place when you’ve partied to hard for your birthday. I genuinely care about not only what I’m doing, but those who hire me to do it.

Let’s talk about resilience next – do you have a story you can share with us?

Well as I stated previously, I was married to a DJ and when I began to dj, the industry and everyone in it knew us as a duo. When we got divorced, I had to make a whole new name for myself. I had to pull myself from his shadow and prove to everyone I am just as good, if not better on my own and that I am my own brand.

It definitely has not been smooth sailing. It still isn’t. The DJ world is viewed as a man’s world. Hearing of a female DJ was like hearing of a unicorn when I first started, and in some places still is. Honestly, there are still a lot of bars/nightclubs that would never even entertain the thought of a female DJ.

I feel like I have to work twice as hard at mastering the craft just to prove I can hang with the “big boys” so to speak. It also does not help I’m 4 ft 10 inches, and a lot of places seem the think I’m too dainty or fragile to handle all the heavy lifting, which I do on a daily. The stigma of a DJ should be a man is really an outdated though, and although it may slow me down, it definitely does not stop me.

What’s a lesson you had to unlearn and what’s the backstory?

I had to unlearn that certain skills or “flare” that other DJ’s do is what makes you successful in the industry. I fostered this idea that I had to be EXACTLY like the top dj’s in the industry, in order to be successful. That just simply isn’t true. I have so much respect for a lot of my peers and their styles, but I had to retrain myself that I am just as good as them in my own way.

A lot of DJ’s will do certain flare like scratching, juggling, use vinyl, etc. and those are all things that take many years, a whole lot of practice, and time to master the art of, but they aren’t necessarily something that you MUST be able to execute in order to be successful. I have worked myself tirelessly practicing the art of mixing and transitioning from one song to the next, learning my music library, what is relevant, what blends well, and reading my crowd to know what is working for them to have a memorable night. You may not be able to see me behind the dj booth, but you definitely hear and know it’s me!

The lessons most valued are often the ones hardest learned. Void of any easy lessons, the industry forced me into a space where I needed to – and currently do – value myself as well as my journey.

Contact Info:

• Facebook: www.facebook.com/djphoenixkc
• Other: More to come soon!

Image Credits
Golden Juniper Photography SmokeShow Boudoir